How about this "Minnesota Ice" vs. "Minnesota Nice" stuff?? (Minneapolis: renters, movers)

[green_mariner]

Originally Posted by sonoronos

You just have to learn how to call people out on things to get the "desired" response

The way I called her out was "What did you just say?"

[Finger Laker]

you have to come more aggressive than that

something like - "i love the fresh prince, did you see the episode where carlton banks lodged his boot in some mouthy chicks colon?! - i could re-enact it if you'd like"

[moving123456]

Originally Posted by Finger Laker

you have to come more aggressive than that

something like - "i love the fresh prince, did you see the episode where carlton banks lodged his boot in some mouthy chicks colon?! - i could re-enact it if you'd like"

.....then later whine on here that no MN natives want to be friends with you.

[MrMinneapolis]

Originally Posted by pirate_lafitte

The way I called her out was "What did you just say?"

Shoulda just been like "**** DUMB B WORD"

Sometimes its the only way to get your point across to some people.

[green_mariner]

Originally Posted by MrMinneapolis

Shoulda just been like "**** DUMB B WORD"

Sometimes its the only way to get your point across to some people.

I have done that many times. I also got into some trouble for it too. Perhaps it is the only thing some people understand. With that said, some people are even more passive-agressive enough to do stupid things later on.

[Finger Laker]

Originally Posted by moving123456

.....then later whine on here that no MN natives want to be friends with you.

what, no sense of humor now that summer is almost over?!

or are you one of those people who think it's cool to talk crap about people, mock them, be rude and generally act like a jerk as long as you can safely do it in your bubble and no one has the gall to approach you on it and make you uncomfortable for your unsavory behavior

i also wasn't whining about anything on here - let alone making friends, which I was able to do pretty easily and still maintain them to this day

you are correct though - i have no interest in being friends with the passive aggressive losers who only have the courage to speak their mind in a hushed whisper in a comfortable crowd of friends as they try to pump themselves up by running down a stranger or someone else who they don't really know

[babrent]

You know your a Minnesotant: when you've been with your mate for 30 years and almost told them you love them.. lol

I can say from experience from living all over Minnesota: in the northern part of the state, Duluth (small city), Brainerd (small town), can have some different people and expectations. Duluth was the ICEest place I ever lived for under a year. I did not make one single friend. People in the skyways or city streets really did not smile, but they were very helpful in stores and so forth but being a smaller town I'm guessing that people know each other or know that words travel from one end to other relatively fast, like lets say you had an affair or something. So I think people are more careful about what they say. I lived in the metro for years now (never leaving again lol) and here you'll probably never run in to the same person twice unless you go to the same places. It's younger too. So all in all what I'm trying to get at is that yes people are people but it's how these groups work together that makes the Nice or Ice. Go to a big event Nice! Get on the freeway ICE! Go to a small bar in north mn use their bathroom and don't get a beer and expect to get some mean uncalled for harassment from the small town people. Go to a small bar anywhere in the metro and no one will even know you were there. I think people in bigger places are more open to new people and welcome them because.. hey.. what choice do they have, it's big, with a lot of people. In small places people (sorry to put everyone in a box I mean no harm I just can not explain better) for many different social reasons tend to be afraid of outsiders. They are so afraid that yes they will tell everyone that they have a problem with you except -you-, childish I know, as it's a small town and they don't want you to be mad at them for telling everyone they are not nice etc. Small groups of people or smaller towns have there own marching pattern (that makes the voices in my head scream at each other) and in bigger place you get to meet new people all the time. All I can say is the metro it is a wonderful place to meet people. It just finding the right groups of open minded, accepting, nice people. Sure everyone is busy on the face of the earth lol but some people are at least kind and some are not. So my over all point is where are they from and how did they get to where you are? That might make up the open minded "hello may I help you's" vs 'oh god don't talk to me'. Not saying that is small town but some people are just afraid of people. Just look at voting season.. you have people that truly want to help and get things done and you have a group of people that wants to just be boat anchors.. it's hard yes. But I think the bigger you go the better your chances of meeting nice people. Not that you can't meet nice people in smaller place in MN but they will not take kindly to you until at least a background check and that you know someone in their family lol

There is somewhat of a big disconnect lol. Cold people suck the life out of me.

[sonoronos]

Originally Posted by babrent

You know your a Minnesotant: when you've been with your mate for 30 years and almost told them you love them.. lol

Hey...isn't that a "Bro Minnesota"? (sorry, shameless "I Love You, Man" reference

[sparksals]

Originally Posted by knke0204

Moving to a new city regardless of distance is a life experience, yes. How could you disagree? Honestly. Explain. What's the difference? You could be in New Jersey and move three hours and be in Pennsylvania, Delaware, New York, Maryland, DC, Connecticut, or Virgina.

"see thats the problem with most people that is only apparent to outsiders" What? Sorry, I don't understand your broken sentence. But, yes, when you move to a city where you don't know anybody and there are significant regional and cultural differences, I would say yes, it is worthy of a life experience.

The topic of conversation is Ice Vs Nice. I am sick and tired of people acting like they move to Minnesota and they expect everyone in the world to take them in and be great friends...But most of these people will do nothing to try and make friends, especially in Minnesota where people value family and friendship and are often times very content with their social standing, where making an effort to take in transplants isn't a priority.

This is the whole premise of nice vs. ice. Minnesotans are nice, but don't you dare infiltrate their deeply rooted social circle - for the reasons you cited. This is why it's so hard to move here.

You said yourself that it's not a priority to make new friends and then you also suggest that we do nothing to try to make new friends. In my case, that couldn't be further from the truth. We HAVE tried. We have joined meetups, social clubs etc., yet the people from here gravitate to those from here.

I have to say all our friends are people who aren't from here. It does burn me up a bit when people imply we expect others to drop everything to be our friend. THat just isn't the case at all. The problem is we honestly TRY to meet new people, make new friends, but the established circles are locked like Ft. Knox.

[sparksals]

Originally Posted by Camden Northsider

I don't get it- I'd like to know where everyone is living and/or working (or spending their free time) that is having this issue- when we moved to our current neighborhood, we quickly became friends with several of our neighbors- and yes, we are "real" friends that hang out with each other on a regular basis, dogsit and share house-keys with eachother, etc. I've become "real" friends with people represented in the groups I've talked about in my above post since coming here through work activities, and my native-born/raised MNan coworkers have not only also befriended me and now my wife, but introduced us to people (that we have also become friends with) in their long-time social circles as well (and we have done the same). This doesn't even mention the relationships we've developed with people involved with our neighborhood association, other committees/ volunteer activities we're a part of, etc.- and we still maintain our college friendships (and a couple of high school as well) with people that live in the cities. However, I would never have expected anyone to go out of their way to sympathy-befriend me because I wasn't from here - that would seem really artificial and strained, although we ourselves may be guilty of having done this on occassion...I think people just need to be active, quit feeling sorry for themselves, and just put themselves out there you know?

I think you lucked out, Camden. We ARE active. We try to meet people, get to know our neighbours and still experience the ice. Sure, they talk to us, but never have they invited us over.

Here's an example. The girls next door are heavily involved in sports. We sponsor their team, buy their magazines or gift cards or whatever they are selling. When they come to the door, I ask them in, chat with them. Even gave their mom a tour after we moved in b/c we painted the entire house and put in new carpet and light fixtures. They have been inside our house about 10 times since we moved in 1.5 years ago. They also come to our back yard, plunk themselves down and chat for a bit. I wouldn't dream of coming to their yard and plunk myself down b/c it would then look like I'm trying to get an invite to their swimming pool. So, it seems to be a pretty uneven level of neighbourliness.

BUT we have NEVER been invited to their house. She keeps saying 'we must get together', but it never materializes. I got a piece of their mail by accident, I went over, rang the doorbell and she literally held the door behind her and never invited me in.

A friend of mine (who is also not from here) has a friend who is from here who she gets together with occasionally and has known for 8 years. This friend of hers has been to her house numerous times. Yet, in the 8 years they have known each other, not once has my friend been invited to her friend's house. Not once.

Just as Minnesotans are tired of hearing us 'whine' or 'complain' and imply we do nothing to make friends, we are tired of hearing that argument b/c we DO try.

Honestly, Camden... you lucked out.