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I don't remember them ever sleeping together. That's what I've told her as well, she should live her life and see other people. She was so offended she could almost hit me. She said "Who do you think I am?! I keep my name clean."
Good for your mother. It's commendable that she has such high standards. You should be very proud! You know, it's entirely possible that your father has scarred her so badly, that having another man in the picture, is TOTALLY out of the question. Maybe she's just fine with him pestering someone else, because he leaves HER alone. Okay....well, probably not OKAY with it, but has simply shut herself off from it, in order to block some of the pain.
Apparently, she's smart enough to know that "it will all come out in the wash". He's a cruel, cheating pig. Why should she join him in that behavior? It's entirely possible that she grew up seeing men cheat, therefore, in her mind, that's just the way men are.....they can't be trusted and ALL men will eventually cheat. It's also entirely possible that your mom is asexual. Was she "guilted" into a marriage, because that's what women do, and she never WAS into the sexual aspect of the relationship? Yes....BTW, that IS possible.
I haven't read all of this thread, but have you tried talking to your dad about his cheating? If you haven't, I think it's kind of crazy. He's the one you ought to be going to and talking to. He's the one you should be confronting. Maybe it's time you had a good chit chat about how he treats YOUR mother! If more adult kids had the stones to confront their "wayward" parents about their behaviors, relationships might stand a chance. Instead of sitting and letting this crap brew in you, you need to have a talk with daddy. What's he going to do...ground you? take way your inheritance? Tell him how you feel!
Good for your mother. It's commendable that she has such high standards. You should be very proud! You know, it's entirely possible that your father has scarred her so badly, that having another man in the picture, is TOTALLY out of the question. Maybe she's just fine with him pestering someone else, because he leaves HER alone. Okay....well, probably not OKAY with it, but has simply shut herself off from it, in order to block some of the pain.
Apparently, she's smart enough to know that "it will all come out in the wash". He's a cruel, cheating pig. Why should she join him in that behavior? It's entirely possible that she grew up seeing men cheat, therefore, in her mind, that's just the way men are.....they can't be trusted and ALL men will eventually cheat. It's also entirely possible that your mom is asexual. Was she "guilted" into a marriage, because that's what women do, and she never WAS into the sexual aspect of the relationship? Yes....BTW, that IS possible.
I haven't read all of this thread, but have you tried talking to your dad about his cheating? If you haven't, I think it's kind of crazy. He's the one you ought to be going to and talking to. He's the one you should be confronting. Maybe it's time you had a good chit chat about how he treats YOUR mother! If more adult kids had the stones to confront their "wayward" parents about their behaviors, relationships might stand a chance. Instead of sitting and letting this crap brew in you, you need to have a talk with daddy. What's he going to do...ground you? take way your inheritance? Tell him how you feel!
If my mother hasn't been with anyone else throughout the years, I think that's a real pity because she truly deserves someone that treats her well. She made many sacrifices for us (like staying with when we were sick while my father went out at night).
Talking with my dad? No way. He would simply go away and say it's none of my business. He isn't exactly very careful about not being caught so I don't think he cares about my opinion.
Sometimes I wonder how his last moments will be like when he's on his deathbed. If some of his grandsons are still there, he'll be more than lucky.
P.S. My 93 year old grandfather already took care of our inheritance. He will give 75% of my father's share to my brothers and I. My father will only get 25% of he was supposed to.
If my mother hasn't been with anyone else throughout the years, I think that's a real pity because she truly deserves someone that treats her well. She made many sacrifices for us (like staying with when we were sick while my father went out at night).
Talking with my dad? No way. He would simply go away and say it's none of my business. He isn't exactly very careful about not being caught so I don't think he cares about my opinion.
Sometimes I wonder how his last moments will be like when he's on his deathbed. If some of his grandsons are still there, he'll be more than lucky.
P.S. My 93 year old grandfather already took care of our inheritance. He will give 75% of my father's share to my brothers and I. My father will only get 25% of he was supposed to.
David, the thing of it is, you need to remind your father that it IS your business, because she IS your mother. Clearly, your father isn't a man who gives a crap about protecting his wife, so that falls on your shoulders, as her son. Someone needs to stand up for her. Be the kind of son who will stand up for his mother. If you really care, as much as you claim to care on here.....you'll stand up for her. Don't just complain and vent about it....DO something about it.
David, the thing of it is, you need to remind your father that it IS your business, because she IS your mother. Clearly, your father isn't a man who gives a crap about protecting his wife, so that falls on your shoulders, as her son. Someone needs to stand up for her. Be the kind of son who will stand up for his mother. If you really care, as much as you claim to care on here.....you'll stand up for her. Don't just complain and vent about it....DO something about it.
His father is an adult and whether we like it or not, he doesn't have to give him an explanation. The most he can do is to help his mother get a divorce.
His father is an adult and whether we like it or not, he doesn't have to give him an explanation. The most he can do is to help his mother get a divorce.
No, his father doesn't HAVE to give him an explanation, but that doesn't mean that our OP doesn't have the right to confront him. He's got as much right to confront him, as his father has to deny him an explanation. Either way, "David" can at least go on with his life, knowing that he told him what he thinks of him. It's all up to the OP. Is he the type of person who is going to store up resentment for not saying something? It sounds to me like our OP is already holding on to some resentment, might as well just let 'er rip!
My mother used my father's laptop the other day and found his email open. She saw several emails with highly sexual content and many of them were answers to escort ads.
They had a huge argument and my father said he also had reasons to doubt her. He said he was always suspicious about me (I'm the younger son and the one he likes the least). Therefore he wants a paternity test done on me and my brothers as well.
He's 65 and she's 57. She keeps crying and doesn't know what to do. I know what she should do but she has never left him. In the past he has got two of his assistants and three of his patients pregnant but he always managed to convince them to have an abortion.
Women, any suggestion? I'm okay with the paternity test, there's no way I'm not his son. The nose, the eyes, the mouth are copies of his. I even have the same birth mark in the chest.
Well sure, he got busted and wants to turn the tables. This is what his kind does.
If she knows the truth, nothing he says, no matter how hurtful, will change it. If he wants a paternity test, tell him to get it. She should leave him, for obvious reasons, but when you are in that kind of relationship for that long, it's not likely to happen. She's probably already beaten down and doesn't feel she deserves better.
^^ Agree! Creeps like him are relentless when it comes to making someone else feel guilty for THEIR indescretions. "It's your fault I cheated on you! If you would/wouldn't have __________, I wouldn't have had to cheat! You made me do it!"
Castration is almost too humane for someone like that.
David you may not want to that that of your Father. He has proven himself to be untrustworthy.
I know he's untrusthworthy but like I said, I can't forget he slept right next to my room when I was a kid. Besides, I really have never seen him do anything creepy when it comes to the grandkids. Just the normal contact you would expect from a grandfather.
If I were her I'd be maxing out his credit card on trips to Hawaii and any other place I wanted to go to. A person like him will screw her over in a divorce. You say he's already hidden money with his brothers which she will have an impossible time getting back. When it comes up in a divorce that he has impregnated employees and patients he will likely lose his license and income and end up in jail (he probably already knows this) so she will be screwed over yet again. Time to take care of herself in a practical way after putting up with all this insult and injury.
I'm not condoning him in every way but I've to say something when people here are suggesting he's a potential pedophile. He never touched me or my brothers with a finger besides beatings.
Davidjk,
Based on what you've posted on this thread, I definitely wouldn't say that your father is a PEDOPHILE because those sexual exploits were with willing adults. However, I would suggest not to dismiss those posters who have brought up the issue of pedophilia. You don't know the experiences of the posters. Some of them very well could know a lot more about what can and does happen in family situations similar to yours. Your father has never sexually touched you and your brothers, which is great. Do you have any sisters? Can they say the same? Some pedophiles will molest and/or rape children of either gender while other pedophiles get sexually excited for only one gender. I've known of personally of a few cases where there was a young boy and young girl in the home but the man in the family only molested the girl(s) and never the boy. When the mother was away at work, usually the boy was sent outside to play or to do some errand by the man so that it would give the man time to be alone with the young girl with no one else around.
Again, not saying that your father is a pedophile. However, as other posters have pointed out based on his sexual behavior which he has been acting on for decades now even to the point of engaging in unethical or illegal circumstances (in some cases) it is not out of the realm of possibilities that the door of the downward spiral of looking for new sexual "excitement", "conquests", or "experiences: has happened: child molestation and/or rape. Your nieces (his grand-daughters) could be in danger of becoming, if not already, younger versions of his "hottie" female patients and assistants, in his mind. Just saying...
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David you may not want to that that of your Father. He has proven himself to be untrustworthy. 
