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Unwanted early attention might be a factor in why many of the more shy, potentially nicer females later become uninviting to men. But I don't see that as something males can do much to fix (horny, insensitive teens follow their instincts). It's more a thing for schools to address, via discipline and dress codes. Personally the only time I ever witnessed it was by a teacher, and some of us later mentioned it to an adult.
Also, women who went through that as teens frankly need to do what they can to get over it. And women who get unwanted attention from men have, in my opinion, probably only one possible fix, which is to figure out how they can present themselves in a way that's less creep-friendly without being sexless. I will speak out against most cold-approaching and other misguided male behaviors online, but I don't know if guys will listen.
This is the reality. A certain way of dress automatically attracts the creeps of the world.
This is the reality. A certain way of address automatically attracts the creeps of the world.
I see no reason why women CAN'T dress "sexless" if that's the way they feel more comfortable. Goodheathen wants women to NOT dress sexless. Well I'm sure many women would prefer that as well, but if sexless is the only way they'll feel comfortable, they should go for it. Their own comfort should always come first.
I see no reason why women CAN'T dress "sexless" if that's the way they feel more comfortable. Goodheathen wants women to NOT dress sexless. Well I'm sure many women would prefer that as well, but if sexless is the only way they'll feel comfortable, they should go for it. Their own comfort should always come first.
I agree. I'm with you. Women should be able to dress as they wish.
Unfortunately, very revealing dressing in this day and age attracts the wackos, the weirdos, the psychos, and the freakos, and we all know there are plenty of those nowadays. Look at what's being discussed in this thread. Scary.
I agree. I'm with you. Women should be able to dress as they wish.
Unfortunately, very revealing dressing in this day and age attracts the wackos, the weirdos, the psychos, and the freakos, and we all know there are plenty of those nowadays. Look at what's being discussed in this thread. Scary.
I agree, very revealing dress is just not worth it, for all the grief it brings. I'm not suggesting that we blame the victim—a woman should be able to dress however she pleases without men behaving like apes.
But most of us learn at a very young age that it's not worth the harassment, the creeps, the awful comments. Dressing even modestly feminine isn't enough, sometimes.
I once was harassed while wearing the most unattractive, tent-like poncho.
Women should do whatever makes them comfortable. If men complain, too bad. We shouldn't have to put up with this. Our comfort comes before their desire to look.
Also, look at how often one of the first questions put to a rape victim is "what where you wearing at the time of the attack"? I'll never forget a comment from my first boss when I was in my early 20s. He said "some of these women who are raped were asking for it."
I agree, very revealing dress is just not worth it, for all the grief it brings. I'm not suggesting that we blame the victim—a woman should be able to dress however she pleases without men behaving like apes.
But most of us learn at a very young age that it's not worth the harassment, the creeps, the awful comments. Dressing even modestly feminine isn't enough, sometimes.
I once was harassed while wearing the most unattractive, tent-like poncho.
Women should do whatever makes them comfortable. If men complain, too bad. We shouldn't have to put up with this. Our comfort comes before their desire to look.
Exactly!
If one lives where the land is chock full of snakes, it's best to wear boots outdoors, whether or not one prefers to wear sandals.
We are surrounded by wackos and nutjobs and psychos, and it's not a matter of whether women have the right to dress revealing. It's a matter that we are surrounded by nutjobs and psychos, and they go insane when they see women dressed in very revealing fashion.
Unless, of course, we find a way to get rid of these sickos.
When I was growing up many women didn't wear bras, halter and sheer tops were popular, and guys didn't go all psycho stalker on them. What changed? They did notice and sometimes whistle and say woo-hoo out of a car, and drive on, no entitlement to have the woman. I'm sure there were always exceptions but it was not a thing to expect a girl in a summer halter top and short shorts to have sex with whoever.
I started to see that in the late nineties when some women I know were propositioned in the daytime going about their business, and not even wearing very revealing clothing, just something like a shorter dress or a form fitted jacket. That is about the time thongs were being marketed as underwear. Ouch.
When I was growing up many women didn't wear bras, halter and sheer tops were popular, and guys didn't go all psycho stalker on them. What changed? They did notice and sometimes whistle and say woo-hoo out of a car, and drive on, no entitlement to have the woman. I'm sure there were always exceptions but it was not a thing to expect a girl in a summer halter top and short shorts to have sex with whoever.
I started to see that in the late nineties when some women I know were propositioned in the daytime going about their business, and not even wearing very revealing clothing, just something like a shorter dress or a form fitted jacket. That is about the time thongs were being marketed as underwear. Ouch.
God I wish I knew. If I knew why there are suddenly so many psychos and wackos out there joining PUAs and all kinds of crap, I'd for sure publish a book and get very wealthy. Something went wrong somewhere along the way in this country.
God I wish I knew. If I knew why there are suddenly so many psychos and wackos out there joining PUAs and all kinds of crap, I'd for sure publish a book and get very wealthy. Something went wrong somewhere along the way in this country.
I think the music/video scene might be partly responsible. My growing up years were back during the days of real singers and song writers. Some of the best were poets. My fondest memories are of getting a new album by artists like James Taylor, Gordon Lightfoot and John Denver. We had hard rock in those years too but nothing like the trash young people are exposed to now days. We didn't have the near X rated sex and violence videos either. All you have to do is take one look at a Miley Cyrus music video to see how desperate young people are to essentially be vulgar. Women are openly called every vile name in the book in these videos. It has had a corrosive effect on the public.
I learned to wear a minimizer by 14. DD's are a problem when you're in high school. I used to wear a minimizer and a baggy t-shirt to avoid the unwanted attention.
I think this is the more prevalent strategy. To wear baggy clothes, oversized men's shirts, and the like.
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