[adamz]

Originally Posted by nep321

I'm having very little luck finding a job away from here. I had a phone interview scheduled with a great company in Buffalo, but they ended up telling me they had to reschedule it, but never actually did. So I think they are quietly dismissing me, which sucks really bad, because the job seemed like a perfect match for me and I really like WNY. Maybe they'll call me back on Monday, but I doubt it.

In the meantime, the rental market here in lower FFC is abysmal for anything $1,700 or less, that includes a washer/dryer. There's almost.....nothing on the market, and I'm trapped in this hellhole apartment on a VERY loud busy 4-lane road and I can hear the girl above me's iPhone vibrating with every text she receives. It' horrible. I seriously feel like my life ended ever since I moved down to FFC and I'm in a deep, dark hole and have to climb out, but there are no ladders coming down to help me out. Everyday I hate myself for even looking for jobs here and moving here last year and sometimes I just want to cry. And I seriously don't see a light at the end of this tunnel.

I still haven't forgotten what life was like pre-FFC. Pleasant paced, purchasing power, middle class, normal. I had never envisioned that I would be living in this situation, two years ago. In 2012, I quit my job, packed up and fled to find a place that would work better for me, but instead I got the worst nightmare I could possibly imagine. And my biggest fear now is that I will be stuck here for many years to come, because I'm at the mercy of other employers wanting to hire me outside of FFC.

I seriously feel like almost everyone here is richer than me and able to afford nice housing, and here I am at the age of 30 back to square one living in a small crappy apartment like a 22 year old all over again, with homeownership out of reach in the near future.

My career is also being degraded because the job I currently have is not challenging and very paraprofessional-like. I don't see promotion, increase or advancement other than typical 3% inflationary raises.

I ruined my life and this is the new normal for me now. I put it upon myself. A major setback economically and career wise. I leave my blinds shut 24/7 because I can't stand to see the outside view of FFC highways, buildings and traffic. I never go to the city and hate hearing about it. I quit going to gay bars because it's the same people over and over again, and nobody is interested in me unless they're old, fat or ethnic.

It's the new normal for me now. Honestly, I'd rather be dead than live in this dreadful place, because I can't see a single pro to living here. I'm just existing and going through the motions.

NEP, read what you wrote. No matter where you go, you will feel similarly, because the problem is not your environment, it's your ATTITUDE.

You wrote that you "tried therapy", but were told that you need to learn to relax and enjoy yourself. Think about that- if you could relax and enjoy yourself,you'd be happy now. If you can't, you won't be happy anywhere.

Find a professional who can work with you to teach you how to be happy.

[CTartist&musician]

Originally Posted by nep321

It's hard to accept what I have now when I had so much more when I lived in Hartford County. So much more purchasing power, more laid back lifestyle, etc. Living in FFC now is not a step up from the standard of living I had previously. It's a step down from the quality of life that I had already.

NEP,

Is there any way you can go back and live with your parents or friends until you find a new job up in the Hartford area? After reading your posts in the many different threads it seems like you were the happiest in the Hartford area. Frankly at this point I can't wait to get of of Fairfield County to a slower paced life style with less "keeping up with the Jonses" and I was born here. I agree with what you are saying about Fairfield County being a tough place for young adults.

I know you are in finance but I can't remember exactly what you do. It seems like your skills would be transferable to the Hartford area. It also might not hurt to see a Life Coach or therapist. They might help give you some perspective on what you are going through. I know you are seeing the glass half full right now (or maybe empty) but when I read your posts I see the positives in you and I see someone who has a glass that can be overflowing. A Life Coach or an appropriate therapist will help you see those things too.

[dazzleman]

This thread is comedy at this point.

[nep321]

Yeah. Well at this point I am seriously considering moving with no job lined up again. I'll wait until March to get my $15k bonus, then give my notice to my landlord and make the move. But I'm worried that if I do that I will become unemployable, because I already left my last job with no job lined up in an attempt to do the same thing. I have enough savings to buy a home in a normal place that's not FFC. But I'm scared to blow through it and set myself back again.

[UconnHusky1]

Originally Posted by CTartist&musician

NEP,

Is there any way you can go back and live with your parents or friends until you find a new job up in the Hartford area?

I don't think the OP has friends, but if he does god bless them

[jp03]

Originally Posted by nep321

Yeah. Well at this point I am seriously considering moving with no job lined up again. I'll wait until March to get my $15k bonus, then give my notice to my landlord and make the move. But I'm worried that if I do that I will become unemployable, because I already left my last job with no job lined up in an attempt to do the same thing. I have enough savings to buy a home in a normal place that's not FFC. But I'm scared to blow through it and set myself back again.

Well I'm glad for you that WNY move fizzled.. you would have been a miserable train wreck by March up there.

Its ironic..I don't think you are looking for guidance in here. You are looking for a shoulder to cry on.


For what its worth, your best bet is to move back to the Hartford area.

[whome224]

Originally Posted by nep321

I can literally hear everything through the walls and ceiling. Full conversations, iPhones vibrating, footsteps, music, everything.

I lived in the city and you definitely can't hear everything unless you're in a really awful building. I highly doubt you can hear your neighbors in their bathroom, for instance.

[jp03]

Originally Posted by bobtn

OP, You are lamenting not getting a Buffalo job when you wrote this post below. You aren't happy, and you constantly have the itch to move, change jobs, etc. Do some soul-searching. It isn't location or career trajectories which make you unhappy. If it were, given all your chess moves concerning each, at some point, you would have been happy. When you were upstate, you wrote just as tragically about the urge to leave there as FFC.



01-22-2012, 02:19 PM
[SIZE=5]nep321[/SIZE]
Senior Member
befriend





Every year, between around November through April, I am always clamoring to leave CT, due to the dreadful, unbearable cold temperatures and snow that comes along with it. This winter is no exception. I gotta admit, this past week really sucked bigtime having to brush off snow from my car and deal with messy snow conditions. It was truly awful. But it's times like these that make me want to leave CT for good. Hibernating for 6 months really, really sucks, and I'm not interested in winter outdoor activities at all.

Does anyone else feel this way? IMO the winter is one of the worst features of CT, and a major reason to move OUT!

My ideal type of place with regard to weather pattern would be 50's and 60's at the absolute coldest during the winter (daily high temps). I hate wearing jackets, bigtime. And to make matters even more depressing in CT, I noticed that it gets dark much earlier than it does in the southern U.S. For example, today, in Hartford, the sunset time is 4:52 PM, but in Atlanta it is 5:58! They get an extra hour and 6 minutes of daylight. WTF?!

CT weather makes me miserable, and after 27 years of living in this type of climate, I simply cannot embrace it, and likely never will. The only thing literally keeping me in this state is nearby family members who also live here.

If you are that miserable here and you are staying only for family thats just ridiculous... just a terrible way to go through life. Take a chance and move..so ironic I think the weather here is divine. Never gets boring. ..take a walk today its crisp, clean and clear..you don't have to be a hermit in this weather.

Edit : And its so funny how all the cold weather haters ignore the fact they will be sweating their asses off in the south 5 months a year in summer. What do you think you do in the south in summer? You sit in a hot pool or stay inside...thats what you do Its all relative.

[davwve]

There are plenty of accounting positions posted on recruiter's websites for Hartford. Your recruiter can't get you any face time for these? Also, since you're from Granby you should know acquaintances from school that work at the various large corps downtown that can either forward your their internal postings or pass your resume along.

[nep321]

Originally Posted by davwve

There are plenty of accounting positions posted on recruiter's websites for Hartford. Your recruiter can't get you any face time for these? Also, since you're from Granby you should know acquaintances from school that work at the various large corps downtown that can either forward your their internal postings or pass your resume along.

I can't get any accounting job. It has to be a tax accounting job, because that's what my career has pigeon holed me in now. And it must be in private industry (not public accounting with clients). I applied to 8 jobs in the Hartford area and had no luck.

I hope the Buffalo one works out because it's a perfect fit for my career.

I don't think the climate of WNY would bother me. It's not much different than CT. They get powdery light fluffy snow. We get the heavy wet crap. And they get more days of sunshine between June and September than any other place in the Northeast. Summers in CT are oppressive compared to WNY.

I just think WNY would be great for me. It's 5-6 hours of a drive to family in CT. No need for hopping on a plane. Leans liberal with politics. Has a sizeable gay population. LOW cost of living. Not too urban, not too rural. And people are friendly. Four seasons are good, too, even if winter is a bit longer and harsher. Big deal. I've been there a few times and really liked it. Plus, I was born in Plattsburgh, NY.

I'm afraid of moving cold turkey with no job lined up again, at the age of 30. Ain't gonna happen. Unless maybe I accumulate like $80 - 100K in the bank, that way I'll have enough to live off for a year with no job AND purchase a nice house.

I just talked with my mommy for 3 hours on the phone about my dire situation and about how I'm a victim of income inequality in FFC. How the rents and housing prices just keep rising, but middle class people like me have stagnant wages and can't afford nice places. My god, I hope Dannel passes legislation next year to provide government assistance to households in lower FFC making less than $100K. I could sure use some financial help.