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I haven't done OLD since I've been in the area, but I've looked at the profiles and I know people who have done it. Hey, the men aren't all that, either. They, too, lie about their body types, as well as their age and marital status. As you say, you have to do a lot of sifting to get the gold nugget.
I can see a bit of usefulness in that you can narrow the field down to those with common values (religion, diet, etc.) and kid status. But other than that, let the buyer beware--for both sexes.
Completely agree. Both sexes can lie all they want. One thing I can tell any man (not sure if its the same the other way around) is that if a woman doesn't have any pics other than her face posted you can bet her body isn't attractive.
Let the buyer beware goes for in person or the online route. Most women I see out and about after work are with girlfriends and therefore unapproachable unless they talk up a man first. Chatting two women up is an epic challenge and usually not welcomed since women like to focus on convo between the two of them (or more) with disruption from a stranger. I think we would all like to meet people at the grocery store or bookstore but how many people do you know nowadays where that actually happens? As much as I love my smartphone it has become a huge distraction in our society.
If I go to a nice restaurant and a woman is by herself eating dinner or grabbing a drink I'll chat her up if she is sitting next to me. Other than that the friend route doesn't guarantee anything and the bar scene sucks in my opinion.
Completely agree. Both sexes can lie all they want. One thing I can tell any man (not sure if its the same the other way around) is that if a woman doesn't have any pics other than her face posted you can bet her body isn't attractive.
Let the buyer beware goes for in person or the online route. Most women I see out and about after work are with girlfriends and therefore unapproachable unless they talk up a man first. Chatting two women up is an epic challenge and usually not welcomed since women like to focus on convo between the two of them (or more) with disruption from a stranger. I think we would all like to meet people at the grocery store or bookstore but how many people do you know nowadays where that actually happens? As much as I love my smartphone it has become a huge distraction in our society.
If I go to a nice restaurant and a woman is by herself eating dinner or grabbing a drink I'll chat her up if she is sitting next to me. Other than that the friend route doesn't guarantee anything and the bar scene sucks in my opinion.
The male equivalent to women's lack of full-body pics is hats. If he doesn't have any photos without a hat, you know he's balding or involuntarily bald and self-conscious about it. Height, too. If a man puts anything from 5'7" to 5'9", it's a 50-50 shot he's really two inches shorter than what he claims. Guys shorter or taller than that tend to be more honest about it.
Man or woman, I also wouldn't bother with someone who is wearing sunglasses in every photo so you can't see the person's eyes. What is the person hiding that he/she doesn't want anyone to be able to recognize them either online or in public? Married? And if the profile has the age set in the mid-30s or older, it's fair-to-middlin' that person is lying about his/her age by more than a few years and when you see him/her in person, the wrinkles will give it away. I learned that the hard way when I tried OLD 10 years ago when I was 39, and a couple of the guys who put their early 40s were 50 if they were a day when I met them in person.
I don't think the grocery store or bookstores are a great idea, either, with the exception of Kramerbooks, where chatting up strangers is pretty much expected.
Approaching, and being approached, in public has its own set of challenges, though. Then it's all about initial physical attraction. If you have a "particular," like say you're a vegetarian, when does that come up? And how much does it matter? Online, people will assume, "Oh, one of those. Probably going to moo at me if I order a steak." In person, you'd find I'm not that way, but then three or four dates in, you learn I'll never cook you a meal with meat in it, then what?
I guess it boils down to dating being a PITA no matter how you cut it!
The male equivalent to women's lack of full-body pics is hats. If he doesn't have any photos without a hat, you know he's balding or involuntarily bald and self-conscious about it. Height, too. If a man puts anything from 5'7" to 5'9", it's a 50-50 shot he's really two inches shorter than what he claims. Guys shorter or taller than that tend to be more honest about it.
Man or woman, I also wouldn't bother with someone who is wearing sunglasses in every photo so you can't see the person's eyes. What is the person hiding that he/she doesn't want anyone to be able to recognize them either online or in public? Married? And if the profile has the age set in the mid-30s or older, it's fair-to-middlin' that person is lying about his/her age by more than a few years and when you see him/her in person, the wrinkles will give it away. I learned that the hard way when I tried OLD 10 years ago when I was 39, and a couple of the guys who put their early 40s were 50 if they were a day when I met them in person.
I don't think the grocery store or bookstores are a great idea, either, with the exception of Kramerbooks, where chatting up strangers is pretty much expected.
Approaching, and being approached, in public has its own set of challenges, though. Then it's all about initial physical attraction. If you have a "particular," like say you're a vegetarian, when does that come up? And how much does it matter? Online, people will assume, "Oh, one of those. Probably going to moo at me if I order a steak." In person, you'd find I'm not that way, but then three or four dates in, you learn I'll never cook you a meal with meat in it, then what?
I guess it boils down to dating being a PITA no matter how you cut it!
Haha, yeah, you're reminding me of some of that awkward pain in dating. Just feeling out of sink, out of touch with someone you're possibly interested in. But then there were also some great, spontaneous moments that just clicked as well. So, I'm still glad to have gone through it. I think the awkward times make the good ones that much sweeter.
There are so many places that couples meet its sometimes funny just hearing some of the stories. I know a guy who met his wife from a car accident. Granted it was a minor fender bender. And yes, things are different today with cell phones, internet, etc... But even back then, I was never one to approach a group of girls at a party or other social venues with pick up lines. That was way too awkward and cheesy! Many times I would wait for some kind of confirmation that there was a bit of interest there. Social venues like school, night classes, church (for me) were some of the more natural settings where I got to 'know of someone' before actually asking them out. I can remember a number of times a girl's friends would have to clue me in that I should ask her out since I was pretty clueless. That tended to help out. Without that social environment and some knowledge of the person, a frame of reference, it was just too odd for me. Though some can walk up to a stranger and wind up hitting it off. That just wasn't my thing. So don't feel bad if that approach isn't working for you.
Maybe the online dating thing is simply a way to 'wink' at someone to show them there may be some interest?
Although this article relates to college campuses, the skewed gender ratios apply to places like Washington DC where there are way more single women than men. Part of the reason DC is so careee driven and competitive is because of the skewed gender ratio. Women compete from everything from careers to physical appearance. The ratio is worse than it seems because of the high number of homosexual men.
Although this article relates to college campuses, the skewed gender ratios apply to places like Washington DC where there are way more single women than men. Part of the reason DC is so careee driven and competitive is because of the skewed gender ratio. Women compete from everything from careers to physical appearance. The ratio is worse than it seems because of the high number of homosexual men.
I think you've made your point. Time to let this thread die and enjoy the holidays.
Although this article relates to college campuses, the skewed gender ratios apply to places like Washington DC where there are way more single women than men. Part of the reason DC is so careee driven and competitive is because of the skewed gender ratio. Women compete from everything from careers to physical appearance. The ratio is worse than it seems because of the high number of homosexual men.
I actually find this fascinating and agree to the extent of what I have read although I will have to do some of my own research. However, I totally agree with regards to aggression to even include forums when the ratio is skewed. Often you find a lot of hostility and aggression by posters you would have taught were men. Often, one comes to find out that these aggressive posters that you initially thought were men are actually women and at times often either bi or gay. Nothing wrong with that but it is the reality. In this case of this section, you have either the tough women, the screamers, and or the miserable. The rare passive feminine or middle lane women rarely stick around as oppose.
Same for men- you often can notice when the more perceived feminine types, not necessarily gay, often seem to patronize these aggressive women. It's sort of natural connection and unity. Of course they too may be gay or asexual (lacking attraction to neither women nor men). But there are certainly exceptions but energy is energy. People reveal a lot through their postings as they would in real life but often don't realize their previous self-revelation postings while in their current space.
Approaching, and being approached, in public has its own set of challenges, though. Then it's all about initial physical attraction. If you have a "particular," like say you're a vegetarian, when does that come up? And how much does it matter?
And I say this all the time. People have been exposed to many types of people and most often gravitate to who they are familiar with. If you come from a place like the Midwest, you will often find the people here extremely attractive, despite character flaws. But if you come from the more Urbanized or ethnic rooted NE or West Coast, it will take time. Some people are willing to open up while others prefer to stick to their own cultures such as the blacks, Latinos, Europeans, and Middle eastern. Culture pairing is a huge thing although many people think this is a myth. This is why the Serbians flock together, work together in the same night clubs, date each other, etc.
Omg, I just couldn't slog my way through this thread without commenting. I am not that pretty, have gained a ton of weight as I've gotten older (which I'm working on), and while I have a (BS) degree, I currently only have a part-time job. I went to high school in MD and know DC/VA well. Despite my "short-comings" I have no doubt that I could get a date with just about any straight, available man I was interested in (I'm married now) because I'm a good listener, can tell a joke and like to meet people (all kinds). When I was single, my single friends would say, how do you do that? They would go to bars and sit there all night waiting for some guy to approach. I met men in grocery stores, laundromats, getting gas, etc. Daily, by being approachable and friendly. I can assure you, the problem isn't meeting men, it's that there are so few people (gay, straight, male, female) willing to be real. Maybe it's time to stop playing games OP and start calling the shots. Demand to be treated with respect or put on your walking boots. Treat people with kindness and compassion and you will find love.
DC Metro dating odds favor men. There are just not enough men, plain and simple and men there know it. They take full advantage of it. If a man in the DMV tells a woman he is having problems finding a woman then that translates into, he can't decide which one. I know so many wonderful women in DC that can't even get a date but in other cities get asked out left and right. DC men are social and economic climbers in every area of their life including relationships so most women feel they have to list credentials. They could be unemployed, uneducated and living in their parents basement and still expect a high powered career woman to support them so they can brag to the rest of their unemployed, uneducated friends. The high powered educated men do the same. If they just want to sleep with you they don't care. Alot of men in DMV including Baltimore are on the down low so there is that dynamic.
Alot of men that come to DMV from other places couldn't get women where they were before so now they take revenge on the women in DMV that are willing to have a relationship. They act like they are all that and more. Remember guys you are the same person you were before you moved here.
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In person, you'd find I'm not that way, but then three or four dates in, you learn I'll never cook you a meal with meat in it, then what? 
Without that social environment and some knowledge of the person, a frame of reference, it was just too odd for me. Though some can walk up to a stranger and wind up hitting it off. That just wasn't my thing. So don't feel bad if that approach isn't working for you. 
