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Old 09-18-2009, 02:19 PM
 
6,561 posts, read 12,894,069 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mir86 View Post
haaaa!! you gonna kick me out of bed too if I call you nice?
I'm not in a position to be kicking ANYONE out of bed at this time..... Call me whatever you want....
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Old 09-18-2009, 02:32 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mir86 View Post
sad but true
Hi mir86,

Some of it is just defensive. When I walk the streets, I identify what I call "hot girl mode". Attractive women are extremely vulnerable to unwanted attention. If they made eye contact with just anyone, they would be getting harassed routinely and they usually are anyway. It usually is more of an issue for women but some men, especially in some micro climates, tend to use this aloofness to deflect more attention than they are willing to handle.

One good way to feel this effect is to go to one a carnival. Walk though the gauntlet of those guys trying to hustle you into one of those game booths. I do something similar to hot girl mode.

Some are just jerks but this is also a factor.
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Old 09-18-2009, 03:04 PM
 
4,868 posts, read 7,365,812 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gwynedd1 View Post
Hi mir86,

Some of it is just defensive. When I walk the streets, I identify what I call "hot girl mode". Attractive women are extremely vulnerable to unwanted attention. If they made eye contact with just anyone, they would be getting harassed routinely and they usually are anyway. It usually is more of an issue for women but some men, especially in some micro climates, tend to use this aloofness to deflect more attention than they are willing to handle.

One good way to feel this effect is to go to one a carnival. Walk though the gauntlet of those guys trying to hustle you into one of those game booths. I do something similar to hot girl mode.

Some are just jerks but this is also a factor.
haha! makes sense! I think I'm very average "girl next door" looking, but I still am very vulnerable to unwanted attention (I dont' get it..maybe I look approachable?). I definitely do the aloof thing because I don't always want the attention since most of the time the guys are being vulgar and inappropriate or I can't tell if they're genuinely interested or just looking to get laid. its a shame that nice guys are too afraid to approach women, how hot she is shouldn't matter. but I also think the women who are cruel and shoot men down like dogs are to blame. I'm guilty as well..but I was only the type that would avoid their calls or become "too busy" instead of saying "not interested" but at least I was never downright cruel and evil.

Like someone mentioned above, women don't want a man who's too scared and can't stick up for himself..it makes me feel unsafe and like I can't rely on him. in biological terms, he wouldn't be able to protect a woman and her children either, or in general.
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Old 09-18-2009, 03:13 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mir86 View Post
haha! makes sense! I think I'm very average "girl next door" looking, but I still am very vulnerable to unwanted attention (I dont' get it..maybe I look approachable?). I definitely do the aloof thing because I don't always want the attention since most of the time the guys are being vulgar and inappropriate or I can't tell if they're genuinely interested or just looking to get laid. its a shame that nice guys are too afraid to approach women, how hot she is shouldn't matter. but I also think the women who are cruel and shoot men down like dogs are to blame. I'm guilty as well..but I was only the type that would avoid their calls or become "too busy" instead of saying "not interested" but at least I was never downright cruel and evil.

Like someone mentioned above, women don't want a man who's too scared and can't stick up for himself..it makes me feel unsafe and like I can't rely on him. in biological terms, he wouldn't be able to protect a woman and her children either, or in general.
Yep i wish women like men would realize from the other side how hard it is for a man to approach a women and put himself out there like that to not only get rejected but have women make them feel like how dare they even approach thme it makes you feel like crap..I realize its hard for women getting hit on all the time and trying to filter guys out isnt easy but try to be a little nicer especially to the guys who dont come off as jerks..

As far as the protection thing i never got that..Protection from what?? The boogie man??
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Old 09-18-2009, 03:20 PM
 
Location: Everybody is going to hurt you, you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for-B Marley
9,506 posts, read 17,798,297 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JBT1980 View Post
Yep i wish women like men would realize from the other side how hard it is for a man to approach a women and put himself out there like that to not only get rejected but have women make them feel like how dare they even approach thme it makes you feel like crap..I realize its hard for women getting hit on all the time and trying to filter guys out isnt easy but try to be a little nicer especially to the guys who dont come off as jerks..

As far as the protection thing i never got that..Protection from what?? The boogie man??
I never cared for hurting people's feelings but some men don't think your no is a real no if you're not firm when you say it; not mean, per se, just firm. They become very persistent if you're 'too nice'.
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Old 09-18-2009, 03:26 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Whyte Byrd View Post
I never cared for hurting people's feelings but some men don't think your no is a real no if you're not firm when you say it; not mean, per se, just firm. They become very persistent if you're 'too nice'.
I can see that..Thats why from the start tell them as nice as u can your not interested..I realzie easier said then done..

Thats one of the reasosn im so passive to appraoch women..I picture her in her head thinking whens this clown gonna leave me alone
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Old 09-18-2009, 03:31 PM
 
4,868 posts, read 7,365,812 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JBT1980 View Post
Yep i wish women like men would realize from the other side how hard it is for a man to approach a women and put himself out there like that to not only get rejected but have women make them feel like how dare they even approach thme it makes you feel like crap..I realize its hard for women getting hit on all the time and trying to filter guys out isnt easy but try to be a little nicer especially to the guys who dont come off as jerks..

As far as the protection thing i never got that..Protection from what?? The boogie man??
I imagine it must be tough, but would the guy rather be single forever or possibly eventually get a "yes" from someone? because he will get that "yes"..and like whyte byrd said, some of them don't take a no..so you have to be firm.

protection..hmm...good point...but something about a weak man just isn't attractive..sort of like a super tough, mega assertive woman can be a turn off to some men.
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Old 09-18-2009, 03:32 PM
 
4,868 posts, read 7,365,812 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JBT1980 View Post
I can see that..Thats why from the start tell them as nice as u can your not interested..I realzie easier said then done..

Thats one of the reasosn im so passive to appraoch women..I picture her in her head thinking whens this clown gonna leave me alone
well are you a clown or something?? lol
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Old 09-18-2009, 03:34 PM
 
4,262 posts, read 4,699,210 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mir86 View Post
well are you a clown or something?? lol
lol no but as u said women get hit on so often its hard for them in a short time to filter people and distinguish if this guy is not like the past 100 dudes who hit on her..
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Old 09-18-2009, 03:37 PM
 
4,262 posts, read 4,699,210 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mir86 View Post

protection..hmm...good point...but something about a weak man just isn't attractive..sort of like a super tough, mega assertive woman can be a turn off to some men.
But what is a weak man??


Im as laid back as u can get and really not into arguments and confrontation unless necessary but it doent make me weak or that i wouldnt stand up for my girl or self i just dont care to stress myself out and argue over the smallest things like some women like to do..

Just because i may give in or in my mind not give a shyt in certian situations doesnt make me weak or spineless but in a womens eyes it might i guess..
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