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I would have walked away from subway right away without giving him any more time to speak, ride the bus and instead invite my parents to a restaurant (once in a while, I will spend my spare time with my parents and family... now that's more fun than wasting further time on a jerk) or take my kid brother to the movies.
I was in shock, so i took the subway and went back home in the metro. Lol
I dated a man once that took me to Subway. And bought me a 5 dollars sub. I got all dressed up and he took me to Subway.
He told me I thought you were prettier (i meet him thru online dating) and you only deserve a 5 dollar meal. Then he went home and wrote a long diatribe on Facebook about how he spend all his money on the date with me blah blah blah..... Obvi. I nver saw him again.
I could have been in bed cuddling with my cats watching Netflix and having a better time ( he did not a coupon though)
What a douche!!! Good riddance.
Some men need home training.
Which I said, because I knew no one could give me a legit answer.
S'all good, back to the Texans.
Here's a newsflash: you're never going to get a 'legit' answer you said yourself you don't find it tacky, so it's a waste of time looking for answers. You already have your opinion on the matter, as do I. As usual with men -- what you really have a problem with is that others don't share your opinion on it. Luckily, that's not anyone else's problem. Yes back to whatever....
I said on a first date. I didn't say someone you're dating or in a relationship with or married to. If you feel it's not tacky on the first date, so be it. Beauty of opinion.
Well, I'd never do it on a first date. I think that's tacky, but if you've been dating someone for a while or in a relationship, I see no problem with it. I've had girls do it all the time out of their own volition (but only after we've been dating a while) And honestly, if I'm paying, I have the right to save a few bucks, no?
Well, I'd never do it on a first date. I think that's tacky, but if you've been dating someone for a while or in a relationship, I see no problem with it. I've had girls do it all the time out of their own volition (but only after we've been dating a while) And honestly, if I'm paying, I have the right to save a few bucks, no?
I have never had a man get hostile because he paid for a date. IMHO, if I initiated the date, I pay, if he initiated the date, he pays. But a lot of the men I've dated won't EVER hear of me helping with the tab. They actually are insulted if I offer. And I certainly would not make a big deal in front of others if I were picking up the tab. Then again, I'm dating men over 50, and that's a generational thing.
If we have gone out for awhile, I will quietly say something on the way into the restaurant or venue that "I think it's about my turn to chip in here." Then I let him make the decision. I asked one man, "When is it my turn to pay? You've been so generous." His response? "Never."
That being said, I always am careful to not choose the most expensive thing on the menu. Now that I'm dating someone regularly, I often offer to treat him to dessert at our favorite ice cream place afterwards. Or I will invite him to the house for dinner and if he asks, tell him all he has to bring is "a big appetite and a bottle of wine." That evens it out. If the date is a weekend camping trip, we both bring the food and drinks.
This IS the "Relationship Forum..." So we are talking about what it takes to find and grow a good relationship. Every one of us is unique in the ways we've been raised, our financial abilities, and our attitudes about the whole dating process. Different parts of the country will also have varying degrees of chivalry still alive.
Women who really care about the man they are dating will pay attention if he's struggling (and who isn't these days?) There are many alternatives to going to the most expensive restaurant in town. The first date I had with one guy in college was to the laundromat!! We both had heavy schedules and decided we could kill two birds with one stone. There was a pizza place next door, so we split a pizza while doing laundry. It truly is one of the most memorable dates I've ever had. Sweet, uncomplicated, made an onerous chore fun, and we ended up with a very long term relationship that I still cherish to this day.
I think women need to be willing to give a little. And I always counseled my brothers to be careful if she was too expensive in the first few months of courtship. Not all women are princesses, but if you are drawn to that type, well, you get what you deserve. They tend to cost a lot - when you are dating them, when you marry them, and when you divorce them.
One of my brothers used to grumble about his girlfriend being a princess. I told him -- there's a really fun little hot dog stand down by the park. Since you've been dating for several months, take her to the park to walk around and people watch, then take her to the hot dog stand for lunch. If she rakes you over the coals for it, consider that a gift and run for the hills!!
I'm not being disloyal to my gender, but I DO think women who think a man is a meal ticket are setting up both themselves and the guys they date for huge failures. Relationships only work if there is give and take.
All that being said, if a man is "hostile" about anything that occurred on a date he set up with me, I'd be excusing myself halfway through the date and catching a cab home. Hostility is a red flag no matter what the conditions are.
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