Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I have to wonder about "good parenting", with most households today both parents gone all day working. Who is doing the disciplining? Can children be well adjusted and well behaved when parents give attention only on the weekend? And that is suspect as well, as the weekend is adult's time to unwind from a hectic all-consuming job. Such a quandary.
I have to wonder about "good parenting", with most households today both parents gone all day working. Who is doing the disciplining? Can children be well adjusted and well behaved when parents give attention only on the weekend? And that is suspect as well, as the weekend is adult's time to unwind from a hectic all-consuming job. Such a quandary.
That is probably the case in many homes, but I know many moms who stay how nowadays. In fact almost all my friends do and the ones that don't are busy going to soccer, football and dance on weeknights and weekends. They are willing to make sacrifices to do what is best for their children. If you are going to have kids, you must be willing to give up some if not most of your "me" time, at least while they are really young. Grab it when you can so you won't get burnt out.......In the long-run, kids are well worth it!
I have to wonder about "good parenting", with most households today both parents gone all day working. Who is doing the disciplining? Can children be well adjusted and well behaved when parents give attention only on the weekend? And that is suspect as well, as the weekend is adult's time to unwind from a hectic all-consuming job. Such a quandary.
I don't work so my husband and I do all the disciplining of course. I worked for a few years part-time, but my husband and I always worked separate shifts. There was a year that I put my kids in a montessori school and I let them stay after class a few times to play in the childcare area ~ maybe about 3-4 hours a week.
cremebrulee, I think it is again very naive to say that the kids in the waiting room would be 'fixed' by spanking them. Who said they needed fixing anyway? One can ignore the rude, you know. Were the kids having fun? Were other people left wounded and bleeding? Probably not. Do we need to hurt our kids to teach them that our society has stupid rules of behavior that rob us of our ability to play? However, in our society, what they were doing is 'unacceptable' and the failure lied with the parents, occurring LONG before that visit to the dentist. You are proposing an easy fix, one that only succeeds in creating people who are afraid. If behavior modification is best delivered through pain, we are indeed a sick society. There are other methods and the parents of those kids probably gave up. To them, it was easier to do nothing. Parenting is a difficult role, the most important one given to us. Our 9 to 5 jobs pale in comparison.
To say that the effect isn't long-lasting or dangerous is also naive. Everyone is different and physical pain affects everyone differently. While there might not be any irreparable damage, a spanking parent can easily turn into a betrayal in the eyes of the child. There are too many psychological issues at stake. Better alternatives are needed and worthy of exploration. Personal childhood and individual parenting experience is not enough to form a solid opinion. A consensus approach is essential in resolving this issue.
Yes, indeed, the kids were having fun...at my mother's expense....excuse me, but I don't think your getting it...SHE'S 90 years old...she shouldn't have to put up with other kids running into her...she was getting blood transfusions every other week, therefore her skin was very fragile and could bruse and bleed easily....and I'm not about to explain why these kids were bad...they were, they were bad and unrully....Were they having fun...sheesh? Yeah, they were having fun, one almost pushed my mom over on the floor....
An easy fix...sheesh, yes, an easy fix, first off, when we went to any public place, we were taught to be quiet...and were taught to respect the other person's space...we whispered in the doctors office, and people still do that...some other people are trying to read, or just plain do not feel good, b/c they have a tooth ache, or are just trying to unwind, from a day of tension and stress at work, and then you're forced to put up with somone else's unrully kids....
Geeze Louise, again I say, pain??????? Honey, there is a difference between a spanking and abuse....and if we are talking about pain....
why don't you people do something about sexual abuse? I mean, if you really want to help a kid, and talk about pain...what about sexual preditors who go for kids...do you realize how prevelent that is...??????
Please, you have to learn to disconnect the words abuse/pain/danger from the word spanking...two complete opposite ends of the spectrum...period. What you are doing is exhaugerating the word spanking.
We can take any consensis report for the nay sayers and those who are for spanking and each will come up with their own numbers...so that doesn't do it for me.
I have to wonder about "good parenting", with most households today both parents gone all day working. Who is doing the disciplining? Can children be well adjusted and well behaved when parents give attention only on the weekend? And that is suspect as well, as the weekend is adult's time to unwind from a hectic all-consuming job. Such a quandary.
Thats right, so ya gotta spank em doubly hard, just because?
Beautifully stated GregW.......but some people do not think of it as violence. It is using the threat of pain so what else can you call it, really? I know people who spank and it does not appear to be abusive or violent but it is still striking another human being and that is just wrong.
Ok, what GregW described is not a spanking, but abuse, plain and simple...and GregW...I'm so sorry you had to endure this kind of treatment....
anyway, I can strike you, or I can spank you, there is definately a difference....and don't look to forward to it, yanno
According to the story: "The fatal beating happened after Zeigler stayed home from work to make sure his wife was following his discipline plan, Stickler said."
So Zeigler thought this was a "discipline plan," not abuse. He was a first time father and maybe he thought this was how he was raised. The media hasn't said a thing about his upbringing.
I realize 99.999% of most people would never do something like this but you have to wonder what some people really would do and where they draw the line at abuse. For some parents, I think they believe, if they survived it, it's good enough for their kids.
UB50...
OK, fatal beatings....now this is exactly what I'm talking about, this is completely over to the opposite end of the spectrum, this is abuse...this is NOT what most of us here are expressing...this is beatings, beyond moral fibers of the human soul...but, it is not spanking....and to be honest....there must be something really menatally wrong with this man....how could there not be? I mean, come on, please, lets not get carried away here and sensationalize to prove your point....this is NOT what we are talking about...this is abuse.....period.
Here's an article I just found on Google news: Mother's lawyer: Child killed for failing to say 'please' - CNN.com (http://www.cnn.com/2007/US/11/28/child.remains.ap/index.html?iref=mpstoryview - broken link)
From the story:
So they beat the kid to death? This is what is scary about spanking kids and other forms of punishment. Some parents don't know where to draw the line.
yeah, I am sure if there was a law againts spanking these disgraceful sick son of a b*tchs would have thought twice before they beat this poor child to death!
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
