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Old 12-07-2012, 04:14 PM
 
Location: TN/NC
35,077 posts, read 31,313,313 times
Reputation: 47550

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Just the act of moving is probably going to cost you $1000 or more. I am moving back to Kingsport in a few weeks and the smallest Penske truck was like $600 from IA to TN, plus its gas. That's on short notice, but long moves are not cheap. If you were to take your car and a UHaul from CA to TN, you're looking at $2000 or more most likely. If you sell everything in CA, pack the car full, and drive, and then buy new stuff here, it's still expensive, maybe more so. I don't know how much you make now, but it sounds like not much if he is looking for minimum wage employment here. It doesn't seem like you can even afford to move.

The Tri-Cities labor market is weak outside of medical/education, as anyone who has read my posts knows, but if you are only shooting for minimum wage, it should be easily doable. Having no state income tax is great, if you'd make enough to be paying a state income tax. A minimum wage employee will probably pay no net state income tax in most states, and as a prior poster said, the TN sales tax on food really hits poor people hard. TN has a lot of virtues, but it is an extremely difficult state to live for someone on such a low income.

Minimum wage ($7.25/hr) is only $290 per week. For the average four week month, you're only grossing $1,160/month, or $13,290. All these numbers are assuming he's working full time, which won't be the case, and are before any taxes. What if the car gives trouble or you have an unexpected bill? You need to have at least a small savings put back to account for such things. Even with government benefits, you will not survive on this as a family of three. End of story.

It would be great if one of you could go back to school and improve your wages, but with this move, you won't be able to afford to. You need to stay where you are, do something to improve your income, save some money, then move.
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Old 12-07-2012, 06:46 PM
 
192 posts, read 348,528 times
Reputation: 140
Quote:
Originally Posted by Emigrations View Post
Just the act of moving is probably going to cost you $1000 or more. I am moving back to Kingsport in a few weeks and the smallest Penske truck was like $600 from IA to TN, plus its gas. That's on short notice, but long moves are not cheap. If you were to take your car and a UHaul from CA to TN, you're looking at $2000 or more most likely. If you sell everything in CA, pack the car full, and drive, and then buy new stuff here, it's still expensive, maybe more so. I don't know how much you make now, but it sounds like not much if he is looking for minimum wage employment here. It doesn't seem like you can even afford to move.

The Tri-Cities labor market is weak outside of medical/education, as anyone who has read my posts knows, but if you are only shooting for minimum wage, it should be easily doable. Having no state income tax is great, if you'd make enough to be paying a state income tax. A minimum wage employee will probably pay no net state income tax in most states, and as a prior poster said, the TN sales tax on food really hits poor people hard. TN has a lot of virtues, but it is an extremely difficult state to live for someone on such a low income.

Minimum wage ($7.25/hr) is only $290 per week. For the average four week month, you're only grossing $1,160/month, or $13,290. All these numbers are assuming he's working full time, which won't be the case, and are before any taxes. What if the car gives trouble or you have an unexpected bill? You need to have at least a small savings put back to account for such things. Even with government benefits, you will not survive on this as a family of three. End of story.

It would be great if one of you could go back to school and improve your wages, but with this move, you won't be able to afford to. You need to stay where you are, do something to improve your income, save some money, then move.
We have considered moving costs and have that worked out already. But I still have a few question. Why do you say he wont be able to find a full time job? I also looked at state and county labor jobs and he would be starting at $10.55 full time. Are those jobs hard to get? You do have great advice, its just that school is a big expense in itself, my husband is not home about ten hours a day including driving to work. There is no time for him to go to school, and sending me to school couldnt happen. Paying for school and daycare is out of the question. If we do all of these things we are looking at a lot of time and money we just dont have. Now I am really going back and forth on what to do. Im so confused. My husband says we have to get out of CA..
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Old 12-07-2012, 10:22 PM
 
1,380 posts, read 2,398,707 times
Reputation: 2405
Life's difficult, isn't it? Gonna have to make tough choices and smart plans. Maybe get a little creative on the income front. Gov't jobs are great, even more for the benefits than the pay. But they are very hard to get because so many people would like one and every level orf gov't, federal state and local, is broke and in many ways broken, right now. Like with most jobs, it helps to know the right people. Just as a random suggestion, how would you feel about husband being a truck driver? They make very decent money and it doesn't require acollege degree. Would require better spatial skills than I have, but it's an idea that could get you out of California soon if that is a priority. You could make decent money as a waitress. Just about every rural exit on I-40 in TN has a Cracker Barrel. Nothing glamorous, but it can pay bills way better than minimum wage. It's also nice to meet people as being a stay at home in the country can be EXTREMELY isolating.
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Old 12-08-2012, 12:02 AM
 
239 posts, read 520,690 times
Reputation: 292
Have you thought about things you can do to make a little extra money as a stay-at-home mom. When I was first married and we had our first baby, I used to watch other people's children. I also made jewelry that we sold on the weekend at the local flea market. Now that I'm retired and need a little extra income, I have an Internet shop. I buy and resell vintage items and also sew and make things like pillows and scarfs out of vintage fabric. There are lots of things you can make with a little skill and creativity.
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Old 12-08-2012, 08:41 AM
 
Location: The Conterminous United States
22,584 posts, read 54,294,239 times
Reputation: 13615
As I said, apply for financial aid. Many times between grants, aid and loans the daycare will be covered. You ignored this advice. By the time I was 24, I had two children. Do NOT make the same mistake I made. GO TO SCHOOL.
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Old 12-08-2012, 10:36 AM
 
4,787 posts, read 11,763,231 times
Reputation: 12760
Unfortunately, in reading back through the OP's post and replies, it appears she has already made her decision. Her query and responses are not to ask how to improve their lives. Her request to is to figure out how to continue to support three people or more on one minimum wage job. That is the life choice they have made.

Every attempt by other posters to suggest ways to get ahead with jobs, education is met with excuses why they can't. The OP seems perfectly content to sit at home all day , no car, no TV, no internet and stare at her child. She even wants to have more. She does not even have the funds or ability to get out and purchase craft supplies or sell them on the internet. She'll have no family in the area, no support system, and no ability to make friends if you can't get out.

Sometimes poverty is thrust upon us, through illness, bad accident, job loss, etc. However, some people choose poverty. That is what this young family is doing. They are making choices that are putting them at the bottom of the economic heap and there they will stay. We won't even talk about saving for retirement, because bag lady-ness is all that is ahead for her.

Simply put, three people cannot survive in this country on one minimum wage job and expect to have any kind of life. One illness, one accident and they will be living in their car or pitching a tent in the woods. Nor should the rest of us have to support the health care of two able bodied adults, because it will be public services that they will be using.

The OP and her husband really need to figure out where they are headed financially. The OP really needs to learn to drive. Then he can work days and she can work nights or vice versa. The one at home watches the child. Or he works days and she works weekends. The extra money will allow for some classes and some savings..

And yes, truck drivers are in demand. But classes have to be taken for that, fees paid, etc. At some point, this little family is going to have to realize that they will need to work a lot harder than they are if they are going to survive. That means a job for her and maybe one and a half jobs for him. You don't need college degrees because good tradesmen can find jobs. That also requires some years of sacrifice and working days, school at night, weekends, etc. until they are able to qualify for decent jobs. Sitting home is not an option. They both have to work.

I wish them all the luck in the world because what is ahead for them with the OP's current plan is not pretty. This is all very sad.
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Old 12-08-2012, 12:28 PM
 
192 posts, read 348,528 times
Reputation: 140
Quote:
Originally Posted by willow wind View Post
Unfortunately, in reading back through the OP's post and replies, it appears she has already made her decision. Her query and responses are not to ask how to improve their lives. Her request to is to figure out how to continue to support three people or more on one minimum wage job. That is the life choice they have made.

Every attempt by other posters to suggest ways to get ahead with jobs, education is met with excuses why they can't. The OP seems perfectly content to sit at home all day , no car, no TV, no internet and stare at her child. She even wants to have more. She does not even have the funds or ability to get out and purchase craft supplies or sell them on the internet. She'll have no family in the area, no support system, and no ability to make friends if you can't get out.

Sometimes poverty is thrust upon us, through illness, bad accident, job loss, etc. However, some people choose poverty. That is what this young family is doing. They are making choices that are putting them at the bottom of the economic heap and there they will stay. We won't even talk about saving for retirement, because bag lady-ness is all that is ahead for her.

Simply put, three people cannot survive in this country on one minimum wage job and expect to have any kind of life. One illness, one accident and they will be living in their car or pitching a tent in the woods. Nor should the rest of us have to support the health care of two able bodied adults, because it will be public services that they will be using.

The OP and her husband really need to figure out where they are headed financially. The OP really needs to learn to drive. Then he can work days and she can work nights or vice versa. The one at home watches the child. Or he works days and she works weekends. The extra money will allow for some classes and some savings..

And yes, truck drivers are in demand. But classes have to be taken for that, fees paid, etc. At some point, this little family is going to have to realize that they will need to work a lot harder than they are if they are going to survive. That means a job for her and maybe one and a half jobs for him. You don't need college degrees because good tradesmen can find jobs. That also requires some years of sacrifice and working days, school at night, weekends, etc. until they are able to qualify for decent jobs. Sitting home is not an option. They both have to work.

I wish them all the luck in the world because what is ahead for them with the OP's current plan is not pretty. This is all very sad.
Wow, you have no idea what you are talking about. First of all just because I hadnt replied right away doesnt mean I am not taking their advice. I hadnt seen the posts yet. I actually do a lot for my family financially, maybe I dont actually have a job, but I am constantly educating myself on how to live frugally and I do know how to make plenty. I sacrifice a lot, and prefer to not even be taking from my family. I actually make cosmetics and could probably sell some things for a little extra money. My husband could be a truck driver and the reason I was talking about minimum wage is because I am thinking worst case scenario. Right now my husband works at taylor guitar. Neither of us take ANYTHING from the government. I made it clear that I dont like taking from people, and obviously when I am left needing help I choose to have family help me. Dont worry about it. You will never have to spend your precious money on me. I am someone who would sacrifice EVERYTHING I have before taking assistance I dont need. My husband was a firefighter and chose that he didnt want to do that anymore, we would have that to fall back on, and he would join the military before he let us end up on the streets. We have options, if we need them, its just not what we want. He already has his class B license. I would be willing to work a part time job at night if my husband could watch the baby. Daycare is NOT an option. It will never happen until my baby girl can talk. Im sorry but I just dont trust people. I am very open to advice and appreciate everyone taking their time to give it to me. But I am not going to lie and say I am going to do something that I wont. I am being honest to the people trying to help me. I asked for advice, and you have not given any. And you say sitting at home all day like I dont do anything for my family or for my daughter. And you also make it sound that giving up cable and internet for my family to live better is a bad thing. I dont drive and have not gotten my license because there is really no point. My husband and I go shopping on the weekends and he has the car at work with him all day, and at this point we cant afford to buy another car. I said I will learn when the time comes for me to learn. And where did I say anything about having more? I want to raise my child, not have a daycare raise her, and my daughter comes first. I am not lazy, nor incapable of finding ways to make money at home, that was actually a great suggestion. You dont know anything about me so dont act like you do.
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Old 12-08-2012, 12:32 PM
 
192 posts, read 348,528 times
Reputation: 140
By the way, I make cosmetics, I have a bottle cutter and make cups, candles, wind chimes, etc. with old wine bottles. I can babysit or even sell my breastmilk if I absolutely had to. Id be a freaking surrogate before I let anything bad happen to my family or took government help using your tax money.
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Old 12-08-2012, 03:04 PM
 
1,380 posts, read 2,398,707 times
Reputation: 2405
Not trying to turn this into a political thing, but we've come across a pet peeve of mine that I have to address. We all take things from the government. All those roads and schools and parks weren't free and they weren't cheap. We all enjoy a great deal of security because enormous numbers of very bad people are locked away and that's not cheap either. To say nothing of the huge cost of the military who work hard to keep us safe from threats abroad. And I doubt you'll be passing up all the many tax benefits of having a child, so get off your high horse about not taking things from the government, because we all do. And that's as it should be. Becuase some things can't be done by the individual.
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Old 12-08-2012, 05:00 PM
 
192 posts, read 348,528 times
Reputation: 140
Quote:
Originally Posted by eastmemphisguy View Post
Not trying to turn this into a political thing, but we've come across a pet peeve of mine that I have to address. We all take things from the government. All those roads and schools and parks weren't free and they weren't cheap. We all enjoy a great deal of security because enormous numbers of very bad people are locked away and that's not cheap either. To say nothing of the huge cost of the military who work hard to keep us safe from threats abroad. And I doubt you'll be passing up all the many tax benefits of having a child, so get off your high horse about not taking things from the government, because we all do. And that's as it should be. Becuase some things can't be done by the individual.
I felt attacked by Willow Wind who was basically saying I cant do anything for myself, and Im going to be one of those people who sit around and take from the government. Apparently this is turning from helping me into attacking me and Im sorry I ever trusted random people on the internet for advice when all I am trying to do is the right thing for my family. *********.
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