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Women usually get a pass for it while men who do it are more likely to be scolded for being a bully. But I agree with you that bullying is awful and some people kill themselves over it.
Women don't get "a pass" for bullying...where do you get that idea?
Well, I actually buy that he's changed. But my point earlier was, that no matter how sincere he is, she's not going to see it that way. That's the problem. All he can do is try, by approaching her on FB and apologizing and saying he was a dumb kid back then, but she's still going to interpret that through her own lens. But he can try. At this point, he's got nothing to lose, and he seems to understand that he's got flack coming to him, so he wont' be surprised if she figuratively slams the door in his face.
I agree, but I'd add that the OP didn't ask what his chances are, at least not in the thread title. He asked whether it was wrong to contact her now. I think it is. At the least, how she might feel about her past with him should be this "changed" person's first concern. Hearing from him might remind her of that pain from HS, a pain she's hopefully well past. But since she's hot now he should remind her of those experiences and what he thought of her then. Maybe she'll be all magnanimous and maybe that she'll even feel like the human condition has been redeemed by his contrition. It could happen. But maybe not. My point is the OP shouldn't flip that very likely unfair coin for her.
The thing is would you women say the same if it were the other way around? I.E a guy that was nerdy and not very athletic in HS got rejected and had mean/rude things said to him by women then years later he worked out, got fit, managed to become successful in a tech field and the same women tried to hook up with him but he wouldn't give them the time of day?
A person with a mean spirit doesn't usually grow out of it--they simply learn to hide it better--that goes for men and women.
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