Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
50.5% of the US population is female. Being the case, logic suggests that unless there’s an abnormal amount of lesbians, for every lonely guy there’s a lonely gal. The article didn’t really go into any depth regarding “loneliness”, and imply it is simply inevitable through being single.
I'm not single, not lonely, and not young.
But I think the whole problem is the dating apps themselves. It has gotten to where SOOOOO many people can't do a darn thing without some sort of app! Workout; date; find a restaurant; drive long distances........ and meet someone.
Jeez, Guys! Learn to dance. Learn to converse!! I am so old that I learned to converse by watching Johnny Carson. I did! Then I went out to the bars and practiced. Fell flat on my face, too. Pick yourself up and hit it again.
In the end I learned and spent my career in sales talking to people I did not know. You can learn, too. Start by listening.
Saw this and thought it was interesting. Today also happens to be the day the person I’ve been dating for a bit told me they wanted to be friends because he didn’t think I would like his new work Schedule that he hasn’t even gotten yet, doesn’t make sense. He also got upset when I told him I didn’t want to be friends..very odd anyway this article is pretty interesting & kind of mind boggling considering 90% of the men I’ve dated/talked to only want to hook up or a friends with benefits (that’s just my experience)
I can tell you exactly how this scenario is happening. Now it might on the surface sound like it’s a jab at women but it’s not. It’s a jab at human nature in general. Because if it was the rolls flipped and men were getting all the attention, we would be doing an acting the same way. So I’m pre-facing that with this. Not bashing women here…
What is happening is we live in an era of hook up culture. So you take women who are let’s say average looking, some may be a little higher than that, some may be a little lower, they get online, they put themselves out there for dating or casual connections or whatever it might be. Meanwhile they’re being told how wonderful they are by thousands of men every day all over social media. All the platforms. This creates and overinflated false ego. Again, not bashing women, this is a human thing that would happen to any of us if we found ourselves in this scenario. Then they’re on the dating apps and the high valued men, the guys that are top notch, best looking, athletic, got a great career, probably 6 foot or taller, they wanna go out and play. And they want something easy. They know what their game is, they know where they stand, so they hit up a couple handfuls of these women who are slightly below average or slightly above. But what these women aren’t realizing is these men in this category, are not, I repeat not going to marry these women or take them home to mom or settle down with you. They’re just filling a temporary void and you got the Lucky draw for the short term.
So the woman, is now affectively been ruined For any man that traditionally or historically would fit into her category. An average looking, man. She isn’t even gonna look at that guy anymore. And even if she did, she would probably try and cheat on him and never be happy. She thinks she qualifies for the top 10% of men. Even though she doesn’t unless he just wants to have an evening of sex. That’s the reality of what’s going on. So the women are all holding out for the top 5% to 10% of men but they’re never gonna get, and the average looking guys are getting left completely out of the equation until they just give up. And they don’t even try anymore. If you need proof of this all you have to do is a short study on dating apps. The same 10% of men are getting all of the attention from women. Every average looking man on there gets almost no responses from anyone ever. Lol
We have to all remember that social media is new and its affects on all social aspects of our societies isn’t completely known yet. But this is one aspect you can bet your bottom dollar on that is happening.
I can tell you exactly how this scenario is happening. Now it might on the surface sound like it’s a jab at women but it’s not. It’s a jab at human nature in general. Because if it was the rolls flipped and men were getting all the attention, we would be doing an acting the same way. So I’m pre-facing that with this. Not bashing women here…
What is happening is we live in an era of hook up culture. So you take women who are let’s say average looking, some may be a little higher than that, some may be a little lower, they get online, they put themselves out there for dating or casual connections or whatever it might be. Meanwhile they’re being told how wonderful they are by thousands of men every day all over social media. All the platforms. This creates and overinflated false ego. Again, not bashing women, this is a human thing that would happen to any of us if we found ourselves in this scenario. Then they’re on the dating apps and the high valued men, the guys that are top notch, best looking, athletic, got a great career, probably 6 foot or taller, they wanna go out and play. And they want something easy. They know what their game is, they know where they stand, so they hit up a couple handfuls of these women who are slightly below average or slightly above. But what these women aren’t realizing is these men in this category, are not, I repeat not going to marry these women or take them home to mom or settle down with you. They’re just filling a temporary void and you got the Lucky draw for the short term.
So the woman, is now affectively been ruined For any man that traditionally or historically would fit into her category. An average looking, man. She isn’t even gonna look at that guy anymore. And even if she did, she would probably try and cheat on him and never be happy. She thinks she qualifies for the top 10% of men. Even though she doesn’t unless he just wants to have an evening of sex. That’s the reality of what’s going on. So the women are all holding out for the top 5% to 10% of men but they’re never gonna get, and the average looking guys are getting left completely out of the equation until they just give up. And they don’t even try anymore. If you need proof of this all you have to do is a short study on dating apps. The same 10% of men are getting all of the attention from women. Every average looking man on there gets almost no responses from anyone ever. Lol
We have to all remember that social media is new and its affects on all social aspects of our societies isn’t completely known yet. But this is one aspect you can bet your bottom dollar on that is happening.
This is exactly what I would have typed. I love some NC sweet tea too. But I couldn’t agree more. And yes, it’s not just women bad men good — it’s human nature combined with relatively new technology like you said. It often makes me wonder if people could live more fulfilling lives if we went more towards being virgins until marriage. It would cut out 90% of the crap in modern “dating”. Just look at all the stories we see here of “we hooked up and then things went to crap”.
Last edited by GoAmericaGo; 08-24-2022 at 10:58 PM..
These posts from men continually circle back around to “You women are shooting out of your league to the top 10% of men who are not going to marry you!”
When in reality…the point of contention seems to be that it’s more women who dont want to get married, to anyone any more. And don’t forget how sorry they’re going to be.
A wise man is telling them what they should know and do: They better start giving guys they’re not interested in a shot. At what? Not marrying them either?
You can quit worrying about springing that pre-nup on a woman who has a job and a life, and isn’t after your Dodge Dart.
It’s not that women need to revert. Times have changed. Find a way to accept it and adapt.
These posts from men continually circle back around to “You women are shooting out of your league to the top 10% of men who are not going to marry you!”
When in reality…the point of contention seems to be that it’s more women who dont want to get married, to anyone any more. And don’t forget how sorry they’re going to be.
A wise man is telling them what they should know and do: They better start giving guys they’re not interested in a shot. At what? Not marrying them either?
You can quit worrying about springing that pre-nup on a woman who has a job and a life, and isn’t after your Dodge Dart.
It’s not that women need to revert. Times have changed. Find a way to accept it and adapt.
Yet we also see articles about women that want marriage/commitment, but can’t find “suitable” partners. I recently saw an article about an attractive female who’s mother went as far as buying a billboard that advertised her daughter was looking for the right man.
And as previously stated if men were easily dating and hooking up with the top 10-15% (or even top 40%) of women (however you define that) — marriage rates would likely plummet much lower than they already are. Again, human nature.
These posts from men continually circle back around to “You women are shooting out of your league to the top 10% of men who are not going to marry you!”
When in reality…the point of contention seems to be that it’s more women who dont want to get married, to anyone any more. And don’t forget how sorry they’re going to be.
A wise man is telling them what they should know and do: They better start giving guys they’re not interested in a shot. At what? Not marrying them either?
You can quit worrying about springing that pre-nup on a woman who has a job and a life, and isn’t after your Dodge Dart.
It’s not that women need to revert. Times have changed. Find a way to accept it and adapt.
Well I consider myself a top 10% er. But I’m not here to get my ego stroked so I’m not gonna post my stats. But the few times I’ve been on the dating apps, about 95% of the messages I sent out got responses and I usually didn’t even have to send them out they just came to me. So I’m not complaining, but that doesn’t mean I can’t see what’s going on. It really is legit happening as I described. And no I agree with you, nobody should settle for someone they’re not truly into or attracted to. I’m a firm believer that you can’t force attraction. That’s why I described it as “they’ve been ruined“. Back in the old times before social media, they didn’t have these opportunities.
It’s gotten so bad that many women don’t even mind sharing the top 10%. They don’t care that he’s out screwing her and probably all her friends too.
It’s gotten so bad that many women don’t even mind sharing the top 10%. They don’t care that he’s out screwing her and probably all her friends too.
When you think about it 1 man could easily occupy the mental (and perhaps physical) space of 1 or 2 women per week if he so chooses. That’s 50+ women per year. 10 of those men = 500-1000 women. At some point many of those women will be sharing a man if they know it or not.
And as one male poster said while sharing his divorce story — women have an easier time (perhaps by their nature) of having a support structure and non-romantic relationships to fill that void in their life. Thus, a woman that has heard all the right words (game), been physical with and somewhat emotionally invested in several of these men who had no intentions of being committed — she may indeed decide to be happily single for while. Perhaps giving it another go at a later date. However, her standard for what she finds attractive and deserves may have been lifted pretty high — so she then believes she just needs to find the right one who will be committed. Perhaps that eventually leads to “there’s no decent men out there” after getting burned a few times.
Of course things in life can humble us with age though and start making us possibly open up the dating pool a bit…getting older (I think 35+ we start contemplating getting older), wanting or having a child, wanting to share financial responsibilities, health problems, body changes, etc. I’ve heard some men tell me women over 35-40 are a little less picky…perhaps they’ve been through the dating game and have more life experience.
Last edited by GoAmericaGo; 08-25-2022 at 12:53 AM..
Yet we also see articles about women that want marriage/commitment, but can’t find “suitable” partners. I recently saw an article about an attractive female who’s mother went as far as buying a billboard that advertised her daughter was looking for the right man.
And as previously stated if men were easily dating and hooking up with the top 10-15% (or even top 40%) of women (however you define that) — marriage rates would likely plummet much lower than they already are. Again, human nature.
Guys seem to think women are all being unreasonable when in reality most of us (the ones that do want marriage) just want a halfway decent guy.
Decent guy = not a criminal, not a drug addict, not an abuser, doesn't have ex/kids drama, has a job, can pay his own bills, doesn't cheat or lie, isn't just trying to pump and dump as many women as possible, etc.
But there are just not many decent guys that meet these criteria on the dating market. Settling would mean inviting tons of drama with a partner who does drugs, cheats, acts abusively, lies, gets arrested, can't pay rent, get evicted, commits crimes, gets arrested, or cant stop constantly seeking attention and validation from any woman who will give it to him.
Many single lonely women are like "Just give me a halfway decent man who doesn't make a mess of his life and can be honest and faithful to me." Even that is hard to find.
You think we all want millionaires driving Ferraris and living in some penthouse in Manhattan to be satisfied but most of us are much more realistic and practical than that. Halfway decent men looking for a serious relationship are very rare to find.
Plenty women do settle and get in relationships with subpar men like this but that doesn't make you happy either. Then you complain that women only want bad boys or women must love to be abused or women have broken pickers.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
