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I have a GF who I have been dating for only 5 months. She started talking about marriage after about, literally, 1 month of dating. She scared away two other girls I had just met, and was starteding to date, while figuring who I liked the most, by basicly stalking me. She constantly stays over EVERY night, wont let me sleep alone and wont give me space or personal time; she is really hott and really cute, Im 35 and she is 26, but, this stalker behavior really bothers me. I have TRIED to break up with her, but I am weak, for some reason I can never pull the trigger. Now, I am in the process of moving to Dallas, I told her I am moving, and she wound up talking me into taking a trip with her to Dallas back in May, so she could see where I will be living (Uptown) and she said she LOVED it and wants to move there with me in a couple months. My married brother tells me that she is actually perfect and I should man up, pull the trigger, move to Dallas with her and get married.
What are the problems? here:
1. Stalker behaviour
2. Flat chested (sorry ladies, it can be important to guys)
3. Most important - even tho she likes to have a lot of sex, she is not great in bed, she lays there and makes me do all the work, wont talk dirty etc. Its like having sex with a pillow or a blow up doll. Oh - and she wont "trim" down there (trying to keep it clean).
Ok, what should I do? Run for the hills, or just accept her flaws and get married to her?
(My thoughts: not a good idea to get married to someone whom I dont really like having sex with.)
This is how my life works: I go months with no girlfriends, and then I usually meet a LOT of girls, at the same time, and they fight over me, and then I have to make decisions and it is not pleasant to break people's hearts. And I usually make the wrong decision somehow and wind up dating someone I dont really like. And hence, here I am, Im 35 and still not married.
What are your thoughts on the situation with this girl?
If after 5 months you feel this way, ain't no way it's going to last a lifetime.
Yes thats what I keep thinking as well. Something tells me to break up, move to Dallas and meet new people. She pesters me for seks every night and quite frankly I dont want to have seks with her.
Another strange twist: Her father had a seks change. Yes, he is a woman now. Sounds crazy, I know. Again, this is not a troll, this is for real, and I think that has messed with her head and so she is so desparate and clingy for this reason. When she told me about it, I acted like it did not bother me, but, quite frankly it does. But I never told her that and I think that she thinks I am accepting of her messed up family situation, and wants to lock me in, so to speak.
Location: from houstoner to bostoner to new yorker to new jerseyite ;)
4,084 posts, read 12,687,192 times
Reputation: 1974
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chop_Chop_Sucka
Yes, I am serious, no troll.
This is how my life works: I go months with no girlfriends, and then I usually meet a LOT of girls, at the same time, and they fight over me, and then I have to make decisions and it is not pleasant to break people's hearts. And I usually make the wrong decision somehow and wind up dating someone I dont really like. And hence, here I am, Im 35 and still not married.
What are your thoughts on the situation with this girl?
Since you asked, my thoughts are you're extremely immature and shallow and fancy yourself as some kind of Don Juan and that's why you're still not married.
My thoughts are you're extremely immature and shallow and fancy yourself as some kind of Don Juan and that's why you're still not married.
Touche!
No. It's actually because I had a job that involved a LOT of travel. It's not easy to establish regular relationships with people when you are never in one place for more than a week. But, there were times when I would be home for 3 or 4 weeks, and would use that time to try and meet people in the area I lived. But now, for the past two yrs, I have not had a travel-oriented job, and have made more serious attempts at settling down. The option to move to Dallas came about about 5 months ago (right after I met this particular women), so again, another strange twist.
Location: from houstoner to bostoner to new yorker to new jerseyite ;)
4,084 posts, read 12,687,192 times
Reputation: 1974
Uh huh, okay. I base my opinion on the fact that you said your girlfriend is really "hott" and cute, but you don't like having "seks" with her, yet you wonder if you should get married. And pray tell, how do you end up dating women you don't like? Why would you consider living with or marrying someone you don't even like? You don't know what you want. You sound like one of these guys looking for a trophy wife, like women are interchangeable and there to please and amuse you. There is nothing of substance in your post suggesting you should be thinking about settling down with anyone anytime soon. Ergo, "Are you serious? "
being weak is not good but seeing your weaknesses is great wisdom. but go see a counselor if you think its a problem.
for people that get people addictions counseling & 12 step programs are great.
do not move in. back away dont break up 1 lane changes work.
hang in there guy.
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