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really bc i know plenty of unemployed men with girlfriends
So you think that most women will go out with an unemployed man then, right? I would dare say you're in the minority then. (BTW, we're not talking about "he's unemployed but he's 19 and in college" because that's how most people are at that age. We're talking "he's unemployed and he's 26 and I went out with him when he was unemployed.")
I would agree that most women are not going to get with a guy who they hate just for the money. That's not what I'm saying. I'm saying that women DO take money into account when looking at a man, and not in a small way. Men don't look at women that way. They don't go "hm, could she support me? OK, then I'll go out with her." Trust me on that.
you seem to want to change the definition of gold diggers - then do you think that the majority of women are only aiming for men because of their money?
See, again you're just trying to say "a gold-digger is someone who ONLY wants money." Before, you said a gold-digger wants money ALONE. You're just repeating yourself. If you want to define "gold-digging" as "a woman detests a man but he's rich so she goes with him and that's the only way it's gold-digging," then sure most women aren't gold-diggers by your definition, which is totally irrelevant. See, it's just women trying to excuse their behavior.
You can say that all you want, but it doesn't make it so. In talking to you women, it's quite apparent that you feel entitled to a guy "providing me with a lifestyle I expect." Well, that's the same as if I married a woman, then dumped her as soon as she got old or fat and said "she stopped meeting my expectations."
I don't find it funny and it isn't "basically the same" at all. There are people who are not generous, who do not know the meaning of giving without expecting something in return, who keep score and feel that spending on another entitles them to something.
It is my impression that these are the types who cry gold digger at the drop of a hat, not because the woman is a gold digger but that they are simply too cheap and selfish with their own money.
So when you go into a relationship, I presume that you DO know the "meaning of giving without expecting something in return" and you give to the guy without expecting anything in return, right? LOL.
I would agree that most women are not going to get with a guy who they hate just for the money. That's not what I'm saying. I'm saying that women DO take money into account when looking at a man, and not in a small way. Men don't look at women that way. They don't go "hm, could she support me? OK, then I'll go out with her." Trust me on that.
Well, I agree women take money into account. I do. But I think men take money into account too. In this thread alone you have men talking about how they aren't going to support a woman or let some woman use them for money. And women do the same--they aren't going to date someone who is purposefully dead weight. So why is it okay for men to do that, but not women?
I was married to someone who made less than me and had poor credit habits. I was surprised to find out about all his secret credit cards when he asked for the divorce--he charged up $60k in debt on those secret cards. When the divorce settled, I got to take on half of that. But he was always a spendthrift and a fool with money. I will never date a man like that again.
I don't need a rich man... and I really don't care how much money a man has or doesn't. What I really care about is what does he do with what he has? If a man makes $200k a year and spends $201k a year--sorry, he's not desirable, he's foolish. But a man who makes $45k a year and spends $40k a year (or better yet only spends $38k--which means he's saving 15% like me)--he's the kind of man I am interested in. He thinks similar to me when it comes to finances and we would get along. It's not the raw numbers that matter, it's the financial wisdom.
I think most women *are* this way... this is how they consider money. And I would think (and hope) most men are this way too when they consider women.
Well, I agree women take money into account. I do. But I think men take money into account too. In this thread alone you have men talking about how they aren't going to support a woman or let some woman use them for money. And women do the same--they aren't going to date someone who is purposefully dead weight. So why is it okay for men to do that, but not women?
But it's not "okay." Look at how the women respond. It's with outrage, like "oh, you refuse to provide for me? Then you suck! Go die! You're just bitter and your genitals are probably small! You're no man, you're a BOY! Now give me that lifestyle!"
So when you go into a relationship, I presume that you DO know the "meaning of giving without expecting something in return" and you give to the guy without expecting anything in return, right? LOL.
"LOL", yes I do. I was raised to be considerate of others, to be generous, able to give and not always expect something in return. I've certainly had no shortage of people in my life trying to take advantage of that though.
But it's not "okay." Look at how the women respond. It's with outrage, like "oh, you refuse to provide for me? Then you suck! Go die! You're just bitter and your genitals are probably small! You're no man, you're a BOY! Now give me that lifestyle!"
I don't need a rich man... and I really don't care how much money a man has or doesn't. What I really care about is what does he do with what he has? If a man makes $200k a year and spends $201k a year--sorry, he's not desirable, he's foolish. But a man who makes $45k a year and spends $40k a year (or better yet only spends $38k--which means he's saving 15% like me)--he's the kind of man I am interested in. He thinks similar to me when it comes to finances and we would get along. It's not the raw numbers that matter, it's the financial wisdom.
I think most women *are* this way... this is how they consider money. And I would think (and hope) most men are this way too when they consider women.
OK, but let's say a man is the $45K earner who spends $38K. How many women are attracted to that? If you're being honest, it's fairly few. Even the people on here mock guys who make $45K and drive a Civic as "losers." It's not "well, I am only looking at your finances to see how responsible you are." Or if it is, it's like "good, you're only spending $38K, that leaves $7K for me to spend."
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