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If she presses me for marriage, then she would NOT be a woman I want. My way is simple, you want me or do you want the ring?
Right, so it becomes an issue of does she want YOU or does she want a man who wants HER enough that he's willing to make a commitment to her in a shorter timeframe than five years.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
26,700 posts, read 41,763,058 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sweet Like Sugar
Right, so it becomes an issue of does she want YOU or does she want a man who wants HER enough that he's willing to make a commitment to her in a shorter timeframe than five years.
If I'm giving her the title of girlfriend, ain't that commitment enough?
And don't worry, I'd make it clear when it comes to kids, HELL no straight from the beginning.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
26,700 posts, read 41,763,058 times
Reputation: 41381
Quote:
Originally Posted by Liberty2011
Exactly. The vetting goes both ways.
I ain't holding them in the county jail. If they want to leave because I don't feel comfortable with marriage, no skin off my nose, the door is free for their use.
If I'm giving her the title of girlfriend, ain't that commitment enough?
And don't worry, I'd make it clear when it comes to kids, HELL no straight from the beginning.
No, it won't be enough for some. I'm not saying that you shouldn't do what you want if you really INSIST on waiting 5 years before you would consider marriage. I just personally wouldn't want to miss out on someone who I really cared about over some arbitrary rule like that when you know there's no guarantee that you'll ever find that same connection with anyone else again.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
26,700 posts, read 41,763,058 times
Reputation: 41381
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sweet Like Sugar
No, it won't be enough for some. I'm not saying that you shouldn't do what you want if you really INSIST on waiting 5 years before you would consider marriage. I just personally wouldn't want to miss out on someone who I really cared about over some arbitrary rule like that when you know there's no guarantee that you'll ever find that same connection with anyone else again.
That's a chance I'm willing to take, losing a girlfriend is no big deal, going through a divorce is hell and my 5 year rule gives me a better chance of avoiding that IMO.
Not everyone has the luxury of time to wait for that 5-10 years. On top of that, how many 5-10 years do we really have? Sometime in life you have to take a leap at faith.
That's a chance I'm willing to take, losing a girlfriend is no big deal, going through a divorce is hell and my 5 year rule gives me a better chance of avoiding that IMO.
I don't think anyone on this forum would disagree with you. Marrying someone you have only known for a month is extremely foolish, because you can't know them in that time.
But that's a completely different story from taking 5 years to make a decision.
5 years I agree is too long which is why I'd give it 2 to 3 at max.
Status:
"I don't understand. But I don't care, so it works out."
(set 11 days ago)
35,637 posts, read 17,994,810 times
Reputation: 50679
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Dissenter
That's a chance I'm willing to take, losing a girlfriend is no big deal, going through a divorce is hell and my 5 year rule gives me a better chance of avoiding that IMO.
So your goal is different. It sounds like you'd be ok never marrying. So in that case, waiting 20 years to decide is still fine, since marrying isn't your priority.
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