First date- check comes, and he looks at me?! (husband, children, jealous)

[marilyn220]

Originally Posted by oalquimista

Thank you all for the great replies, also some of you for the entertainment. I would like to say I wasn't planning on a second date with this particular man. However, my question was in terms of future dates, and if women have found men to be more cheap when first dating or they get worse as time goes on? Money is not an issue for me, it's just the point of courtesy, and I guess I was raised a different way. I agree, I wouldn't want to date a woman either

They get worse.

Come on, you KNOW this. It's Dating 101 and please don't go by the "cheap" men posting in this thread. They're more than likely "dateless" or with women with no self-esteem and so desperate to have a man that they don't mind shelling out cash for the both of them on the regular.

[marilyn220]

Originally Posted by John13

I don't want to get the topic off track but no ex wives? I don't get that. I would imagine there are plenty of decent men that have exes and are completely out of the picture.
I am one of them.

The tip he left is the deal breaker. It's a sign on how he treats others. With all due respect I can't believe you have to poll the group on whether you should see him again. To me it's a no-brainer.

I always pay on the first date since I am the one who is asking.

Good man.

It is common for the woman to offer. In fact, every date I have been on since my breakup/divorce has offered to pay.

I've never heard of this until this thread.

[John13]

Originally Posted by Celestyn

I have done that before and had my cheapskate coworkers notice the extra money on the table and try to take it. Because there was "too much money on the table."

You work with thieves?

So sorry to hear that. If it's me I do not associate with them off the job.

There is no such thing as "too much money on the table." I always overtip and I have covered for other people who I thought did not leave enough.

[Yzette]

Originally Posted by oalquimista

Thank you all for the great replies, also some of you for the entertainment. I would like to say I wasn't planning on a second date with this particular man. However, my question was in terms of future dates, and if women have found men to be more cheap when first dating or they get worse as time goes on? Money is not an issue for me, it's just the point of courtesy, and I guess I was raised a different way. I agree, I wouldn't want to date a woman either

It's as Mikala said. People tend to be on their best behavior in the beginning. If he's leaving one-dollar tips now, and doesn't even have the decency to be embarrassed when you made up for his cheap tip with yours, imagine what dating him will be like six months down the road. You'll be making up for his cheapness all the time.

Now think of the conversation you had. Or, he had with you as an audience. Then think of what that would translate into in bed.

Yeah. No. The guy is a clueless, self-absorbed clod.

Kinda makes you wonder what kind of patience his ex-wife had, and if he's divorced because she ran out of it.

[John13]

Originally Posted by Free Beer

The lesson here is to date ladies, not feminists.

I'd rather date a feminist. I like women who have their own brain and actually have an opinion.

[itshim]

Originally Posted by John13

I'd rather date a feminist. I like women who have their own brain and actually have an opinion.

true, a real feminist will walk the walk...

they will either offer or insist on paying their own way.

if anything, I have a lot of respect for them for that reason

A real hardcore feminist doesn't cut corners on the "equality" bit.

[calipoppy]

Originally Posted by John13

I'd rather date a feminist. I like women who have their own brain and actually have an opinion.

I have a brain. I have my opinions. I even have my own money...but that is no excuse for men to stop being men. I still expect them to pay.

[NJBest]

Most people my age go by the rule of whoever asked should pay. However, I've never seen not following the convention be a dealbreaker.

[John13]

Originally Posted by xxbabeechick

Would you like the system that you would have to pay for service, regardless of its quality (like most countries)?

You're why cities like SF are making that move.

I hate to see when people aren't bright enough to act in ways that preserve their best interest.

I recently got back from a vacation to SF and I never heard of this.
Is that something that is in the works?

[marilyn220]

Originally Posted by John13

I recently got back from a vacation to SF and I never heard of this.
Is that something that is in the works?

The new minimum wage is $10 an hour in SF.