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It's got to be MUTUAL. I don't mind taking some initiative but I'm not going to be doing all or even the majority of the calling, suggesting, initiating. That gets really tiresome and I would lose interest because it would seem that the man isn't all that interested in me!
When you call someone, it shows you've been thinking about them. When you invite someone somewhere, it shows you want to spend time with them. Think about the reverse -- if you're not calling, then she thinks that she's not on your mind; if you don't ask her out, then she thinks you're not that keen to spend time with her. Most people want to be wanted and won't push the issue if they don't think they are.
I meant it as a response to "I LOVE PA", if her daughter thinks she never have to show any intrest or take any initiatives then why would any guy want to date her? Why would any guy want to date a woman who thinks she is god's gift to men? as "Chorizo" said thats just not attractive at all.
I'm not so certain that the comment made by PA's daughter conveys the 'God's Gift' mentality. There are men who prefer to initiate and there are women who accept this.
It seems that women can sometimes 'smother' men and be guilty of being too pushy.
It has been several months since I saw the 'Should I Give Him a Cupcake' thread but I will never forget that. I was a bit scornful until I recently took a similar risk and now must wonder if I was too overbearing or violated boundaries.
Why it must be so complicated I cannot say. If a miracle occurs and you like a person and the person likes you back then be thankful. $.02
^^ That's your job, not ours. If you view your self as handicapped in the dating world before you even start then just stay put. You will never attract anyone feeling sorry for yourself or harping on your weaknesses...quiet, short, shy....it's not cute, sexy or attractive.
Every pot has it's lid....even shortstacks
Seeniorita, liked your post! You tell it like it is.
I'm not so certain that the comment made by PA's daughter conveys the 'God's Gift' mentality. There are men who prefer to initiate and there are women who accept this.
It seems that women can sometimes 'smother' men and be guilty of being too pushy.
It has been several months since I saw the 'Should I Give Him a Cupcake' thread but I will never forget that. I was a bit scornful until I recently took a similar risk and now must wonder if I was too overbearing or violated boundaries.
Why it must be so complicated I cannot say. If a miracle occurs and you like a person and the person likes you back then be thankful. $.02
Why is it always the man who has to take the initiative? The man is usually the one who has to ask the girl out and initiate every contact when dating. Why don't girls ever ask guy's out? Why don't girls ever initiate contact?
It's not an always thing, but most men are the ones who have to do the pursuing. It's been like that from the beginning of our species. Many animals are the same way: males try to outdo each other and females select the male they want.
For those dogging him for his use of absolutes, stop it. The few women who do pursue man merely are exceptions that prove the rule.
Excuses? Excuses for what? I was just describing myself... And you go ahead and find a girl who likes shy quiet and short guys.
I happen to like shy and quiet guys - and I don't care if they are short or chubby or whatever. What I DO care about is if they have a nice personality, can make me laugh, enjoy similar tastes in music and are willing to take me waterskiing. What I REALLY REALLY dislike are guys who have so much self-pity, they are drowning in it. They give off an odor that I can smell miles away.
Sorry, but some men can't get a date NOT because they are shy or quiet or short, but because they are simpering, whiney, annoying, woe is me, lost his personality milksops who want to blame women for all their problems.
Why is it always the man who has to take the initiative? The man is usually the one who has to ask the girl out and initiate every contact when dating. Why don't girls ever ask guy's out? Why don't girls ever initiate contact?
The man is the hunter, but a lot of women are asking out....it's just that, they're not asking you out though.
No work and a lousy attitude won't get you anyone.
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Why is it always the man...
If you view your self as handicapped in the dating world before you even start then just stay put. You will never attract anyone feeling sorry for yourself or harping on your weaknesses...quiet, short, shy....it's not cute, sexy or attractive.
