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Regarding one poster who said I'm trying to make excuses, I'm not. I was explaining what I was feeling at the moment before it happened (overwhelmed and stressed out) but never stated how she deserved it nor that she caused it.
I'm going to just write a final letter to her but not to take me back, just letting her know she didn't deserve that and how I wish her the best. I was thinking of something like this:
I love you and that is why I'm respecting your wish to be left alone as this is my last letter. I cannot believe what I have done. I am truly disgusted with myself and will be for the longest time. The bottom line is you deserve better. What I have done is simply unforgivable. You are an amazing girl and I wish you nothing but happiness. I know in future, someone else will not mess up the amazing opportunity I had. I wish you the best.
I don't mind if I don't get an reply back. Just letting her know this is something I'll regret for a long time.
As much as what you've done sickens me. I can actually respect you for writing that letter. If and only if it is truly because you feel awful and not just because you want her back. I hope for your sake, you learn from this. I understand you are very young, if anything it helps soften the blow. Having said that, I also don't believe that any women should ever have to take that from someone at any age. Everybody makes mistakes, so I am not going to keep beating on you. Understand your mistakes, and moving forward don't EVER do something so degrading again to anyone. Get your anger under control.
Terrible. Whether your sorry or not, a line needs to be drawn on what kind of a behavior a person is willing to endure. I hope for her sake she doesn't go back to you.
A line needs to be drawn for sure, especially considering that it seems to be the goal of some people to get their potential mates to lower their standards as far as they can. Which is pointless, because they don't realize that once you successfully devalue someone so much, you will no longer like them or want them. Unfortunately, because people are lazy and selfish, it's a constant/lifelong battle to keep the opposite gender from devaluing you (even married folks do this to each other). In the case of the OP, his actions crossed the line and can't be forgiven.
A line needs to be drawn for sure, especially considering that it seems to be the goal of some people to get their potential mates to lower their standards as far as they can. Which is pointless, because they don't realize that once you successfully devalue someone so much, you will no longer like them or want them. Unfortunately, because people are lazy and selfish, it's a constant/lifelong battle to keep the opposite gender from devaluing you (even married folks do this to each other). In the case of the OP, his actions crossed the line and can't be forgiven.
Those are two really good points, srjth. A lot of people want the other person to lower their standards and I think partly it's because they want to see how far down the pike the person is willing to go. They will just keep pushing the person because they have shown they have no limit on what they will tolerate. It's true once that happens the other person just keeps getting worse and losing respect.
So, if your dad thought that beating up a stranger in front of you was going to teach you to respect women, clearly that was the wrong strategy.
Instead you learned to physically abuse anyone who you disagree with, and think you can overpower. Law of unintended consequences...
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No, my dad taught that it was never ok to ever hit in anger a woman, elderly or child (not even to retaliate) or act aggressive towards one and if he ever saw me doing that he would report me himself after messing me up. Though I didn't hit her, what I did was still horrible.
The woman didn't go back the guy that he beat up. He served jail time afterwards.
A line needs to be drawn for sure, especially considering that it seems to be the goal of some people to get their potential mates to lower their standards as far as they can. Which is pointless, because they don't realize that once you successfully devalue someone so much, you will no longer like them or want them. Unfortunately, because people are lazy and selfish, it's a constant/lifelong battle to keep the opposite gender from devaluing you (even married folks do this to each other). In the case of the OP, his actions crossed the line and can't be forgiven.
I think they can be forgiven. Almost anything or anyone can be forgiven. It's fine to forgive, the key is not to forget. I've seen people who lose children to murderers forgive the perpetrator who did it. It doesn't neccessarily mean that I think that she should take him back. I don't. That's the key. Forgiveness isn't always for the other person. It helps to set yourself free. So I hope in time she does forgive him, for herself. However, I wouldn't reccommend that she ever go back to him. No matter how sorry he is. I agree with the post before yours. Some things are complete deal breakers.
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