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2.) once the child/children turn 5 they go to school for 8 hours a day. So all you're really doing is getting them ready for school, Doing homework at night and send them to bed.
Hahaha! That really made me smile!
1) No school I know of is 8 hrs a day
2) Who do you think runs the PTAs, class parties, school activities, fundraising foundations, community outreach, etc? Working parents are involved, but most of the volunteering hours are put in by stay-at-home-parents.
3) Extracurriculars? Music? Sports? Umpteen other options that are not necessary, but enhance a family's life and offer the child opportunities.
Yes. It's not a "job" job. The way I think of it is...if you aren't in danger of getting fired if you're 15 minutes late with dinner, it's not a job. If you aren't graded on merit annually, it's not a job. If you aren't in danger of being demoted or laid off, it's not a job. If you can do a lousy "job" of it, and still keep your "job," it's not a real job. If you aren't called into HR for being late or not working as a "team" with the rest of the family, it's not a job.
I'm not saying one should literally put "Stay at Home Mother: Jan 1, 1995 through present" on their resumes, but your definition of a "job" is incredibly narrow!! How about those who work-from-home? How about the SELF-EMPLOYED? And the many, many other people who don't fit your narrow (and somewhat depressing) interpretation of what defines a "job"?!
And PLENTY of folks are lousy at their jobs, and yet are able to keep them!!
When the kids were in school (just one year; we homeschool), I was constantly on the run. Drive them to school, volunteer in the classroom, go to Peace Day and Music Day and Class Play Day and Science Day and all the rest, pick up a kid with a stomachache or fever, run the kid with a rash on her hands (contact dermatitis) to the pediatrician to get clearance to return to school, pick them up, take them to extracurricular activities, etc. Plus they were each home a handful of days for colds/the flu/fever/vomiting/whatever.
I don't know how working moms do it, to be honest. I work, but I'm self-employed and can make my own hours, so I'd just work around the planned and surprise disruptions. I had no time to be a lady of luxury who ate bonbons. I was obviously doing something wrong! LOL
It's not a job, but that doesn't mean its not an extremely important and valuable use of a woman's time. I wouldn't want my kids being raised by someone making slightly more than minimum wage to do so. Also, I would rather work full-time than be the one to stay home with young kids.
i have kids and i really don't think being a SAHM is a "job." Jobs=Payment. Jobs=Hiring Process. some say SAHM is being a FT mom but does that mean when their kids go to school they become a PT mom? every mom is a FT mom.
I think so. If you send your kids to school/daycare, then you're only parenting them part of the time. The teacher is the one who becomes their primary caregiver.
Quote:
Originally Posted by TiltheEndofTime
I just can't stand it when sahps say they don't want daycare to "raise" their kids...do they not realize how ignorant and insulting that is? Parents who work outside the home don't stop being parents or raising their kids because they are gainfully employed.
It is the sanctimommy attitude that so many sahms have that annoys me.
As someone who wants to be a SAHM and homeschool (my future kids that don't exist yet), yes I do realize how insulting it is.
But please remember, that anyone who sends their child to daycare is not the primary caregiver. To me, being a working parent with a child in daycare is the equivalent of being a non-custodial parent who pays child support. The non-custodial parent generally spends a few hours a month with their child (just like a working parent only has a few hours a month to spend with their child) and pays child support.
I'm not a parent, but I'd argue the most enduring part of it would be during the early stages, trying to get some shut eye during the night. Not to mention, always having to be alert and attentive to your child's needs.
That said, you're essentially your own boss. So there's no outside pressure, per se, to complete the job a certain way. I can imagine that it would still be tiresome chasing kids around. That's why I remain an uncle, and I like it that way.
Ya, it's all fine and dandy until husband dies or cheats or beats you. What is a woman with no skills and no work experience supposed to do for money if that happens?
Many women learn how to work from home and not even leave the house. The INTERNET may save the family. Ironicisn't it?
Ya, it's all fine and dandy until husband dies or cheats or beats you. What is a woman with no skills and no work experience supposed to do for money if that happens?
I've seen this in my own family. The woman has little recourse; if she has no education and hasn't been in the workforce for 20 years. She is completely and totally dependent upon the whims of her husband. No thanx.
Quote:
Originally Posted by BradPiff
Especially when you consider
1.)The vast majority of Stay at home moms are in middle class to wealthy households(husband is a doctor, lawyer, investment banker etc) where you can afford nannies
2.) once the child/children turn 5 they go to school for 8 hours a day. So all you're really doing is getting them ready for school, Doing homework at night and send them to bed.
That was my experience as well; they were the wealthier families and there were often cleaning women and once school started - job got a lot easier.
Quote:
Originally Posted by AfternoonCoffee
Hahaha! That really made me smile!
1) No school I know of is 8 hrs a day
2) Who do you think runs the PTAs, class parties, school activities, fundraising foundations, community outreach, etc? Working parents are involved, but most of the volunteering hours are put in by stay-at-home-parents.
3) Extracurriculars? Music? Sports? Umpteen other options that are not necessary, but enhance a family's life and offer the child opportunities.
You obviously don't have kids
That's crap. I worked full time and volunteered on the executive PTA Board, Boxtop Chairperson; all the trips and excursions; class parties, etc etc. It's really NOT just for SAHM's though many would like you to think that.
My son swam year round for high school and also on the USA Club team - all of which required travel, travel, travel.
Indeed - it certainly can be done and is done every day by working parents.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pinkmani
I think so. If you send your kids to school/daycare, then you're only parenting them part of the time. The teacher is the one who becomes their primary caregiver.
As someone who wants to be a SAHM and homeschool (my future kids that don't exist yet), yes I do realize how insulting it is.
But please remember, that anyone who sends their child to daycare is not the primary caregiver. To me, being a working parent with a child in daycare is the equivalent of being a non-custodial parent who pays child support. The non-custodial parent generally spends a few hours a month with their child (just like a working parent only has a few hours a month to spend with their child) and pays child support.
The bolded might be the dumbest thing I have ever heard. Obviously, you do not have children.
Homeschooling is a whole separate category that, to me, seems like a horrible choice for your kids. Keep them locked up with their mother all day - who thinks that is a good thing? I need to only to look at the Duggars to see exactly how I would NOT want my kids to turn out.
There you go. I can demean your choices as foolish and selfish as well.
Maybe you should want to comment until you actually HAVE kids. You might be better informed.
I think so. If you send your kids to school/daycare, then you're only parenting them part of the time. The teacher is the one who becomes their primary caregiver.
As someone who wants to be a SAHM and homeschool (my future kids that don't exist yet), yes I do realize how insulting it is.
But please remember, that anyone who sends their child to daycare is not the primary caregiver. To me, being a working parent with a child in daycare is the equivalent of being a non-custodial parent who pays child support. The non-custodial parent generally spends a few hours a month with their child (just like a working parent only has a few hours a month to spend with their child) and pays child support.
I second the other poster who said this is the dumbest thing they've heard. Do you actually know how daycare works? Do you think parents just drop the kids off on Monday morning and then go back to collect them on Friday night every other weekend? Even if a kid is in full time daycare for 9 or 10 hours a day, their parents still spend far more time with them than the daycare does. For school age kids, when a kid is in school for 6 or 7 hours a day in a class with 30 other kids, how is that teacher now spending more time with that child than their parents do?
Please don't home school; you obviously don't have a lot of common sense to pass on to your kids.
The comparison with a non-custodial parent paying child support is perhaps excessive, but I agree with the part about a working parent not being the primary caregiver. If you're dropping your child off for 10 hours at daycare, those people are doing the majority of their care. I don't see how you can deny that. I'm not passing judgement by saying so. Parents have all sorts of reason for working and putting their kids in daycare. But it's true that you're letting someone else do a lot of raising your children, during an impressionable age.
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