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It seems like it would be cheaper for your son to pay for all or part of your trip, than to take the whole fam to you. I'm surprised that option didn't come up.
And with the attitude I see on most parents, including yours, I can see why she'd rather stay home.
Oh, raising kids...it's so haaaaard. Well, ya did it to yourself. Stop whinging about "saving for college" and "can barely afford to save for retirement"
Yeah, I don't need to get a clue. I have a life. Dayum. Financially irresponsible people are gonna be the death of the US. oh wait, it already is.
Nothing she said indicates she can't afford her kids.v
wow you trust people a lot don't you ? i would not be comfortable trusting a complete stranger access to my home. i just don't trust people with my dogs or any of my belongings . My dogs are also 12 and 14 yrs old so it wont be long before they are gone and then i can make the trip easier because i would be financially able then .
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Assuming you outlive your dogs, by then the grandkids won't even care if you show up or not; they have no connection with you.
Perhaps, if you suggested to your son that you would make the trip if you had some financial help boarding the dogs, he would help you. But since you're rejecting suggestions here, maybe you really don't want to go.
I can see your son's point. I think it is probably a bigger hardship for them to visit you than you visit them. It costs a lot less to board a couple dogs than it does to fly an entire family somewhere. I have a large dog. We board her sometimes, it's not THAT expensive. We've also had a neighbor watch our dog, and that costs even less. Even if they are not on a fixed income, I am guessing they are not rolling in cash either, but you are expecting them to pay 10 times the cost of boarding a couple of dogs to some see you. My family lives across the country. When we go to visit (me, DH, and 2 kids), it's costs us thousands of dollars.
That said, if they have the means, it'd be nice of them to offer to help pay at least part of the boarding cost. That would save them a lot of money compared to travelling with the whole family to see you. Why is that out of the question? If it is, then it does seem very passive-aggressive. They should be able to help come up with a reasonable compromise if they really want to see you.
wow you trust people a lot don't you ? i would not be comfortable trusting a complete stranger access to my home. i just don't trust people with my dogs or any of my belongings . My dogs are also 12 and 14 yrs old so it wont be long before they are gone and then i can make the trip easier because i would be financially able then .
Can you take the dogs? We live a 20-hour drive away from the grand parents, and we take turns visiting, both flying and driving. I'm only on page 1, but it seems like both of you could make more of an effort if you really wanted to. 6 hours isn't that far.
We found a vet tech in our vets' office that pet sits on the side. It was something like $15-$20/day for a couple cats.
I don't understand? Would you be the only one visiting or your husband as well? Your husband works but you are on a fixed income? Most hotels usually don't charge extra for up to 2 pets. And most motels usually charge like $10-$15 per pet. So what's the problem? Tell them your financial limitations and ask them if they are willing to pay the $20-30 per night fee.
My question as well. To me, a fixed income means you're on social security, or some other low income retirement.
I could be wrong -- it's been known to happen -- but I think she's using the dogs as an excuse not to go. Someone with a legitimate desire to see her grandchildren would not be on-line complaining about guilt trips. She would be figuring out how to get there despite the financial challenges.
I agree. I think there is more going on here than this one trip.
This thread makes me extremely thankful that both sets of grand parents are willing to, and financially and physically able to make the trip to visit us (a 2-day drive, or a plane ride). We also visit them, and have met them in the middle to vacation together, too. We all make the effort.
I don't recall reading if the son and grand kids visit or not, or when the last time they did make the trip was.
For a working couple with kids, July is too late to be trying to make plans for a visit. Our summers are pretty much planned by March. We have a limited amount of vacation time, and time between sports camps, etc. My in-laws used to make the mistake of asking us around May if we could visit in the summer. At that point, no way. They have learned, and now both sets of grand parents start planning far ahead of time. We planned next Christmas a full year ahead of time!
okay well maybe fixed income Is not the correct wording . I am no longer able to work due to a related injury(long story) Yes my husband would be going also .No my son is not financially able to pay even half the boarding fees or any of the trip expenses . I have been sitting down trying like the devil to figure out money , something, anything and there is nothing I can do . I have gone over it and over it on paper and there is just not any way I can do this .
I came here for advice and I'm getting judged by people who don't even know me . great thanks folks .
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