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I never considered 11 years a big gap. However, my FWB was 8 years older than me, and after that ended I went out on a date with a guy who was 1 year older than him. He looked older in his photos online, but when I met him, I got to see just how old he really looked. Dude had a lotta hard miles on him. He asked me if I was really ok dating guys who were "much" older than me. I was going to say "9 years isn't that much older" but I stopped. He was in a much older place than my FWB, who had 6-pack abs and was all kinds of sexy, even though chronologically they were only a year apart.
I absolutely don't need another guy with a 6-pack, but if you're viewing me (at 42) as some young thing from another generation when we're less than 10 years apart in age, that's going to tell me you're too old for me. I don't mind older at all. They can even look their age. But if they're acting like they're looking at me from across a chasm of time, that's a turnoff.
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