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But then posts like yours can easily be misunderstood as dripping with contempt, since language and tone do matter. Last I checked
Contempt? no, Factual yes. You don't like my tone or suggestions? Ignore them and don't post your personal life on line.
I can be as compassionate as the Mother Theresa, but also as real as Paul Harvey. You don't do anyone any good by playing along with their weaknesses. You direct and offer solutions. They don't want to try and follow that advise? Then they make up an excuses because all throughout life they've been given "Participation Awards" and games that no one kept score, because that would create "low Self-Esteem" Wow, look what we have here, all that generalizing and not building healthy sportsman competitive spirit has worked wonders for several generations.
Coddling and babytalk aren't beneficial in the real world.
Yeah I go out to bars every few weeks or so with friends I just don't have the balls to approach random women even when drunk..
Plus I don't think im attractive enough for a women to want a one night stand with me.
Sometimes I used to wait until the random women were drunk and approached me. Works either way.
I don't get all of the people that say they aren't attractive enough. Go to a mall or any place with a crowd. You will see couples. Some are fat, short, missing limbs, acne, no teeth, poorly dressed, stupid, and whatever else people consider a flaw and THEY HAVE SOMEONE!
Sometimes I used to wait until the random women were drunk and approached me. Works either way.
I don't get all of the people that say they aren't attractive enough. Go to a mall or any place with a crowd. You will see couples. Some are fat, short, missing limbs, acne, no teeth, poorly dressed, stupid, and whatever else people consider a flaw and THEY HAVE SOMEONE!
Amazingly, some possess all of those traits, although if the shortness is due to missing limbs are they really all that, um....never mind. Wonders never cease though.
Sometimes I used to wait until the random women were drunk and approached me. Works either way.
I don't get all of the people that say they aren't attractive enough. Go to a mall or any place with a crowd. You will see couples. Some are fat, short, missing limbs, acne, no teeth, poorly dressed, stupid, and whatever else people consider a flaw and THEY HAVE SOMEONE!
you don't understand them, they want their perfect dream barbie girl
what they don't get is that such a woman would also want a perfect dream ken doll boyfriend, but they aren't that if they look in the mirror
Studies show that the longer you wait, the less likely is it to ever happen.
The hard fact is that adults who do not want to be virgins have to do something proactive about it. They need to identify the barriers and aggressively move them out of the way. No, it's not "fair" but it is a direct consequence of failure to act at an earlier age.
Quote:
Originally Posted by sinsativ
Contempt? no, Factual yes. You don't like my tone or suggestions? Ignore them and don't post your personal life on line.
I can be as compassionate as the Mother Theresa, but also as real as Paul Harvey. You don't do anyone any good by playing along with their weaknesses. You direct and offer solutions. They don't want to try and follow that advise? Then they make up an excuses because all throughout life they've been given "Participation Awards" and games that no one kept score, because that would create "low Self-Esteem" Wow, look what we have here, all that generalizing and not building healthy sportsman competitive spirit has worked wonders for several generations.
Coddling and babytalk aren't beneficial in the real world.
But notice Zen's post above. She can be a little abrupt at times, but even when she is she strives to offer advice people can actually hear (see) without getting defensive. She tailors advice to her audience. You do realize that people who are admitting their struggles to strangers might be a bit sensitive, right? Your approach would likely be more effective with someone who typically functions well with dating, but has hit a slump and is feeling sorry for him or herself. That may not be the case here, though.
But notice Zen's post above. She can be a little abrupt at times, but even when she is she strives to offer advice people can actually hear (see) without getting defensive. She tailors advice to her audience. You do realize that people who are admitting their struggles to strangers might be a bit sensitive, right? Your approach would likely be more effective with someone who typically functions well with dating, but has hit a slump and is feeling sorry for him or herself. That may not be the case here, though.
and per thread title... you'd think someone aged 40 would be more of an adult to know how to interpret and filter advice
stop treating everyone with baby gloves when they aren't babies <-- maybe that's why they can't date anyone? they act too much like an kid, at 40?
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