Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Whining and whiner-bashing aside, I think there is some damn good advice for guys like OP on this forum.
This might sound kind of funny. But I think if this place were around and the internet was faster when I was younger, it would have helped me a lot in terms of how NOT to go about trying to get women. It makes a big difference.
There's guys here who have been through it and know what not to do to preserve your sanity.
OP, I firmly believe getting a woman will help you a lot, and if you listen to some of what has been said here by the right people, it would put you on the right track.
Do you also have a collection of ALL the posts in which women said they do date short guys, short guys are cool, etc. etc. ? And what about these posts?
You can probably count them on one hand by the same three or four posters
You can probably count them on one hand by the same three or four posters
Wow, it looks like we have a clairvoyant among us! That's some crystal ball!
So what if they're only a handful of posters? It means there ARE women out there who don't mind short guys. And as I recall, You're not even "short", you're average (around 5'8", right? 5'9?) Lots of women only like blond guys. A lot of women don't like red-haired guys, but do you see them starting whiner threads?
Dig it:
Quote:
Originally Posted by AdaptAndOvercome;
I am a short man. However, I managed to be Army Special Operation. I managed to be an amazing engineer. I managed to be an amazing husband. My height does not define me in any way. I rise above the bs that people assign to me, and I become great.
THIS is your challenge! If a 5'4 black guy can rise above his circumstance, it should be a cakewalk for you.
Wow, it looks like we have a clairvoyant among us! That's some crystal ball!
So what if they're only a handful of posters? It means there ARE women out there who don't mind short guys. And as I recall, You're not even "short", you're average (around 5'8", right? 5'9?) Lots of women only like blond guys. A lot of women don't like red-haired guys, but do you see them starting whiner threads?
Dig it:
THIS is your challenge! If a 5'4 black guy can rise above his circumstance, it should be a cakewalk for you.
Nah im only five seven and a half..and hair color is not as big a deal as height
Nah im only five seven and a half..and hair color is not as big a deal as height
OMG, you're a midget! Only 5'7-1/2 instead of 5'8"?? Your life is OVER! You're short a half inch! There is NO HOPE!
(SARCASM!)
I know a ton of guys who are 5'7" and 5'8". They're all married. Well, 2 aren't, but they have been married, and are divorced. Funny, nobody ever told them they were short. To this day, I don't think they have any idea that they're considered "short". It seems you've been working pretty hard to brainwash yourself.
Just in case you missed the message:
Quote:
Originally Posted by AdaptAndOvercome;
My height does not define me in any way. I rise above the bs that people assign to me, and I become great.
For people like me who have trouble attracting the opposite sex and lack confidence and can be insecure and get in a negative rut about women these worst fears and stereotypes about women get amplified in my head sometimes from what i read..
Its given me new insecurities things i was never insecure about or knew were huge hinderances like my height being shy etc came on my radar all of a sudden after reading these types of forums as huge negatives to women and made me even worse..[btw im not saying its one sided im sure struggling women feel the same about men after reading these types of forums]
I know theyres alot of good people here who even if therye giving generic cliche advice are trying to help but to read alot of the stuff i see on here and other sites like this makes me think the majority of people are shallow vain self absorbed whackos..
So while i appreciate sites like these and some of the good advice i think it can be more harmful at times then good
You're going to have to use decent judgment when screening out the wackos.
Here's the deal. There are quite a number of good posters on here. These are people who are in stable and happy relationships. Obviously, they have made good decisions regarding their relationships, so they are wise enough to give you the benefit of their wisdom.
Then there are the posters who can't remain in a stable, mutually respectful relationship if their very lives depended on it. They make awful choices in the partners they choose, the things they say, the things they do, and the priorities they have. And yet they want to chime in one everybody else's relationships as if they have the first clue what they're talking about.
Need some really good advice? Here you go. You can take every single one of these to the bank:
1) Pay attention to who the person is, not what the person says.
2) When in doubt, be kind and thoughtful.
3) Forget really stupid theories that get applied to entire genders. Treat that other person like, well, a person with individual fears, passions, qualities, and idiosyncrasies.
4) Never spend a nanosecond with someone who doesn't make you feel good about yourself.
5) Sex is good. Sex with someone whom you really enjoy being with is much better. People who busy themselves with putting notches in their bedposts ultimately leave unfulfilling and empty lives.
6) At all times, respect yourself.
7) At all times, be discriminating in your long-term relationships. Because you might be dealing with this person for the rest of your life.
8) If you have multiple relationship problems, the common denominator in all those failures is you. Learn.
9) Before that person can get to know your amazing soul, you have to actually physically attract that person first. Pay attention to how you dress and how you look. First impressions mean a great deal in this world.
10) At the same time, boobs sag and hair falls out over the long haul. So make sure that person you're attracted to has a brain and a soul to go along with the smoking hot body and the dazzling eyes.
11) Relationships are a partnership. Listen carefully to what the other person says. If that person always has problems in life with work, money, friends, family and everything else on the planet and it's NEVER HIS/HER FAULT, then walk away as fast as you can. Because you'll just be the next enabler in his/her messed-up life.
12) Finally, a person who is nice to you but isn't nice to the waiter or the cashier at the grocery store is not a nice person.
13) In a relationship, both people participate. If you are doing everything for the other person yet he/she does nothing for you, you're not a partner. You're an employee.
There you go. Memorize these twelve rules and you won't go wrong.
yes the internet makes me even more insecure. like how men seem to always post photos of attractive white and biracial women. I feel angry, sad and depressed because I have no value to men or society in general
Don't look now, but she's BAA-AACK!
Meanwhile, while you're depressed, dark-skinned black women are enjoying life, getting flirted with almost daily, are dating and having fun. How do they do it? Well, for one thing, they're very friendly, smile, and have attractive, even bubbly, personalities. Give it a try.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
(SARCASM!)
