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Old 02-11-2020, 05:05 AM
Status: "The ministers cat is an exhausted cat" (set 17 days ago)
 
Location: NJ
1,051 posts, read 359,711 times
Reputation: 3598

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bridge781 View Post
This sort of behavior pisses me off. Some women seem to think a relationship or marriage isn’t real unless she gets impregnated. I see many older woman these days going on to a second marriage and having more kids with the new partner when they already have kids. Not sure why the need for this. I don’t think it’s good for the first set of kids, it likely ends up being weird eventually for the new baby when they get older. Too many half siblings and step kids/siblings. Men do it as well.
I have an older son from a previous marriage. When i married my first husband we were young and silly and star eyed. We decided to only have 1 kid, i felt fulfilled and like my family was complete. Then a few years later we realized we were just young and dumb and ill matched and got a divorce. When i remarried i knew I wanted more children. What i originally thought was happiness with 1 child, it was just that i didnt want to expand my family with that guy. So me and my husband had a baby. He has his own children too. And our son is the glue that binds our family.

There is nothing wrong with it.
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Old 02-11-2020, 08:01 AM
 
1,959 posts, read 567,322 times
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If you’re still young and only had one kid from the previous marriage it doesn’t seem so bad. I’m talking more about woman in their 40s who already have kids from a first marriage undergoing IVF to have a baby by the 2nd or 3rd husband. Just seems selfish, unnecessary and certainly adds to overpopulation. People just literally do whatever they want these days though only thinking of themselves.
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Old 02-11-2020, 08:17 AM
 
829 posts, read 203,105 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bridge781 View Post
If you’re still young and only had one kid from the previous marriage it doesn’t seem so bad. I’m talking more about woman in their 40s who already have kids from a first marriage undergoing IVF to have a baby by the 2nd or 3rd husband. Just seems selfish, unnecessary and certainly adds to overpopulation. People just literally do whatever they want these days though only thinking of themselves.
Please show us what % of the earth population is made up of these births.
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Old 02-11-2020, 08:20 AM
 
1,959 posts, read 567,322 times
Reputation: 1505
I have no idea but I know they happen. My neighbor got divorced, had two kids with first husband then at 42 had a baby with 2nd husband.

I actually just looked at her Facebook page and she had another. Damn. Fertile woman.

Last edited by Bridge781; 02-11-2020 at 08:23 AM.. Reason: A
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Old 02-11-2020, 10:10 AM
 
829 posts, read 203,105 times
Reputation: 2453
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bridge781 View Post
I have no idea but I know they happen. My neighbor got divorced, had two kids with first husband then at 42 had a baby with 2nd husband.

I actually just looked at her Facebook page and she had another. Damn. Fertile woman.
Wow, yeah, two kids. Sounds like overpopulation to me.
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Old 02-11-2020, 10:21 AM
 
1,959 posts, read 567,322 times
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She already had two from someone else.
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Old 02-11-2020, 10:56 AM
 
Location: Pacific Northwest
438 posts, read 206,951 times
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My mother always told me to never judge a person on their family unless you want to be open to judgment on your own.

No two people are exactly the same and unless you're a part of a family then you'll never EVER understand the inner workings or "reasoning" regarding another families business. I know I've been judged by others who assume they "understand" my family and make assumptions that are completely off the mark. In fact I had to stop talking to my own family once they started to give unwanted input in how I plan and raise my own family with my husband.

It's always easy to sit back and judge others. In fact our entire culture has become obsessed with it. We sit and watch families like the Kardashians or the Royals and pretend we know everything about them because of the few dramatized and heavily edited clips of their life that get presented to us and now we all feel free to get involved and lay judgment on their character, lifestyle, and family planning because they chose one way or we see them make a single choice and make a decision to approve or disagree on that choice. But we don't base the choice on their emotions or personal needs; all the judgment is coming from our own personal set of emotions and biases that once again are no ones but our own. It's completely ridiculous to sit there and make assumptions on someone's personal life; unless they're intentionally trying to harm others or you why in Earth do you care?

Last edited by musicfamly5; 02-11-2020 at 11:57 AM..
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Old 02-11-2020, 11:18 AM
 
829 posts, read 203,105 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by musicfamly5 View Post
my mother always told me to never judge a person on their family unless you want to be open to judgment on your own.

No two people are exactly the same and unless you're a part of a family then you'll never ever understand the inner workings or "reasoning" regarding another families business. I know i've been judged by others who assume they "understand" my family and make assumptions that are completely off the mark. In fact i had to stop talking to my own family once they started to give unwanted input in how i plan and raise my own family with my husband.

It's always easy to sit back and huge others. In fact our entire culture has become obsessed with it. We sit and watch families like the kardashians or the royals and pretend we know everything about them because of the few dramatized and heavily edited clips of their life get presented to us and now we all feel free to get involved and lay judgment on their character, lifestyle, and family planning because they chose one way or we see them make a single choice and make a decision to approve or disagree on that choice. But we don't base the choice on their emotions or personal needs; all the judgment is coming from our own personal set of emotions and biases that once again are no ones but our own.
amen!
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Old 02-12-2020, 03:48 AM
 
4,950 posts, read 2,151,304 times
Reputation: 4926
The OP said the older children were into drugs, stealing and ditching school and I have read how children need to learn how to be responsible by having more freedom. Or how the best parents have children who screw up. Is being into drugs, stealing, or ditching school just screw ups? It does appear to me that the children have all the freedom they want.
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Old 02-12-2020, 06:13 AM
 
954 posts, read 539,717 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JenniferLB75 View Post
My friend had a troubled first marriage. Her kids were affected by it. She also was on her phone all the time and didn’t always pay attention to them. They were very badly behaved. After so many fights, and break ups she finally split with her husband and met and married a new man. She told me she couldn’t be married to this new guy and not give him a child so she got pregnant and had a new kid. This new child became their world and her other kids further neglected. Now her 2 children from her first marriage are teens and screwed up. Drugs, ditching school, stealing etc....people told her to not have the 3rd kid and now she doesn’t speak to them. Even her own parents who said it was a terrible idea. I kind of agree with them but won’t tell her that. Why do women think they have to give a man a child? Sometimes if isn’t always right. Sometimes it can be a bit selfish. Would it have been a better choice to give more attention to her 2 children?
She made her bed, so she can sleep in it. Hopefully her first 2 children live fine and mature up with out her, since she obviously can't be responsible.
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