[Keeper]

As for 'real friends' having lived in many different states/cities and even a foreign country, I can tell you 'real friends' are hard to find no matter where or who you are gay or straight.

I have found that many times the one person you thought was your real true friend is not the one that shows up in time of need.

[Threestep2]

Originally Posted by Keeper

As for 'real friends' having lived in many different states/cities and even a foreign country, I can tell you 'real friends' are hard to find no matter where or who you are gay or straight.

I have found that many times the one person you thought was your real true friend is not the one that shows up in time of need.

And you never know who is a real friend until a crisis hits.

[cpg35223]

Originally Posted by Keeper

Everyone is entitled to their opinions and while we may not always agree, it is OK for ppl not to like living in a certain city/town.
I hope the members here are just trying to offer advice or their thoughts as to what the problem might be.

You may want to make a new thread about what is great about a certain city/area.

I think it is perfectly appropriate to respond to the Heathanoah's points, especially when she is making assertions that are completely contrary to what I've experienced here as a newcomer. After all, if Heathanoah is going to rattle on about how unfriendly Birmingham is and how the Southside (a really, really great place to live, BTW), is nothing more than a collection of crack houses, dangerous neighborhoods, and unwelcoming people then we have a right to respond--especially since the overall personality of the area is the entire point of the thread.

[heathanoah]

Originally Posted by cpg35223

I think it is perfectly appropriate to respond to the Heathanoah's points, especially when she is making assertions that are completely contrary to what I've experienced here as a newcomer. After all, if Heathanoah is going to rattle on about how unfriendly Birmingham is and how the Southside (a really, really great place to live, BTW), is nothing more than a collection of crack houses, dangerous neighborhoods, and unwelcoming people then we have a right to respond--especially since the overall personality of the area is the entire point of the thread.

It's fine for people to have opinions, but I think Keeper's point is that there is no need to take to to a nasty level, which is what some members have chosen to do. I have NEVER made any assertions that Southside is a horrible, drug infested place I was just putting it out there that Southside has an attraction (especially to young people) but newcomers should be aware that it's not as safe as it may look on the outside. I see that you live in MOUNTAIN BROOK so consider yourself blessed Moderator cut: .. What works for some of us doesn't work for us all and I should be able to state my experiences and opinions on here without people taking it to a nasty level-PERIOD.

[heathanoah]

Originally Posted by denverian

The sad thing is, when you're gay, you have to carefully pick where you live. As a mixed-race gay couple with two sons, we have to be. We live in a wonderful, accepting neighborhood where we're treated as equals and don't have to worry about our kids being attacked for having two dads.

Yeah, as you can tell from the way this thread has advanced, many people don't understand. As I mentioned in my earlier thread, my partner was gay-bashed right on our front porch. Just for kissing me. She had a concussion, 15 staples in her head and has had a lot of psychological problems since the attack. We're trying to find the right place to call home and I am really happy for you guys that you have found your niche! Especially with kids!

[heathanoah]

Originally Posted by Keeper

Everyone is entitled to their opinions and while we may not always agree, it is OK for ppl not to like living in a certain city/town.
I hope the members here are just trying to offer advice or their thoughts as to what the problem might be.

You may want to make a new thread about what is great about a certain city/area.

Yeah, since when is it cool to just COME DOWN on someone in this type of situation? I am really new to this group, but I never expected to be singled out and told by perfect strangers what I should do with my life and how I should act! This all started with me trying to empathize with someone who is having a difficult time. I totally know how it feels to hate where you live and like you said, THAT'S OK! Sheesh!

[Keeper]

Originally Posted by cpg35223

I think it is perfectly appropriate to respond to the Heathanoah's points, especially when she is making assertions that are completely contrary to what I've experienced here as a newcomer. After all, if Heathanoah is going to rattle on about how unfriendly Birmingham is and how the Southside (a really, really great place to live, BTW), is nothing more than a collection of crack houses, dangerous neighborhoods, and unwelcoming people then we have a right to respond--especially since the overall personality of the area is the entire point of the thread.

Heathano was stating what happened to her.. personally. You have the right to say you have found the area to be nice, safe and friendly.

It is appropriate to respond to the area but it is not OK to attack anyone verbally based on their sexual orientation. I don't want this thread to become anything other than a discussion about the area.

Some ppl find Arab, unfriendly.. I do not. I don't live their lives. I have not experienced what they have experienced. One place is not for everyone.. if it were we would all be in ONE big city..

[cpg35223]

Originally Posted by heathanoah

I see that you live in MOUNTAIN BROOK so consider yourself blessed .

We just moved to Mountain Brook in late 2006. Before that we lived in Avondale for eight years. Before that, off Highland Avenue. Before that, the LaSalle Apartment across from Highlands Bar & Grille for three years. What's more, the bulk of our friends continue to live down that way in places such as Crestwood, Avondale, Forest Park, Highland Park, Redmont, and behind UAB. In fact, the only reason we moved was so we wouldn't pay to put three kids through private schools. The moment my youngest has his diploma in about 8 years, we're moving right back down into your neighborhood.

So, yeah, I know pretty much every nook and cranny of Southside--

[southernnaturelover]

Originally Posted by heathanoah

Yeah, as you can tell from the way this thread has advanced, many people don't understand. As I mentioned in my earlier thread, my partner was gay-bashed right on our front porch. Just for kissing me. She had a concussion, 15 staples in her head and has had a lot of psychological problems since the attack. We're trying to find the right place to call home and I am really happy for you guys that you have found your niche! Especially with kids!

Heathanoah, I have lived in Alabama all my life, and I am a gay man. Neither my partner nor I have ever experienced a threat from someone because of it, and we live in a small town. Sure, we don't kiss standing in the front yard, but we are not the type to do that anyways. If we were to display public affection I'm sure there may be some people who would comment, but that's anywhere you go, in any state. Both Pensacola,FL and Mobile have gay populations that never seem to have any problems, but I find it hard to believe south AL could be very much different from north AL. I just make sure to stand up for myself just like everyone else. If anyone were to threaten me on my property, well, they'd get what they're asking for. Even though I'm gay, I still consider myself quite conservative, so maybe that's why I fit in so well.

[MonaLisaVito]

Originally Posted by dentaigirl10

I dont live in arab I live in madison but I couldnt agree with you more. We are moving . I moved here from Michigan and I have never meet such rude,unsocialble people in my life I hate it here we are move back up north were the people are friendly and social. Oh and your right no one can drive here.

Dentaigirl, I'm so sad to hear this!!!!! Are you really moving back. I'm going to email you in a few minutes.


I moved to Alabama last year from Michigan also. I'm in a small town just West of Arab. I've actually met Keeper in person a few months ago and she is as sweet as can be.

Anyway, I'm sorry to hear that people are having a hard time here. It is a bit of a change and takes some getting use to but I have actually met a lot of great people down here and I actually Love it down here. Everyone has been nothing but friendly here in my small town and surrounding areas. I go to Huntsville quite a bit and have met other woman also that are not from here that live in Huntsville area.

The biggest thing for me to get use to here is that not everyone drinks beer or alcohol!!!! Up North it's such common courtesy when offering someone a beverage to include beer or wine as part of the choices!! LOL

Originally Posted by Snapp2it

When we lived in south Alabama my husband would send me to the store 10 minutes away and I would be gone for at least an hour because I would always run into people and have to stop and chat with them but that hasn't happened here in the whole 2 years we have been here. .

I am shocked about this quote above. I live about 20 minutes from you and every where I go takes 2 hours cuz everyone talks everywhere I go. Please send me a DM if you would like to talk. I'm from out of town also.