Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
This story or parts of this story are either fabricated or you are moving so fast with your life that you’re forgetting to implement some common sense in to your actions....it’s hard to label the circumstance as “fishy” when the situation in and of itself doesn’t even sound sensical.
If he is an auditor that audits and closes financial books in other companies, some of them overseas, then he is making VERY good money. Maybe he married this clueless person just for tax purposes?
My son used to do that kind of work for a while and we are talking about high $100 to 200K+ salaries.
When my son was traveling overseas for work, and that happened to be over holidays - his company offered to pay for his wife to accompany him or visit over the weekends if the stay was several weeks long. Even without this offer, he could just take her with him to at least celebrate New Year together. NO ONE in his line of work is working on New Year Day.
So, we are talking about a guy with a high paid, stable job. Therefore his "small bachelor" pad where he can't even live with his new wife doesn't make any sense.
He could have a nice house, condo or at least a bigger apartment somewhere and this "bachelor pad" is just his "sex" and weird double life secret place.
For someone making such kind of money (if this is actually true), he shouldn't be still hunting for an appropriate place to live with his wife, a month after he got married. He should have his place (or any other place) ready for his wife before he got married.
If he is really auditing books, then his high paid job should be easily visible by nice clothes, watches, luxury car, lifestyle and demeanor.
OP, what would you say about that?
From what OP is telling us, she doesn't really know anything about her husband - where he works (did she ever call him at work to his work number?), what is his job, what is he making, and what he is doing after work.
She doesn't know anything about his private life, his friends and his family.
Would an honest person keep all that info from his wife? Isn't that very weird?
There are other questions that beg to be asked: what is the age difference (normally not an issue, but here might be relevant) and how far from each other they are living now (same city? different cities?) - also usually not important, but her husband might choose this setting to be able to live a double life without being worried that OP would find out.
Obviously, OP is intrigued, suspicious and worried about many things but instead of taking matters in her own hands, she spends her time asking questions Internet strangers that can only make wild guesses.
If I were OP, assuming that she has little money and a car - I would check on OP to find out what is REALLY going on:
I would park somewhere near his work late afternoon (just about the time he usually gets off his work) and follow him home to confirm where he really lives and if he lives alone.
Drop unannounced at his work just to say "hi" or with a lunch box in the hand.
That would confirm where he works and what he does.
Check the public records online to see if he was previously married, has any other records or owns a home/condo somewhere. Check on LinkedIn on his profile to confirm his work.
If she can't communicate with her husband, or her questions get dismissed - that would be a good start.
This whole scenario is way too weird and needs to be investigated, one way or the other.
BTW: Most states require both spouses, the officiant, and one or two witnesses, to sign the marriage certificate. Who were the witnesses to sign yours, OP? Yours/his friends or random strangers?
The fact that the O.P. has not answered my question about whether or not her husband is from a different cultural, religious, and/or social background tells me that he most likely is one or all of those three things, which might explain why he's keeping the reality of his marriage away from his family as long as possible.
It makes me wonder if he either has a wife in another state, country, or is supposed to be married to someone from the same background as he. It happens, although usually the guy is dating, rather than marrying a woman without telling her any details (this happened to a few of my college friends with guys whose family of origin were from other countries where arranged marriages are not uncommon. Families will often turn a blind eye to their sons sowing their oats with who they deem to un-marriageable women before they settle down. Marriage to those women, however, is strongly frowned upon).
The fact that the O.P. has not answered my question about whether or not her husband is from a different cultural, religious, and/or social background tells me that he most likely is one or all of those three things, which might explain why he's keeping the reality of his marriage away from his family as long as possible.
It makes me wonder if he either has a wife in another state, country, or is supposed to be married to someone from the same background as he. It happens, although usually the guy is dating, rather than marrying a woman without telling her any details (this happened to a few of my college friends with guys whose family of origin were from other countries where arranged marriages are not uncommon. Families will often turn a blind eye to their sons sowing their oats with who they deem to un-marriageable women before they settle down. Marriage to those women, however, is strongly frowned upon).
What's with the wild conspiracy theories? Born in Kenya or something?
Belle says the guy is an auditor. Accounting degree. My bet is the guy is really introverted with some social/interaction problems. Keeping her away from his parents is simple conflict avoidance since the parents expectations are that he bring home a white collar professional.
I really don't think it's anything exotic or mysterious.
I was heavily involved in her other threads about him, and I remember that he was VERY worried back when they were FWBs about what the people in his life would think about her. To the point that it's the main reason he wouldn't make her his GF.
He's an educated "professional," and she's had a VERY rough upbringing and worked in fast food. It's just good, old-fashioned shallowness and insecurity - on his part.
I remember that he was VERY worried back when they were FWBs about what the people in his life would think about her. To the point that it's the main reason he wouldn't make her his GF.
Here is the quote from her thread about it just over a year ago, when someone asked her what they fought about to end their FWB situation:
Quote:
Originally Posted by belle woods
what everyone in his life would think of me basically. this all came out after a fight. I had a feeling. Thought it was weird i was so important to him but never really met any body in his life.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
