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I am from the United Kingdom (Northern Ireland specifically). Trust me when I say the superficial nonsense that is so important to so many tens or hundreds of millions of Americans isn't as important where I come from. Some of the responses in this thread prove that. They tell the OP to get surgery, straighten teeth, but don't address the real problem, which is that people are simply too geared towards judging someone based solely on physical appearance. There's even a thread in the fashion forum where some bird asks if it's better to pursue plastic surgery rather than a university degree. Sad sad sad,
If people are less judgmental on appearances where you're from, why are you so unhappy? You had a thread about being ugly, as I recall. If you're not living in Ireland now, maybe you should move back.
A guy that is considered not attractive to the opposite sex will be able to be more stylish, fit, educated, and a better personality.
But, as far as first impressions go, he will almost always never win there, and will have to have an amazing social network, or a job that deals with people on a day to day basis.
Unattractive guys need to be happy with who they are, and where they are in life. Confidense will probably be his most attractive feature. Having more money than a lot of people won't hurt either, so confident and lucky, or confident and successful.
But he will never have the life of someone in the same situation that is considered hot. The hot guy will win out 9 outta 10 times. And the hot guy will be smart enough to network that last 1 outta 10 times, and it cycles from there. And it NEVER ends.
A guy that is considered not attractive to the opposite sex will be able to be more stylish, fit, educated, and a better personality.
But, as far as first impressions go, he will almost always never win there, and will have to have an amazing social network, or a job that deals with people on a day to day basis.
Unattractive guys need to be happy with who they are, and where they are in life. Confidense will probably be his most attractive feature. Having more money than a lot of people won't hurt either, so confident and lucky, or confident and successful. But he will never have the life of someone in the same situation that is considered hot. The hot guy will win out 9 outta 10 times. And the hot guy will be smart enough to network that last 1 outta 10 times, and it cycles from there. And it NEVER ends.
Most people who believe they are ugly are actually not. They require fixing and more maintence.
Unless they are physically deformed they are not ugly.
Everyone has unique features which makes us different.
it doesnt mean that their ugly
Everyone has access to a dentist, dermatologist, a barber or a hairstylist.
There are some things you can not help. Your facial symmetry, your unique features and bone structure can't be altered correctly (Micheal Jackson) but the most important features can.
Maya Michelle and Gemma look completely different but they are both extremely attractive becuase they have the basics.
Everybody can't be a Kelly Hu or a Uldoz Wallace
But you can get close to it...
Imagine Hallie berry with buck teeth with yellow stuff on it, facial scars, overweight with messy hair. Facial symettry or not she's going to be considered ugly. Get my point? Ugly is a choice
there must be a way to make some improvements and be more more desirable. (apart from surgery)
nothing wrong with wanting to improve and make an effort.
go to the gym?
eat better food?
expensive clothes?
what would help?
post some ideas
I have posted up on this many times - certainly, you can work out and get ripped, you can dress better, get a better haircut, etc. Look at Arnold - he was not born a "pretty boy" but he did OK. I think the average "blah" guy out there could get to a 7 or 8 on most gal's radar if he would develop his body to the maximum extent it can be developed to. That's a lot of work, but, most worthwhile things are.
That said, would have to know what exactly is holding you back, before I could make a specific suggestion for you. If you have partial hair loss, you *may*, if it's bad enough, be better off with a buzz cut or shaved head. Some guys can pull off a shaved head well, some can't. If you really need a nose job, well, save up and do it. You can work around a problem like that but IMHO better to face facts and fix what's not working.
Picking up on what Veyron said - by all means your teeth have to be in good condition. At least clean. You could go for straightening and/or whitening, but clean teeth and good breath, decent oral health, are a must. And attainable by essentially anybody. Ditto for general hygine, but you probably already have that in hand.
Work on your career, and beyond that do *something* that can make you proud of yourself. If you don't like the guy in the mirror, nobody else will either.
I am from the United Kingdom (Northern Ireland specifically). Trust me when I say the superficial nonsense that is so important to so many tens or hundreds of millions of Americans isn't as important where I come from. Some of the responses in this thread prove that. They tell the OP to get surgery, straighten teeth, but don't address the real problem, which is that people are simply too geared towards judging someone based solely on physical appearance. There's even a thread in the fashion forum where some bird asks if it's better to pursue plastic surgery rather than a university degree. Sad sad sad,
American girls are not really geared towards physical appearance either. Game is paramount everywhere.
Women may initially care a lot about how you look, but it's more about how you carry yourself. Most women after you talk to them tend to forget about how you look anyway. The only ones who will fight their urge to like you because you are ugly are very superficial ones. They're more concerned about having a guy to look good in front of their friends, and you really don't want those types anyway.
I think being sure of yourself, and accepting yourself will definitely rub off on others. I think this is genuinely a more attractive quality. What happens when you get plastic surgey and fix yourself up, but still have the same issues with women? I mean what you're looking for is the easy way out. And yeah if you have the money, you can definitely do a ton of stuff to fix yourself up. But at the end of the day, the most unattractive characteristic of a guy is a low self esteem. No woman is going to tolerate a guy with a low self esteem or no confidence in himself, no matter if you're the most attractive guy on the planet. So before you start putting a lien on your mortgage to go for plastic surgery, maybe you can do what's hard and free and work on building up your self esteem. Because there really are no shortcuts.
Dear "ugly man".
I have been in love with someone people might call ugly, well, most of everyone I know calls him "icky", he is also 11 years olden than me. I have always been an ice queen, end even though I got married (bad marriage) and had kids, never really felt physical attraction or the reason to engage in sex, i just sort of went along with it. However, when I met my guy, it was an immediate sexual reaction, something was awakened in me that I had never felt before!!! I have always worked in a very male-dominated field, also, I ran a business for 5 years, so there was never a shortage of interaction with guys. I would say 99% of guys I meet consider me very attractive (and I am from Europe, which seems to be an additional turn-on), and will try to hit on me, whether 17 or 70 years old. So, over the years, I have been hit on probably close to a thousand times...yet, absolutely nothing. For a while I was suspecting that I was maybe a lesbian? Then, my ugly guy came into my life, and he drives me absolutely insane with the feelings and desires that are produced within me. He is very smart, but shy, he can't even talk to me without blushing or stuttering, and I just find him absolutely perfect in every way. But, he rejects me completely (he is in a bad marriage as well), and he hasn't even talked to me for about 6 months now. Nothing ever happened between us, other than being very innocently friends for a blissful 5 months in 2011/2012. But, he is the one for me, my ugly guy, in my eyes he surpasses all other men. So, ugly is just a thing, a very outwardly and subjective thing, and it does not define you, in any way, nor how you will attract women. There are studies that actually suggest that being ugly is an advantage when catching someone :-). So, chin up, you are the one that is "all that" for someone out there, just don't be like my ugly guy, who is turning away from someone who loves and desires him dearly and hopelessly. Have confidence in yourself, the last thing you want is that your sweetheart fights your insecurities, because you can't accept that a "hot" girl wants you.
Haven't read the thread but i just speak from my own experience. confidence is what attracts me. Looks aren't that important unless he has a beer belly i hate that or is really out of shape. Women aren't as physically attracted to men just based soley on looks! it's confidence in yourself that matters.
Dear "ugly man".
There are studies that actually suggest that being ugly is an advantage when catching someone :-).
Please site one, I am skeptical. I could not help but notice that you feel in love with an ugly guy *after* you had multiple kids. And your assymetric logic is interesting.... men hit on you frequently because you are very attractive, but a man being ugly is of no consequence. Did you do a city data search for "ugly guy" to find this two year old thread?
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