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Do realize, if you pay this bill, you will be paying and paying and paying. Because the bad behavior hasnt stopped. You just bailed him out. It won't be long before he will need that electric bill paid again, or something else. And he will come to you, because you will pay. People like this can smell a sucker a mile away.
Just be prepared to do this again and again and again.
For the highlighted reasons above, you should help. It's family. Your brother never did anything bad to you, did he? Even if he did, your nephews and nieces are innocent and they are your family members, right? Can't you do it for the kids?
I think, deep down, you know what the right thing is to do here.
Maybe you are right but what if my brother is a serious gambler and this will just let him gamble more money away? (People see him playing Blackjack all the time.)
I'm sorry that your immediately family will only associate with you if you give them money. That is truly sad. If you want to buy a family, you can probably find people who will be much kinder to you, for less money.
I say no, do not give them the money, and if they chose to not have a relationship with you, it is their loss. If they are mean to you over it, then maybe you need to find a way to not take that sort of abuse.
I haven't read all the posts, but from the first one it seems your brother isn't good at repaying loans. If you can easily afford to gift him the money, gift it. It probably won't be the last time he needs money, however, so what's the limit?
When my late father-in-law died, I told his widow that if she needed any financial help to just ask. I didn't like her (she treated me like pond scum), but she was family, and I'd recently sold a business and had lots of spare cash. The key being that she was family. While I'd have given her a bundle if she needed it, without the spare cash I'd still have helped out with whatever we could have afforded. She didn't need it. (Whew!) But if she had, it would have been due to the early death of her husband, not because she didn't watch her spending.
This has got to be your decision. Don't put too much stock in what we say, as we're not in your shoes and don't know how important family is to you. Good luck with making the right decision for everyone involved.
You owe your brother nothing!!! Family members have such a wonderful way of making others feel responsible (manipulation at its best) for something they had no part in. Been there done that.
Yes, it's really too bad about your brother. No one wants to see someone in that position, but history seems to repeat itself....right? My best advice to you is to walk away from this. You cannot fix what has happened. It is simply a bandaide approach until the next event. Do yourself a big favor and move away from ths one. And ... And have a serious talk with your father ... Not in anger, but attempt to make him see the reality of the situation. There is no winning in this one. Good luck to you!
No one likes to see someone they love suffer for any reason. My Dad in his wisdom often said that "some people just have to learn the hard way' and my dear Mother would say "you made your bed and you will have to lay on it"...SUCH IS THE CASE WITH THE BROTHER
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