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Old 02-05-2016, 04:21 AM
 
7,185 posts, read 2,768,131 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Escort Rider View Post
We men can become "invisible" too as we age.
My point? Men are not completely immune from that invisibility.
So true... reminds me of a line in one of the "Thirty Something" tv series: character says something about another horrible thing about getting older, ends with "invisible to teenage girls".
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Old 02-05-2016, 04:31 AM
 
7,185 posts, read 2,768,131 times
Reputation: 3172
Quote:
Originally Posted by VTGal View Post
the doc is asking about your DH's past career?...
Also have to wonder why he was asking about the DH when you were the one he was examining, kind of strange
Reminds me of yet another instance where being a woman basically made me invisible... Both hubs and I applied for jobs once at the same organization. I had experience for a specific opening. Hubs had no experience in that, so had applied for a different job there. In the interview, they didn't ask me anything about my experience, but immediately asked me about his experience. I was like, excuse me? Are you asking me, during my interview, for a reference for a candidate who applied for a different job?
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Old 02-05-2016, 08:04 AM
 
Location: Planet Woof
3,139 posts, read 3,524,937 times
Reputation: 9889
Guy's just making small talk. Who cares? I don't look for stress and strife where there is none.
Did you ask what HIS wife does for a living? This imagined "slighting" could go on and on. Life is too short.
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Old 02-05-2016, 08:05 AM
 
11,298 posts, read 8,490,785 times
Reputation: 20533
Yeah. I'm not retired but it's everywhere. I pulled out my retired military ID for a discount and once someone said "Is that your son?" (um no, my son does not have a woman's name)

Sometimes when I ask about discounts I get "is your husband military?". Sort of the nature of the beast.

I like being in a group of people at work and being ignored by the people who don't know me (contractor, usually). Then when important questions arise, my coworkers look at me and the contractor realizes he screwed up. LOL That's priceless!!!

I wouldn't take it personally. It's ignorance on their part. Sometimes I appreciate not having to discuss my past. I don't volunteer information.
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Old 02-05-2016, 08:34 AM
 
Location: Baltimore, MD
3,747 posts, read 4,233,688 times
Reputation: 6867
Quote:
Originally Posted by FeelinLow View Post
Guy's just making small talk. Who cares? I don't look for stress and strife where there is none.
Did you ask what HIS wife does for a living? This imagined "slighting" could go on and on. Life is too short.
Actually, that's a great idea. I would have done that without even thinking - whether it is in a doctor's office or at a cocktail party. If you are kind enough to show interest in my family, I will respond in kind. "Oh, hubby was a ________ and I was a _________. What about your wife? What does she do?"
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Old 02-05-2016, 08:38 AM
 
663 posts, read 484,219 times
Reputation: 1705
Escort: it was two years ago, actually.
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Old 02-05-2016, 09:28 AM
 
6,395 posts, read 5,114,186 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hunterseat View Post
Yeah. I'm not retired but it's everywhere. I pulled out my retired military ID for a discount and once someone said "Is that your son?" (um no, my son does not have a woman's name)

Sometimes when I ask about discounts I get "is your husband military?". Sort of the nature of the beast.

I like being in a group of people at work and being ignored by the people who don't know me (contractor, usually). Then when important questions arise, my coworkers look at me and the contractor realizes he screwed up. LOL That's priceless!!!

I wouldn't take it personally. It's ignorance on their part. Sometimes I appreciate not having to discuss my past. I don't volunteer information.
I'm retired military - female, but live in an area that once had five military bases, so don't get any second looks.

The one thing that used to bother me was that they assumed I was Guard or Reserve - no - active duty!
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Old 02-05-2016, 11:56 AM
 
Location: Hayden
446 posts, read 555,606 times
Reputation: 1147
I'm a man and when I tell people I'm retired less than half of them ask what I'm retired from.

So... another example of a woman picking a fight over nothing. Good God, get over yourselves.
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Old 02-05-2016, 01:15 PM
 
6,567 posts, read 3,126,129 times
Reputation: 6084
Quote:
Originally Posted by joni78 View Post
Just today, was at attorney's office to update wills, POA's, healthcare directives, etc. After my 3rd question, he calls me out for asking 'so many questions'. I was speechless. Who doesn't ask questions? Sensing my reaction, he quickly adds 'how smart you are, I ought to give you a job, normally folks don't have all these questions' blah blah blah. Felt totally patronized. Doubt this would have happened to a guy.
I've never had someone ask about my H career rather than mine, but I do get this a lot.


My sister and I joke that if we need surgery we will have to go to a different town because we have ticked off so many of the local surgeons by daring to ask questions AND expect answers when advocating for our parents. It gets tedious having to manage them by wasting time stroking their ego's and calming them down so we can get to the questions.


Same thing with lawyers, accountants and a financial planner(who was a woman btw) we just dealt with. We have over time, developed great good guy/bad guy routine we use. Its gotten to the point we usually know how it will go and decide who will ask what before we go.


Not sure I chalk it up to ageism or sexism. I think it is more arrogance or maybe impatience myself.
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Old 02-05-2016, 01:55 PM
 
450 posts, read 285,107 times
Reputation: 2954
[QUOTE So... another example of a woman picking a fight over nothing. Good God, get over yourselves.[/quote]

This strikes me as an extreme response to a woman who made it clear she was not angry, still liked the health professional, but found the attitude puzzling enough to want to discuss with the group.
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