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Maybe I need to move, because pretty much every heterosexual single eligible male (young or old, but mostly older) in these parts is going to be expecting sex sooner or later if you go out with them, (i.e., agree to date them). This is why it's rather difficult for me to even navigate the dating pool here, because men expecting sex and women offering sex in return for a kindness rendered? I consider that prostitution. I don't see that as a viable life choice for myself. So while I'm not a bad looking sort, fit, reasonably attractive, employed church-going, connected to my community, I sit home on Saturday nights with my disappointment and my ideals.
Prostitution is a bit harsh. I agree (like I think I mentioned in a previous post in here) that generally, sex is something people "expect" to be on the table when you're dating. That expectation will vary. They could expect it immediately, they could expect it whenever it naturally feels right or after you've gotten to know each other a little bit, they could expect it only once you've both been tested for STIs, they could expect it after an engagement is on or once you're married.
The only time I think it becomes a problem is if you're not on the same page about when it "should" happen or when you want it to and if you feel to do it when you're not comfortable. If you're not interested in having sex at all ever, then I would think being single for a little while might be inevitable until you meet someone who also doesn't want to have sex.
But if it's just a matter of not wanting to feel like you're obligated to hand sex over because you said yes to going out on a date, that's more about finding the right person and at least giving someone a chance before assuming they'll place that kind of pressure on you or give you an ultimatum right out of the gate.
I don't understand the rep I got for my post. If I'm going to a mechanic and paying him for services, why would he tell me, "I'm not taking you to dinner?"
In my honest opinion, some women need to get over themselves. When I approach a woman to talk to her, I just want to talk and I'm only being friendly. I never bring up sex at all. I offered to help a woman with a paper in my college class she accepted my help. She then said "I won't have sex with you." I looked at her with a wtf look. I said "I'm just being friendly to you and helping you, get over yourself." Seriously, why do most women think this way? Did it ever occur that some men are just being friendly to you? When I'm being friendly to a woman, that's it.
You should of come back with That's a relief. I don't wanna have sex with you either. Just give me a BJ and were good.
Women just assume a guy wants to help and then help get her panties off. I've had some instances like that and When I offer to help and get that no because you'll want something in return I usually say something like you're right I have nothing better to do than to try and seduce you by changing your fan or adding some lights. If it makes you feel better I charge $50 a hour but ill do 60 because you're you. They get the point that I'm just trying to help them no strings attached. And if they don't that's their problem.
In your opinion, if a woman does the same as the bolded, can a guy assume she wants him sexually ?
All I'm saying is that when a man does it, he does it with some intention in mind. I've heard male comedians quip that men were highly simple creatures, not as complex as women are led to believe. If you make them a sandwich and provide some good lovin' they are completely content. This seems to indicate that food and sex are men's two main motivations. So if a guy sees a woman from across a room and crosses the room to meet her, he's looking for a bite of her sandwich or.......?
Did it ever occur to you that both the man and the woman both want to have sex with each other and really enjoy it? That is isn't a transaction of expectation and reward for anything at all?
Did it ever occur to you that women (just like men) have types they are attracted to and types they are not attracted to. And if there is no attraction, the sex has no business happening (for "being nice" or "feeling obligated") Did it ever occur to you that some men will go as far as attempting to "trick" a woman into going out with him, and when she declares there's no spark, they feel as though they've been cheated because they've been "nice"? What wasn't mentioned that the types of attitudes towards women I am describing were around in high school, and quite a few men still subscribe to them....the idea that a woman owes them something for being "nice".
NOT TRUE, cripes, ALL women can and do get attention for sex only or long term relationships and (gasp) even get married whether they are considered "attractive to very attractive" by the entire planet or not.
An unattractive woman would like it if they get a man to look at them once in a while lol.
Looking at or checking out women is NOT the same as wanting to have sex with them. An awful lot of men have never had sex with a woman half as attractive, and can't even imagine having sex with a woman as attractive as the one they are checking out. For these men it's eye candy and nothing more.
It depends on what is in his mind when checking her out though. It depends on what his intentions are eventually.
Why do women always assume you are trying to have sex with them?
A: I don't always think men are trying to have sex with me. Sometimes I think they are trying to fix my window or move my furniture and then have sex with me.
I don't think that's *always* the case. However, the times I have been in the dating scene, yes, that is the case a lot of the time. That isn't to say sex wasn't ever mutually desired. It just wasn't something I was feelin' with every guy I went out with.
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