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Jazzcat22 and ClaraC, have you considered timing your arrival with the people who are usually late? I am a bit lucky in that all of the fun friends show up within 15 minutes of an agreed upon time but we work it out in advance with a couple of phone calls that day. So any "new" people not really part of the regular group are not left hanging. Of course, even after the adjustments there is still one person late so they all talk poorly about that person who is late (not me). I just find it funny that they keep insisting on inviting late people and then complain about them.
If you are aware of their lateness then tell them to meet you 30 minutes earlier before the actual time you want to meet. I guarantee you both will be walking in at same time.
If you're suppose to meet up at 11:00 am tell them to meet you there at 10:30 am. You show up at 11:00 am and they will actually be on time for once. Or you can show up at 11:15 just to make sure they arrived and you won't be the one waiting around. Just lie and tell them you will meet them there at 10:30 when really you plan on arriving at 11:00. Their lateness will make them early, if that make sense.
I know people who seem to view time as flexible. If they want to do a bunch of stuff, they feel they can stuff too many things into a finite span of time. I think they have a faulty inner clock, or they procrastinate getting ready. I do think that extremely punctual people hate lateness. Being late really maddens them, especially when it happens frequently.
But what puzzles me the most is when people go to a certain place, such as work, school, or church regularly, at the same time on the same days, and cannot be on time. I don’t get why these people cannot figure out how to be on time.
I think they don’t really want to go there, or they are simply undisciplined. Or being on time is not important to them. Honestly, I don't know.
I know people who seem to view time as flexible. If they want to do a bunch of stuff, they feel they can stuff too many things into a finite span of time. I think they have a faulty inner clock, or they procrastinate getting ready. I do think that extremely punctual people hate lateness. Being late really maddens them, especially when it happens frequently.
But what puzzles me the most is when people go to a certain place, such as work, school, or church regularly, at the same time on the same days, and cannot be on time. I don’t get why these people cannot figure out how to be on time.
I think they don’t really want to go there, or they are simply undisciplined. Or being on time is not important to them. Honestly, I don't know.
You've never been late for work?
I'm retired now. When I worked I would make every effort to get in on time. In one place where we lived, we didn't own a car and relied on public transportation. I would leave home early and many times, traffic would be horrible. Mind you, this was before cell phones existed so it wasn't like I could call my boss. Once I was on a train that just stopped in the tunnel right before my stop. No exaggeration---we sat there for almost half a hour. There was no PA system on the train so we never knew why we were stopped. I ended up being late by about half an hour. One of my co-workers was on the train ahead of me and she, too, got in late. I could never find that sweet spot when it came to leaving for work. One day, I overslept and quickly got ready. I was so sure that I would be really late...but...I was 15 minutes early, sitting at my desk and working. All that said, most of the time I got to work right on time. It was frustrating to get stuck in traffic when I was on the bus connecting to the train.
Jazzcat22 and ClaraC, have you considered timing your arrival with the people who are usually late? I am a bit lucky in that all of the fun friends show up within 15 minutes of an agreed upon time but we work it out in advance with a couple of phone calls that day. So any "new" people not really part of the regular group are not left hanging. Of course, even after the adjustments there is still one person late so they all talk poorly about that person who is late (not me). I just find it funny that they keep insisting on inviting late people and then complain about them.
Nope, usually just meet one person or a couple, not a group of people, so I'm waiting there twiddling my thumbs until they arrive (I don't play on a cell phone, so don't even have that). It would stress me out to arrive late---with my luck, the other(s) would be there on time that particular instance! And I just like to set the arrangements ahead of time, but then not be changing/tweaking them or conferring about them. I like to keep things really simple---and of course people have a way of complicating simplicity!
I am a punctual person yet understand that things come up and can understand when people who you’ve made plans with are a little late, up to 20 minutes, or so. However, I notice some people are always late and not just by a little. They could show up an hour or two late and barely acknowledge it. ....
I know people who seem to view time as flexible. If they want to do a bunch of stuff, they feel they can stuff too many things into a finite span of time. I think they have a faulty inner clock, or they procrastinate getting ready. I do think that extremely punctual people hate lateness. Being late really maddens them, especially when it happens frequently.
But what puzzles me the most is when people go to a certain place, such as work, school, or church regularly, at the same time on the same days, and cannot be on time. I don’t get why these people cannot figure out how to be on time.
I think they don’t really want to go there, or they are simply undisciplined. Or being on time is not important to them. Honestly, I don't know.
I think being chronically late is just rude. Late once in awhile, we all have been. I have known people all of my life that just walk in whenever they feel like it. Do they want to make a "grand entrance?"
I have taken being late to the extreme, once, I quit a great job, because I was going to be late......now that is really stupid.
Jazzcat22 and ClaraC, have you considered timing your arrival with the people who are usually late? I am a bit lucky in that all of the fun friends show up within 15 minutes of an agreed upon time but we work it out in advance with a couple of phone calls that day. So any "new" people not really part of the regular group are not left hanging. Of course, even after the adjustments there is still one person late so they all talk poorly about that person who is late (not me). I just find it funny that they keep insisting on inviting late people and then complain about them.
You realize how backwards that is? Suddenly, everybody has to adjust their schedules based on the rudeness of one or two?
I am a punctual person yet understand that things come up and can understand when people who you’ve made plans with are a little late, up to 20 minutes, or so. However, I notice some people are always late and not just by a little. They could show up an hour or two late and barely acknowledge it. They always had some sort of trouble getting out the door, etc. One time I tried to talk to a chronically late friend about how it made me feel like she didn’t value my time when she would always come late. She didn’t get it at all and instead acted like I was expecting too much from her. Instead of pressing I just stopped making plans with her.
If you are a person who is chronically late do you ever think about how your lateness impacts the people who you are meeting? Do you ever try to change and be more punctual? Does it work? If not why? What are the barriers that make being on time or even close to on time impossible?
For those who are like me, have you ever been able to get through to a chronically late person in your life and get them to see your side and make a change for the better? Is there an hope for the chronically late? Can they change?
Nope. Leave em in the dust.
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). I just find it funny that they keep insisting on inviting late people and then complain about them.
