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Old 09-02-2013, 03:08 PM
 
Location: Katonah, NY
21,192 posts, read 25,202,920 times
Reputation: 22276

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Elained10 View Post
Being ready for kids does. I've always been more mature so having my son at 23 was no problem for me.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Elained10 View Post
You're wrong. Having my child made me grow up more because I had a responsibility. I had this little baby who depended on me for everything, I had to be the best parent I could be so yes I think having a baby forces you to grow up. I do believe I'm mature beyond my years.
I agree with your second post - but not your first. You didn't say that having a child accidentally made you grow up - you said you had always been more mature. There's a big difference. And your posts to me are still not really convincing me that you are mature beyond your years.

I'm not arguing whether or not having a baby forces you to grow up - I'm arguing that just because you have a baby young or feel like you are ready to have a baby young does not mean that you are more mature than others your age. As I'm sure you realize now - having a baby is a huge responsibility that is quite impossible to imagine in full scope before you actually have a baby. Like I said, there are lots of teenagers that glamorize having children and think they are ready at a very young age. That has nothing to do with maturity and more to do with ignorance.
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Old 09-02-2013, 03:09 PM
 
10,029 posts, read 10,906,933 times
Reputation: 5946
Quote:
Originally Posted by Elained10 View Post
Thank you love!


Our system over here is very different.
Well in the USA we have a serious welfare problem where women have babies they can't afford while tax payers pay more in taxes. These women are not qualified to be mothers, they were too immature if they couldn't afford it.
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Old 09-02-2013, 03:11 PM
 
10,029 posts, read 10,906,933 times
Reputation: 5946
Quote:
Originally Posted by jma501 View Post
I feel the same way about having a big family. If my early 50 something uncle can have a relationship with a very early thirty something woman with luck so can I.
Yeah sure and since my one uncle is rich I too can be rich as well. Either your uncle is handsome, wealthy, she has daddy issues, very lucky or the woman is using him for his money. Most 30 something women don't find 50 year old men attractive.
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Old 09-02-2013, 03:13 PM
 
Location: Glasgow, uk
2,386 posts, read 3,273,025 times
Reputation: 1593
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dewdrop93 View Post
I agree with your second post - but not your first. You didn't say that having a child accidentally made you grow up - you said you had always been more mature. There's a big difference. And your posts to me are still not really convincing me that you are mature beyond your years.

I'm not arguing whether or not having a baby forces you to grow up - I'm arguing that just because you have a baby young or feel like you are ready to have a baby young does not mean that you are more mature than others your age. As I'm sure you realize now - having a baby is a huge responsibility that is quite impossible to imagine in full scope before you actually have a baby. Like I said, there are lots of teenagers that glamorize having children and think they are ready at a very young age. That has nothing to do with maturity and more to do with ignorance.
I have always been more mature. I think because everyone in my family are alot older I grew up around adults. I grew up more having my son yes but I was always more mature than others my own age..........I don't think having a child as a young teen is wise because they have still to grow up and go to school etc but if they have kids and are good parents then they should not be judged in my opinion.


I know older mums 30+ who struggle and aren't very good parents and I know younger parents 20ish who are great parents. I think it depends on the person not the age.


Also circumstances/ life experience changes a person and their maturity levels.
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Old 09-02-2013, 03:19 PM
 
Location: Katonah, NY
21,192 posts, read 25,202,920 times
Reputation: 22276
Quote:
Originally Posted by Elained10 View Post
I have always been more mature. I think because everyone in my family are alot older I grew up around adults. I grew up more having my son yes but I was always more mature than others my own age..........I don't think having a child as a young teen is wise because they have still to grow up and go to school etc but if they have kids and are good parents then they should not be judged in my opinion.


I know older mums 30+ who struggle and aren't very good parents and I know younger parents 20ish who are great parents. I think it depends on the person not the age.


Also circumstances/ life experience changes a person and their maturity levels.
I'm not judging whether or not you are a good parent. I'm also not debating whether or not older parents are better than younger parents. I was questioning your self assessment about your maturity level. But calling me stupid and going off on me isn't really going far in proving your maturity level.

The fact of the matter is - you are as single mother at 25. It would make sense to date older men since most men your own age are probably not looking to settle down into a ready made family.
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Old 09-02-2013, 03:20 PM
 
2,183 posts, read 2,205,875 times
Reputation: 1852
Quote:
Originally Posted by Idon'tdateyou View Post
Actually it is my business if welfare was paying for him. Studies have proven that many babies born to unwed mothers were on welfare and that isn't responsible behavior.
As a low income housing property manager for 16 years I refute this claim. I only had a small percentage that were on welfare. Most were working their butts off to support their kids on a minimum wage salary. I had and still have respect for these struggling moms.
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Old 09-02-2013, 03:22 PM
 
Location: Glasgow, uk
2,386 posts, read 3,273,025 times
Reputation: 1593
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dewdrop93 View Post
I'm not judging whether or not you are a good parent. I'm also not debating whether or not older parents are better than younger parents. I was questioning your self assessment about your maturity level. But calling me stupid and going off on me isn't really going far in proving your maturity level.

The fact of the matter is - you are as single mother at 25. It would make sense to date older men since most men your own age are probably not looking to settle down into a ready made family.
I could not disagree with you more. I live in Scotland you have no idea what the guys are like here. I did not go off on you at all, I told you I was not arguing about my personal choices. It's not just a self assessment, I have had many people in my life tell me.
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Old 09-02-2013, 03:22 PM
 
2,183 posts, read 2,205,875 times
Reputation: 1852
Quote:
Originally Posted by Idon'tdateyou View Post
Yeah sure and since my one uncle is rich I too can be rich as well. Either your uncle is handsome, wealthy, she has daddy issues, very lucky or the woman is using him for his money. Most 30 something women don't find 50 year old men attractive.
Wrong. He is middle class, portly and is very often seriously Ill with crohn's.
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Old 09-02-2013, 03:23 PM
 
10,029 posts, read 10,906,933 times
Reputation: 5946
Quote:
Originally Posted by jma501 View Post
As a low income housing property manager for 16 years I refute this claim. I only had a small percentage that were on welfare. Most were working their butts off to support their kids on a minimum wage salary. I had and still have respect for these struggling moms.
Studies don't prove this. According to the latest stats, 54% of births in Illinois were on welfare. I don't know about other stats but in Illinois we have a generous welfare system and most illegitimate births were on welfare.
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Old 09-02-2013, 03:24 PM
 
Location: Glasgow, uk
2,386 posts, read 3,273,025 times
Reputation: 1593
Quote:
Originally Posted by jma501 View Post
As a low income housing property manager for 16 years I refute this claim. I only had a small percentage that were on welfare. Most were working their butts off to support their kids on a minimum wage salary. I had and still have respect for these struggling moms.
That's because you are a very nice and non judgemental individual. If people were more like you the world would be a better place
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