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Lol, I had a similar response when discussing the civility and effectiveness of the Work and Employment forum. The poster asked, “why do you care what anybody here thinks?” And I was like, “because it’s an advice forum?”
Exactly, and here, is all a lot of people have got.
Welcome to the internet! I do frequently see someone take something a way that wasn't intended. Without someone's voice, it can be easy to take something the wrong way. There's no tone, no body language, no hand gestures, etc.
Many people have known each other for years. Not known each other in person. They know each on here. There are some that have met in person. When I was looking to relocate, I messaged a guy I consider to the be mayor of the area I was moving to and he had some great advice for me. I've known him on here for years. I've never met him in person.
Welcome to the internet! I do frequently see someone take something a way that wasn't intended. Without someone's voice, it can be easy to take something the wrong way. There's no tone, no body language, no hand gestures, etc.
Many people have known each other for years. Not known each other in person. They know each on here. There are some that have met in person. When I was looking to relocate, I messaged a guy I consider to the be mayor of the area I was moving to and he had some great advice for me. I've known him on here for years. I've never met him in person.
Interestingly enough, in real life, face to face, I don't have the correct body language, or tone of voice. Just imagine that.
Why do people think that honesty entails being a jerk?
I appreciate your comment, but I don’t agree with your assessment.
There, just like that. I was honest with you without tearing you down or tooting my own horn. But this probably won’t get repped, because it wasn’t snarky enough to trigger someone else’s emotional response.
Yea you can be honest without being a jerk. But the example you gave is a bit over the the top. Really - who is going to speak like that on the forums?
Yea you can be honest without being a jerk. But the example you gave is a bit over the the top. Really - who is going to speak like that on the forums?
I just did.
Whenever I reply to an OP with a legitimate question or concern, I always respond in a manner that resembles how I’d respond if my name and reputation were on the line.
I don't know who you are talking about specifically - but half the traits you mention might also be characterized as just honesty. And in today's language-policing PC world, honesty is refreshing enough to get repped.
If we were brutally and flintily honest with ourselves, most of us would find the adjectives in the Original Posting to at least somewhat fit our own selves; such is the curse of being human. What does, I think, happen all too often, is that accumulation of accolades grants us a smugness and feeling of invincibility, wherein some foible or blunder on the part of another, feels like it would be excusable for us. Unfortunately, the realization of our mistakes is rarely gradual or incremental. It happens suddenly, violently, and all too late.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Left-handed
I guess my main point in all of this is that it seems like some of the most unsavory behaviors are rewarded here, on this forum, far more than we see them rewarded in real life.
It’s the veil of anonymity. Strong personal feeling is difficult to long retain, when there’s no voice or face or name against which to direct said feeling. But the titillation and piquancy of a provocative statement can be rewarded, regardless of its authorship.
Quote:
Originally Posted by jencam
Another thing is watch how short a thread is when there is no drama. When there is drama it goes on and on even if the OP bails due to it!
Good point. We should remember, that this site is owned by a for-profit company. Presumably there is some advertising revenue or other source of profit, contingent upon page-views or length of threads or something like that. Whether utter rubbish or the most profound wisdom, whatever happens to keep a discussion going, is ultimately a good thing, from the aspect of eyeballs-on-screen.
If you find yourself being offended often by a particular member, you can always take advantage of the 'Ignore' feature.
Yes. If someone's comments upset you, do use the ignore. If the comment is offensive or rude, you can report it.
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