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I think you shouldnt even both with trying to create and establish a relationship with anyone if you are unable to committ time with your mom being sick and all. Not his fault. Your fault. Sounds like you are not at a place where you can cultivate a relationship. Deal with your mom first, then try for love. Right now, you just arent ready. Poor guy is lucky.
I'm not totally on board with this, Lao. I think it's okay to be in a relationship. After all, if there's ever a time when somebody needs that kind of emotional support, this would be it. However, I think you make a good point, namely that this guy should be aware of what's going on in her life--and that her mother's needs come first. For romances come and go, but you only have one mother.
I think you shouldnt even both with trying to create and establish a relationship with anyone if you are unable to committ time with your mom being sick and all. Not his fault. Your fault. Sounds like you are not at a place where you can cultivate a relationship. Deal with your mom first, then try for love. Right now, you just arent ready. Poor guy is lucky.
Are you out of your mind? Or just being sarcastic?
People have all sorts of demands on their time. Jobs. School. Family. Friends. Hobbies. Housework.
This does not preclude seeking and having romantic relationships. It simply means that you have to prioritize the demands on your time.
There is no commitment to a first date. If two people decide to continue seeing each other, part of the process is finding out how interested they are in spending time with each other, and how much time.
Well, I'm going to play devil's advocate here and say that I think you should have leveled with him and told him why you needed to reschedule. He would have understood that much better then just saying something came up. He probably thought you were blowing him off and he's tired of playing games on Match. Who knows how many idiot women he also talked to on Match? He could have really been pissed and just took it out on you.
Next time, I think you need to be more upfront and tell him exactly why you're cancelling. How hard would it be for everyone to be honest and upfront with people? Everyone doesn't communicate well anymore and it leaves the other person guessing on exactly what's going on.
So I have to say I think both of you are at fault.
I think you shouldnt even both with trying to create and establish a relationship with anyone if you are unable to committ time with your mom being sick and all. Not his fault. Your fault. Sounds like you are not at a place where you can cultivate a relationship. Deal with your mom first, then try for love. Right now, you just arent ready. Poor guy is lucky.
Also-along this warped line of thinking, what would you expect if you were a few months into a relationship, and then your partner's mother fell ill? Would it be ok then to continue the relationship, or would you bail?
Timing is just what it is.
You cannot compartmantalize every single relationship.
you sound like you want a relationship where someone focuses on only you 100% of the time with no other situations or mishaps.
Well, lots of folks here disagree with me on this. Relationships need to be cultivated, this means that both need to spend time together to get to know each other. Having an understanding of the others' responsibilities is one thing, but in this case, in this instance, sounds to me like this chick just either doesnt have the time or wont make time for this to happen. Cancelling 3hours before the date to go make pasta with a sick mom is kinda flaky to me.
Trying to establish a relationship is DIFFERENT from already being in an established relationship. IF it were me, trying to hook up with a chick and I found out she's dealing with her mothers stage three cancer, I'd just tell her that I understand and to let me know when she's ready to try a relationship. Or, if she just needs someone to talk to, feel free to call.
If ol gal here just needs a shoulder to lean on, or a guy to bang, that is one thing. But trying to really establish a relationship while dealing with that seems too much forher.
omg.... after reading this I had to see where you were from. I had to laugh when I saw Miami... TYPICAL is all I have to say. Some men here are crybabies that get offiended sooo easily.
I'm sorry but I don't believe I owe anyone my personal family business until I feel they are ready to know it. It's none of his business why I had to reschedule PERIOD!!! I don't even know the guy!! And cancelling 3 hours prior is NOT last minute. If I wasn't interested, I wouldn't have mentioned rescheduling NOR calling the guy. I would have simply sent a text.
I'm sorry but I don't believe I owe anyone my personal family business until I feel they are ready to know it. It's none of his business why I had to reschedule PERIOD!!! I don't even know the guy!! And cancelling 3 hours prior is NOT last minute. If I wasn't interested, I wouldn't have mentioned rescheduling NOR calling the guy. I would have simply sent a text.
You probably post all of your events on facebook though.... You totally did this guy a favor by flaking.
You don't have to share a medical history or reveal too much information to simply inform someone, lol.
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