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How do I stop feminists from attacking my wife just because she is considered traditionally beautiful and feminine
I support genuine women's liberation, but not separatist feminism, which hurts women and is sexist. Those who do not unite with men, echo the same hatefilled sexism of the sociobiologists who say that there is something eternal in the male-female conflict.
The women I sided with are more radical than the feminists in my book, because they go to the root. But the feministas have viciously attacked them as being stooges for men like me personally.
In one talk I mentioned that, Xena and the Amazons could be seen as a positive role-model, and that I champion physical muscular fitness in women.
Thats when the slanders and attacks on my wife began. Since she doesn't have a bodybuilder type body, but is more traditionally beautiful. So they are saying despite all my rhetoric I'm still a man. In public they asked me wife incredibly humiliating personal and sexual questions about her relationship. She doesn't know much about politics, so they made her look like a fool. Many of her answers were those of a traditional wife, so now I'm being blamed for her personality.
And in their newsletter they published incredibly crude and graphic descriptions of our supposed patriarchal intimacy. They compared us to apes, saying that despite claiming to be modern, I was just the alpha male of the tribe and taking the prettiest girl as my mate.
My wife feels terrible, and is very depressed and humiliated, and she blames herself thinking that shes caused me harm. The more she tries to explain that she loves me, and wants to be a good wife, the more patriarchal she makes our relationship look.
What should I do to diffuse the situation?
I can't understand why you are associating with such bigots. I would stop having anything to do with people so stupid and narrow minded. You have nothing to prove to them.
How do I stop feminists from attacking my wife just because she is considered traditionally beautiful and feminine
I support genuine women's liberation, but not separatist feminism, which hurts women and is sexist. Those who do not unite with men, echo the same hatefilled sexism of the sociobiologists who say that there is something eternal in the male-female conflict.
The women I sided with are more radical than the feminists in my book, because they go to the root. But the feministas have viciously attacked them as being stooges for men like me personally.
In one talk I mentioned that, Xena and the Amazons could be seen as a positive role-model, and that I champion physical muscular fitness in women.
Thats when the slanders and attacks on my wife began. Since she doesn't have a bodybuilder type body, but is more traditionally beautiful. So they are saying despite all my rhetoric I'm still a man. In public they asked me wife incredibly humiliating personal and sexual questions about her relationship. She doesn't know much about politics, so they made her look like a fool. Many of her answers were those of a traditional wife, so now I'm being blamed for her personality.
And in their newsletter they published incredibly crude and graphic descriptions of our supposed patriarchal intimacy. They compared us to apes, saying that despite claiming to be modern, I was just the alpha male of the tribe and taking the prettiest girl as my mate.
My wife feels terrible, and is very depressed and humiliated, and she blames herself thinking that shes caused me harm. The more she tries to explain that she loves me, and wants to be a good wife, the more patriarchal she makes our relationship look.
What should I do to diffuse the situation?
First off, tell her you DO LOVE Her, no matter what others think. She is the most important person in your life. And don't hold back giving her little things, maybe for no reason bring home some roses or what ever flowers she likes. No special ocassion, but just because you want her to know she is the love of your life no matter what is going on.
AS for the ones who attacked her, kick their a$$ by pointing out anything that shows a side of them that they don't want out in public. Thier embarrasment can be a sweet uplifter for your wife. Do it out of Love for your wife.
But if you can't, find someone who will. Sometimes, we have to do things to defend those we love that we wouldn't want to do. And politics can be very bitter, and harmful to those in politics as well as their families.
The bad thing about politics, is once you are in the ring, there are no pivate moments. Someone somewhere is out to get you.
I had that happen to me when I ran for an office once. I had no clue going in how bad it would be, and that was just at the county level. But hey, they all knew I was in that race in both parties!
Can I ask was the ones asking the questions of your wife sane? or just perverts? Point out publicly they had no right to go after her. Besides, are these people suppose to be beautiful? (point out their version of beautiful isn't everyones- point, King Solomon's Song in the Bible; that woman was huge! nose over hangs a city? Belly has rolls like the hay in the fields? beauty can be point of view) Point out any and all of their flaws to them personally, then publicly if there is no apoligy to your wife publicly or privately (which you then make public that person said they are sorry) from them. Seriously, they had no right to ask her about private momenrts with you.
I'd still like to know why he isn't encouraging his wife to post her side of the story here so we can get a fuller picture. I guess he doesn't believe in that much freedom.
When I criticize the feminists, I don't want to give off the impression, that I'm anti-feminist with the connotations that come with it in 21st century America. I consider myself more radical than the feminists, as a Woman's Liberationist.
Look I'm no expert on feminism or women's liberation. Although I was the only male in my college to take classes in women's studies. But the political issues involved in the status of women spill over into my area of interest.
The feminist separatists refuse to cooperate, because they see anything associated with men as tainted, even if it is to the benefit of women. From my point of view they aid male supremacy by isolating themselves.
I did my best to have a liberated marriage, but to be fair, there were always other things distracting me, so I may have failed to correct my wife when she acted in an improper role. And I deserve blame for that.
My wife has been influenced by the culture around her, on what a women should be. All of her friends and sisters are in rather traditional marriages. And the media and entertainment industry bombards her with brainwashing.
If I hide my wife away, that will make me look even more patriarchal.
My wife is certainly not stupid. I think that my wife is highly intelligent. It is just that in this culture, attractive women are rewarded and reinforced for being ditzy and "cute". Obviously in the environment I'm part of such behavior is frowned on.
For example I told my wife she doesn't have to do any housework, and not to buy any sexy lingerie. But on the other hand I will admit that perhaps I have not been vigilant in preventing her.
I initially wished to have an open marriage, in which we would both be free to have relations with other people. She objected. But I still let her know that I don't have any problem with her "cheating" on me, or even leaving me, since I don't believe in possessing human beings.
Just to be clear I'm a women's liberationist not some traditional guy. This is a factional dispute. And the feminists are using my wife as a battering ram against me. I DONT support women being "traditional" wives. Thats just an accusation against me. The problem is that my wife gives "traditional" answers, which she assumes are the "right" answers wives are supposed to give. I always say that my wife is just my buddy, pal, friend, associate, partner. We're both kind of young, and don't really know how to play the role right. She trying to play the role of wife, I guess, and I'm trying to write a whole new script.
Although I will concede I probaly did not put enough work into making my wife a modern New Woman, and now its come back to bite me.
Look not to be Adam pointing the finger at Eve here, but this is kind of HER fault. I never did anything to make her into a traditional wife. The only thing I can be attacked for is marrying a girl of her type in the 1st place, and thats not why I married her.
Well I never really accepted the position that women in this society chose their position, so it would be hypocritical to suggest that my wife is the exception.
Just to clarify, my main political activities don't center around woman's issues, but to the extent that they do I side with a particular faction. But its not my focus.
My wife is not foreign born. Although I suppose you could say that bringing her into my world, is similar to introducing the concept of Republic, to a medieval peasant.
I tried to introduce her to the idea that our marriage is just a friendship. And to dress in suits more, and to treat her like a man etc. I admit that it is mostly my fault. I didn't put enough time into making her a New Woman, I suppose I just thought my New Values would just rub off on her naturally.
Its not about a man dominating a woman. Its about more advanced ideas correcting backward habits.
She has to be dragged into the 21st century. A revolution from below and from above.
This is a joke right? You've got to be kidding right?
If I were your 'wife' I'd divorce you and run like hell to get away from you.
New woman my as*
The personal is political. And if my wife does not live up to my own standards of a New Woman, then the feminists can use it against me to show I'm hypocritical.
I can't ignore them, since it is important that the women's faction I support maintain the upper hand, if my other projects are to have their support.
You wouldn't happen to be a Scientologist would you? Oh never mind, even THEY aren't this crazy!
All I'm trying to do is build an equitable relationship. Aristotle believed it was in a slave's nature to be a slave.
You are a slave to your male ego.
Enjoy.
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Do it out of Love for your wife.
