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If only there were some other appendages that could do that.
Much of it is symbolic, a feeling based on belonging totally and fully to someone for those few minutes..an arm up there would not produce the same feeling of being "one" with your partner.
I don't know about that. Having someone's junk in your mouth is pretty damn intimate.
When I say intimacy in THIS context I am talking more about the connection and feeling of closeness between the two people during the act, which is for me most intense during intercourse.
Obviously, relationships should not be based 100% on sex. However, would you be able to stay with someone if their sex was not pleasing you. What if they only were able to provide you with good sex when they were drunk? If you were to break up with them would you tell them the reason that you no longer wanted to be with them was because their sex was not good?
I would stay with them..especially if you love them. The good thing about sex is that practice makes perfect. Maybe you could coach them on what you like and be specific about it. Their practice will be your pleasure!
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Beautiful Disaster
I would stay with them..especially if you love them. The good thing about sex is that practice makes perfect. Maybe you could coach them on what you like and be specific about it. Their practice will be your pleasure!
No, practice does not make perfect. And lots of things, like chemistry, can't be taught. This is a myth in near all aspects of life.
Much of it is symbolic, a feeling based on belonging totally and fully to someone for those few minutes..an arm up there would not produce the same feeling of being "one" with your partner.
An arm? Dear me. Please remember you don't speak for all women ... you don't even speak for all heterosexual women.
- Porn should NOT be used as an "online tutorial." Porn is (overwhelmingly) for the visual stimulation of men, and does not generally depict what many women will like, and even if it does depict what SOME women like, we don't all like the same things. The #1 mistake depicted in porn that men need to avoid with most women (that I know of) is lack of sensuality/"jackhammering." You do not make love to a woman as though you were exposing things for a camera, assuming there is not a camera in your bedroom! Most of us like more bodily contact. Watch films with "love scenes" instead. And no, they need not be "chick flicks." I can recall a scene in one of the Underworld movies (the first one I think) between the main characters that was HOT. That is porn for ladies. Have those sexual moves in your playbook and many/most of us will appreciate it.
- There is more to sex than PIV or oral. Lots more, potentially. Bad sex happens when partners don't communicate effectively (verbally or nonverbally!) about what "does it" for them. For one of the posters, PIV is the ultimate experience. Some women say that men need to bring their oral game. Some of us don't especially like oral. I can't even talk about the things that rock my world without most posters wanting me to shoosh about my "lifestyle" already LOL but suffice to say....some of us are kinkier than others. And that's OK, whatever it is that does it for consenting adults...as long as we are communicating our needs to our partners, they are reading/hearing our signals and no one is shutting down on the needs of their partner. For instance, I have known LOTS of hetero men who like um...a certain particular kind of stimulation. And LOTS of hetero ladies who respond with "eww!!" to that act. If your partner thinks that your thing you like is gross, you're gonna have a bad time. Not everyone (male or female) likes the same stuff. What should be a glorious loving relationship would optimally involve people who trust each other enough to be vulnerable, reveal their needs, and partners who care enough to do their best to fulfill them. I think that as soon as one partner doesn't care about the needs of the other, or shuts down in response to the other one's kink or sexual appetities or whatever....it can be the beginning of a lack of connection, respect, consideration, love in the relationship. That's what I'd be worried about in a "bad sex" situation.
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