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Old Today, 05:51 AM
 
Location: San Antonio/Houston/Tricity
38,081 posts, read 55,850,828 times
Reputation: 89918

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Quote:
Originally Posted by kitty99 View Post
You are old enough to be his mom. It's going to be a tough road to take this on. People will judge you. To each their own but I would not want to deal with someone at that age. Is he still living at home???? Personally I think he is just experimenting, and enjoys attention from others so he's not committed to you.

Of course, they will judge you - openly or behind your back.
He IS a kid. He IS definitely a kid to a person of your age. I don't see a (big) problem when someone is 60 dating 43. But the age and maturity difference between a 39 y.o woman and 22 y.o. boy is huge.

He lives at home. He isn't mature enough to move out and provide/care for himself.
What are you to him? A sex experiment? Mother figure? Sugar mommy?
He isn't obviously proud of this "relationship", otherwise he would be showing you around, bragging about his love, posting on social media. But he is keeping you in secret. Why? You should know why. You ARE old enough...

What is he to you? Longing for youth? Feeling attractive and desirable because you have a young BF?
Did you ever got married? Had kids? Feeling lonely? Missing opportunities? Is he a substitute?

What you WANT us to say? You don't want to be judged, so you want approval. Sorry, most of us don't feel that way.
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Last edited by elnina; Today at 06:02 AM..

 
Old Today, 05:59 AM
 
Location: Coastal New Jersey
56,186 posts, read 54,646,759 times
Reputation: 66671
One year my now-exh was in four weddings. One of the marriages was between one of his friends, who was 27, to a woman who was 40.

Ten years or so later, they were the only couple of those marriages who was still together. I have no idea if they still are, but just putting that out there. It has happened. I do have to note that the man's mother had died when he was very young, the woman already had two grown children, 18 and 20, and he did not want children of their own, so the framework of their relationship seemed beneficial to both.

About three years ago, I met a couple in which the woman was, I believe, 20 years older than her husband. They had been married for 25 years.

So, it's rarer than May-December marriages wherein the man is the older of the couple, but it does happen.
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Old Today, 06:09 AM
 
Location: San Antonio/Houston/Tricity
38,081 posts, read 55,850,828 times
Reputation: 89918
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mightyqueen801 View Post
One year my now-exh was in four weddings. One of the marriages was between one of his friends, who was 27, to a woman who was 40.

Ten years or so later, they were the only couple of those marriages who was still together. I have no idea if they still are, but just putting that out there. It has happened. I do have to note that the man's mother had died when he was very young, the woman already had two grown children, 18 and 20, and he did not want children of their own, so the framework of their relationship seemed beneficial to both.

About three years ago, I met a couple in which the woman was, I believe, 20 years older than her husband. They had been married for 25 years.

So, it's rarer than May-December marriages wherein the man is the older of the couple, but it does happen.
Yes, it happens. BUT in OP case her "BF" is keeping their "relationship" secret. So, obviously, HE thinks that there IS something inappropriate or even shameful about it, or he isn't in love, or he isn't serious, or ALL of the above.
OP, in contrary, is enamored and infatuated with his youth, good sex and a boy who probably is easy to manipulate.
THIS is completely different from the scenarios you described.
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Old Today, 06:14 AM
 
Location: a primitive state
9,887 posts, read 20,178,658 times
Reputation: 12443
The reason you are a secret is because people judge. It’s convenient for him because he is free to flirt with other people while getting free sex training from you on the side. Sure he loves you, just like he loves pizza.

What’s going to happen if he breaks up with you? You work together. How will you feel when he starts openly dating someone else?

It was a bad decision from the beginning.
 
Old Today, 06:29 AM
 
29 posts, read 200 times
Reputation: 10
His rule was not to date anyone at work.But he is dating me...Yes,i knew he had female friends.And he works two jobs.His previous girlfriends left him because didnt give thrm any attention.He helps me with money and i help hin as well at times.We visited California.Hawaii.Florida and we ll go to Italy this year.Yes,around my friends he is my boyfriend.We got finances together.Plans together ...plans to move out the city and start a new life.He was gone 5 months,went to concerts with other girls...when he got back first night to town where did he go ? To my place...yes.And no,im not a bad looking woman either.Why would he openly date at work when he dont believe in dating at work ?
 
Old Today, 06:34 AM
 
29 posts, read 200 times
Reputation: 10
Why would he break up with me ? Because he sees someone better looking or younger ? Is that ??
 
Old Today, 06:41 AM
 
Location: San Antonio/Houston/Tricity
38,081 posts, read 55,850,828 times
Reputation: 89918
Quote:
Originally Posted by Blondie19 View Post
Why would he break up with me ? Because he sees someone better looking or younger ? Is that ??
Yup!! Remember that in 10 years you will be almost 50 while he would be only 32 and girls who would want to date him will be in mid 20's. (That's half of your age!) He will be ready to marry a young woman and start family, have kids.
BTW: If he likes attention, he would want them, not you.
Does it answer your question??
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Old Today, 06:44 AM
 
5,197 posts, read 2,775,126 times
Reputation: 9528
are you his boss? define hanging out.
 
Old Today, 06:46 AM
 
29 posts, read 200 times
Reputation: 10
Quote:
Originally Posted by elnina View Post
Yup!! Remember that in 10 years you will be almost 50 while he would be only 32 and girls who would want to date him will be in mid 20's. That's half of your age.
If he likes attention, he would want them, not you.
Does it answer your question??
We did not know our age until we booked plane tickets.It was 3 months after we started dating
 
Old Today, 06:49 AM
 
29 posts, read 200 times
Reputation: 10
Quote:
Originally Posted by SWFL_Native View Post
are you his boss? define hanging out.
Nope.I am not his boss...he quit the job for few months while out in south America.He is a professional musician.He akways had female friends...at breaks at work.They play basketball or tenniss.My best friend is his boss and she encouraged me to date him .I gnored him in the beginning
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