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I had this conversation with my friend at work today and she agrees with me. I will contribute some, but the majority of the money will come from the kids in the form of scholarships, work study, and loans. Post secondary education is still optional, and it is for the purpose of enriching them. I will not put a lien on our house or put ourselves into megadebt trying to finance their education. The way I see it, it's all about the hard work, personal responsibility and entering the grown up world. Hard work means that you bust your butt so that you qualify for the many scholarships that are out there (i know because NYU offered me a partial back in '93). It also means that you work the Mcminimum wage jobs that I had to deal with as well. And yes, loans. In a perfect world, where we'd be making beaucoup money, we'd let our children enter the adult world totally debt free, and things arrive in neat little packages. But in my world, my husband and I try are darndest to make sure our children are well provided for from conception to graduation and it is not unreasonable for us to expect our children to pick up some of the load when they are of age.
I wonder if you bothered to read many of the posts here before responding. If you had, perhaps you'd have taken a look at what I've previously written. The gist of is that if tuition ranges between $3500 a year and $7000 per year and a young person can only earn $4000 a summer (if he is employed full time at an unskilled job) that he/she cannot afford to pay for college.
You can preach "personal responsibility" and "character-building" until your bloody blue-in-the-face. It doesn't change the fact that this attitude will result in a lot of capable young people not attending college--and certainly not earning a degree.
Honestly, I think I'd have more respect for a parent who just came out and said "I don't believe in college, so therefore I'm going to provide support to my children so that they can attend". Instead, we get all this sanctimonious BS rhetoric about hordes of scholarships that are allegedly available that no one looks into. Hey, if you want to save your money for a new car every two years or so that you can retire by age 60, that's your business. Just don't try to sell your decision as being motivated by what's in the best interest of your kids. Its not.
I have a son who graduated with a B+ average from high school and a decent, but not stellar ACT score. Believe me, there are no scholarships available. We checked it out. I even looked into the possibility of one because he was an Eagle Scout. Such scholarships exist, but there are so many eagle scouts that they are very competitive too. I'm sure some parents would be happy to tell him "Oh well....life's tough...you can find career satisfaction cutting hair or something like that".
I suppose I am such a PITA about this because I blame we adults for the fact that tuition has climbed so high that its totally out of reach for young people. Tuition at colleges has increased at 350% higher than the overall rate of inflation. Its why I paid $350 a semester to go to school and my son's tuition for that same semester 30 years later is a whopping $3,500. Young people weren't on watch when that happened. We were....Now, we have a class of parents that not only stood by and did nothing while that occurred, but now want to abdicate their responsibilities to provide some assistance to their children as well.
Again, I'll say if you can't afford to help its one thing. If you can afford to help and make a decision not too, you'll always be a second class parent in my book.
No offense but I have to call BS on this one. I'm an RN and worked my way through just like the other poster. Now if you are a student that has to work hard for B's then maybe not. If you are intelligent then it can be done. I worked 11-7 M-F and 7p-7a Sat and Sun. I owe no money for my RN and my GPA was good enough for ARNP admission soo....
Thank you!!! I opted not to reply further to that poster because she had an answer for everything and her answers were simply that you cannot work and go to college. What nonsense!!!! Where there's a will, there's a way. You and I did it as did many, many others!
I wonder if you bothered to read many of the posts here before responding. If you had, perhaps you'd have taken a look at what I've previously written. The gist of is that if tuition ranges between $3500 a year and $7000 per year and a young person can only earn $4000 a summer (if he is employed full time at an unskilled job) that he/she cannot afford to pay for college.
You can preach "personal responsibility" and "character-building" until your bloody blue-in-the-face. It doesn't change the fact that this attitude will result in a lot of capable young people not attending college--and certainly not earning a degree.
Honestly, I think I'd have more respect for a parent who just came out and said "I don't believe in college, so therefore I'm going to provide support to my children so that they can attend". Instead, we get all this sanctimonious BS rhetoric about hordes of scholarships that are allegedly available that no one looks into. Hey, if you want to save your money for a new car every two years or so that you can retire by age 60, that's your business. Just don't try to sell your decision as being motivated by what's in the best interest of your kids. Its not.
I have a son who graduated with a B+ average from high school and a decent, but not stellar ACT score. Believe me, there are no scholarships available. We checked it out. I even looked into the possibility of one because he was an Eagle Scout. Such scholarships exist, but there are so many eagle scouts that they are very competitive too. I'm sure some parents would be happy to tell him "Oh well....life's tough...you can find career satisfaction cutting hair or something like that".
I suppose I am such a PITA about this because I blame we adults for the fact that tuition has climbed so high that its totally out of reach for young people. Tuition at colleges has increased at 350% higher than the overall rate of inflation. Its why I paid $350 a semester to go to school and my son's tuition for that same semester 30 years later is a whopping $3,500. Young people weren't on watch when that happened. We were....Now, we have a class of parents that not only stood by and did nothing while that occurred, but now want to abdicate their responsibilities to provide some assistance to their children as well.
Again, I'll say if you can't afford to help its one thing. If you can afford to help and make a decision not too, you'll always be a second class parent in my book.
No, I freely admit that I did not wade through all 16 pages and noticed your post. Sorry, I didn't care to. But I did read some. And I added my opinion, and so what? Is that not what this topic is for, or is someone supposed to read through 16 pages of posts, notice yours and then comment? Did I force others to feel the same way that I do? No, I don't think so. If someone like me, and my viewpoint, fills you with indignation, then really, that's tough. Likewise, I could care less that you view me as a "second class parent" (in bold font no less), as you are some dude on the internet who has little impact in our lives. I said that I would contribute some, but that's it -- I am not footing three quarters of the bill. What parents choose to do with their money is their own darn business, not yours. Parents are not obligated, morally or otherwise to put their children through college. I think a child should definitely contribute a good part to their post secondary education. As for scholarships, like I said before, there are those that are available for talent, ethnicity, and other factors. They don't cover everything, but they sure can help. I'm sure it was difficult to get one back in 93 too.
BTW, not like it matters, but I ended up being a college drop out and took up a vocation instead. Better payoff in my opinion, but I would support whatever my daughters choose to do.
More than parents paying or not paying for their children to go to college, the biggest issue is student loans. Young people should be shown there are other options than going into massive debt to attend school. It's just become so easy for an 18 year old to take out thousands of dollars a year in loans, and then graduate with that debt hanging over them. I've heard the average college student in the US graduates with about $25,000 in student loan debt, and another $5,000 in credit card debt. And of course we all hear the horror stories of people having six figures in student loan debt, and they're barely making $30,000 a year because of the economy or they got a rather useless degree.
^Agreed. $20k is actually a modest amount of student loan debt....IF you are walking away from school with a degree in something that you can earn a decent income off of.
It seems that nobody is there in the financial aid system to tell these kids about the pitfalls of racking up $100k+ in debt in order to get a degree in education. Doesn't anybody tell them that teachers don't make that much money? (substitute any other mediocre paid degreed professions)
I think a parent would serve their child far better with some career planning. Show then what different careers pay and go into what their work days are like, arrange a shadow day with a friend or colleague. I met so many kids in college with majors and they had no idea what they would be doing after graduation. I had a classmate that "hated kids" said it all the time. His major? Elementary education. He had obviously never made the connection. I knew others who had no idea that you could even get degrees from a cc or make money with a vo-tech education. My hubby had 40k in debt with a BS and I earned double what he did after having done a one year nursing program at the vo-tech. My cost (1994) about $1,000. Its about informed choices.
I think a parent would serve their child far better with some career planning. Show then what different careers pay and go into what their work days are like, arrange a shadow day with a friend or colleague. I met so many kids in college with majors and they had no idea what they would be doing after graduation. I had a classmate that "hated kids" said it all the time. His major? Elementary education. He had obviously never made the connection. I knew others who had no idea that you could even get degrees from a cc or make money with a vo-tech education. My hubby had 40k in debt with a BS and I earned double what he did after having done a one year nursing program at the vo-tech. My cost (1994) about $1,000. Its about informed choices.
Whoa! You are making way too much sense here Purple Princess!
Who do you think you are bringing common sense to the internet?
I think a parent would serve their child far better with some career planning. Show then what different careers pay and go into what their work days are like, arrange a shadow day with a friend or colleague. I met so many kids in college with majors and they had no idea what they would be doing after graduation. I had a classmate that "hated kids" said it all the time. His major? Elementary education. He had obviously never made the connection. I knew others who had no idea that you could even get degrees from a cc or make money with a vo-tech education. My hubby had 40k in debt with a BS and I earned double what he did after having done a one year nursing program at the vo-tech. My cost (1994) about $1,000. Its about informed choices.
So you are an LPN?
IMO, college is not just about vocational training. But we've been down that road before here on this forum.
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(Good job!)
