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Theoretically you could be out the door as soon as a better opportunity arises. Nothing concrete.
A simple phone call and you are into another adventure.
No commitment. Really easy to drop everything and leave.
To paraphrase that movie "Heat"
Never become involved in anything you can't drop in 30seconds.
I've read that "work" in a relationship is more like driving and less like hard labor. You have be be aware, present, attentive, proactive, and reactive. The question about your ideal relationship that some people are having is mainly wondering if you can achieve real intimacy with someone while you're also keeping them at arm's length.
Oh Okay, thanks for clarifying that for me. I can see where people are coming from when looking at it from that perspective. I would like to think that it is possible, i wouldn't hide any feelings or anything from them, we would just not be living together, I would be an open book.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SelfRescuingPrincess
but why would you do those things for someone you despise? I'm confused.
You missed my point. The act of being there for someone through a hard time should be second nature for someone you care about, which is not really work for any decent person.
Even more so, I believe that a relationship is supposed to be, first and foremost, easy. "Hard work" is just Hollywood BS to get people to produce more taxpayers. (Because welfare programs and tax cuts for the rich.) If a relationship isn't smoothly coasting along on its own and its problems aren't resolving themselves, then it's not a good relationship, and should be promptly ended.
Is a friendship supposed to be "hard work"? No! Then why should a relationship be? Anyone, other than Hollywood, have an answer? Conversely, if two friends always argue, they stop being friends, plain and simple! Then why in the world are you supposed to "work through it" when there's a ye olde relationshippe [sic] going on?
I agree, I don't believe in arguing and all that BS. a relationship does not have to be hard, people are just conditioned to expect it to be.
I've read that "work" in a relationship is more like driving and less like hard labor. You have be be aware, present, attentive, proactive, and reactive. The question about your ideal relationship that some people are having is mainly wondering if you can achieve real intimacy with someone while you're also keeping them at arm's length.
thank you - you put it much better than I was able to!
how many close relationships have you had that were "easy" - no work whatsoever? I can count on one hand how many of those I've had, and they ended quickly because we were still putting on first impressions and hadn't really gotten to know who the other person really was. Friendships and relationships overall are work because not everyone is happy-go-lucky and available for you at all times. People go through their own crap.They have bad days. They have losses. Supporting them and helping them deal with that crap is work. If you aren't willing to do that work, then you aren't cut out for ANY meaningful relationship.
I don't consider any of my relationships work, I am a very positive person always smiling and brightening peoples days, people love to be around me cause I am infectious with my positive vibe. I help people get through bad times (family or friends) I can sympathize very well, but I don't consider any of this work, its just part of my personality.
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