Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Because you want a certain lifestyle for yourself but also want a family - even if it's not best for the family.
It provides a more stable home environment.
How on Earth would you know what's best for other peoples families? You just lost a lot of respect from me.
-1
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dewdrop93
Why are you disappointed with our feedback? Those of us that have children are telling you that we would not do it with out marriage. Why is that disappointing to you? I think the only people that agree with you are also single men with no children. Does that tell you something?
Yup, it tells me you do not know how to read thread posts before you comment and it also tells me you are sexist.
Why are you disappointed with our feedback? Those of us that have children are telling you that we would not do it with out marriage. Why is that disappointing to you? I think the only people that agree with you are also single men with no children. Does that tell you something?
It's disappointing that people who actually have done it think he's out of his mind.
I think it's funny that the only feedback you find constructive is feedback that agrees with you. I'm not telling you that you will never find what you are looking for but I'm telling you WHY those of us that have children would not do so with out being married. I also would never buy a house with someone I wasn't married to. Having a children is the most wonderful experience in the world but it's no walk in the park and I would never embark on this journey with out knowing beyond a doubt that the person by my side was as committed to the journey as I am.
But he stated he does not want to be married. This is an example of why marriage needs to stop being held on this pedestal it really doesn't deserve. The benefits married people get are a form of discrimination against singles, but that is a topic for another thread.
I am single (with no inclination of ever being married again) and I don't see it as discrimination. It's more of an incentive because the government and society (which is what gives those rights) benefits from marriage in many ways.
While it's a debate for another thread, like you say, it's also the reality of today and I doubt it will change that drastically in the OPs lifetime. So he should just look into it... I am not saying get married. I am saying get totally informed of all his legal rights, responsibilities, from all angles etc before making a decision.
How on Earth would you know what's best for other peoples families? You just lost a lot of respect from me.
-1
Yup, it tells me you do not know how to read thread posts before you comment and it also tells me you are sexist.
You can get mad at me and stomp your feet all you want - I know that having a stable home environment is what is best for children. I'm not just making things up.
Sexist? Because I'm pointing something out to you?
I don't really care if you respect me or not - that was never my intent in posting here. You asked a question and you don't like my answers or the answers of any of us that have actually raised a family. That's fine.
You can get mad at me and stomp your feet all you want - I know that having a stable home environment is what is best for children. I'm not just making things up.
Sexist? Because I'm pointing something out to you?
I don't really care if you respect me or not - that was never my intent in posting here. You asked a question and you don't like my answers or the answers of any of us that have actually raised a family. That's fine.
First and foremost, the first person on this thread to say they did not want to get married and was open to having children was indeed a female. So, yes my comment about you not reading this thread before posting and being sexist (clumping my beliefs into something only single males would believe) was indeed sexist.
Secondly, just because you have raised children doesn't mean you have any more power/authority to tell others how to raise their own or how to live their lives.
Lastly, "I know that having a stable home environment is what is best for children. I'm not just making things up" no one is saying an unstable home environment is the best for children. What myself and a few others are saying is that marriage does not equal stability.
And no, I will not "stomp my feet", I will sit in my recliner with my feet up relaxing listening to the birds chirp outside my window on a nice sunny day while I disagree with your comments.
Whether people will admit or not, a father and a mother both have different and individual roles to fulfill on a daily bases in a marriage and raising kids.
When one of those roles is absent or part time, the child suffers.
And no, I will not "stomp my feet", I will sit in my recliner with my feet up relaxing listening to the birds chirp outside my window on a nice sunny day while I disagree with your comments.
Well, you won't be able to do that once you have kids.
Sure I do, my mother raised myself and my older brother, she graduated graduate school while pregnant with me. She is a very strong woman that I learn much from even to this day. I have long lengthy conversations with her about how she did it and I heed her advice.
Was your father around ?
If not, It would be hard to judge why a committed father might want to be married.
Yes, it's possible to raise kids without a commitment of marriage. Is it best... No.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
.