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First off at 5'4 most women will find that height to be unattractive. You said you are below average so yes that is ugly. Personality/confidence is NOT the most important thing (Women say that to make them seem less shallow).
What you need is Status, friends as social proof , social skills, a nice hair cut and dress style. With that said, unless you are of VERY high status YOU WILL NOT get a hot girl even if you update your life. If you are a 4 in life, upgrading your life will just turn you into a 5 meaning you can only get girls that are between 3-5 in looks. Now if you were a short celeb it can turn you from a 4 to an 7-8 simply because you have crazy status women love.
Is this really a TRUE and ACCURATE assessment of women? All that women go for is money, looks, status and social skills? I mean, what if a women is with a man who loses his attractiveness, ability to make money, social status, etc? Does she immediately leave him and find someone that does?
These are the type of things that really get me to questioning. For example, are we really forming loving relationships or forming alliances of convenience instead? For example, as long it is convenient for me I will stick with this person but will leave when it is not convenient?
But perhaps this is not my point. Again, if women are after money, power, status, looks, etc and, as a result, certain men are not able to get women (let's say - in keeping with the spirit of the OP - a guy is 'too short') is there any shame in that? Is there any shame in not being able to attract women for any of the above reasons? For example, what if a guy has all the qualities that define manhood and lend to a stable relationship - maturity, character, intelligence, responsible, hard working, good communicator, sense of humor, etc - and despite all that is not able to attract women? What does that say? Who is really at fault here? Who should feel a sense of shame? Is there any inadequacy in this scenario?
As the title suggests. 31, never had a girl friend, still a virgin.
My height (5"4) and looks probably go against me but I wouldn't say I'm completely ugly - say below average. If personality/confidence is the most important trait its maybe fair to say I'm lacking in self confidence/self-esteem but I'm not a nervous bumbling idiot. Everyone who knows me says I'm not shy and fairly outgoing. It's difficult to be super confident when you have a past with no success. I signed up for online dating yesterday - got friends to vet my profile etc.......messaged 9 women so far, 7 haven't replied.....26 have viewed my profile......nothing.
I definitly can't do anything about my height, nor much about my looks if thats the problem so I've always figured its my confidence and personality I need to work on. I'm even seeing a therapist who practises CBT to try and change any negative thinking or limiting beliefs I have. I've read up on trying to be playful/funny/cheeky/flirting etc as well.
By my counting I've asked out/fancied 38 women in my life time......they've all said no. I've only ever successfully initiated a kiss with 3 women ever, the other times its always been the women.
Millions of men meet up/hook up with women every single day - I have a friend whos slept with over 40 women, another whos had about 12 girl friends...but me, 31 and nothing? Why am I so different? I really don't believe I'm that un-desirable.....but I'm beginning to wonder. There are some tings in life people will never do - be a professional sports player, get that job they wanted, have kids......is it also true to say that plenty of people will just live live forever single?
Its crazy how uncommon this is to the point its almost laughable. Should I just give up & accept it? Anyone got any ideas or experience with/met anyone similar who's turned this around?
Never surrender. Get your passport and travel the world. On this globe, somewhere, you will find a group of women who will be more receptive of your disposition. Here in America, the women like tall hyperaggressive men who are abusive.
Quote:
Originally Posted by BrunoMars
Do a google search and you'll find plenty of stuff on men in their 50's & 60's totally single.
Yea, that's because they live in America where older men are pushed into this box where they can only date women their own age. No 50/60 year old man wants to date a women his own age so they're stuck being single.
Never surrender. Get your passport and travel the world. On this globe, somewhere, you will find a group of women who will be more receptive of your disposition. Here in America, the women like tall hyperaggressive men who are abusive.
Yea, that's because they live in America where older men are pushed into this box where they can only date women their own age. No 50/60 year old man wants to date a women his own age so they're stuck being single.
Tall men who are abusive.....how come I see plenty of women with men who don't fit that description? Where do you get that information?
As for your comment about older men...fine if they don't want to date women their own age, but there are only a small handful of younger women who want to date much older.
Here are twenty of Hollywood's finest shorties:
5'0"
Danny Devito
5' 2"
Dudley Moore
5' 3"
David Faustino
5' 4"
Emilio Estevez
Richard Dreyfus
Jason Alexander
James Cagney
Rick Moranis
Seth Green
5' 5"
Michael J Fox
Dustin Hoffman
5' 6"
Jack Black
Daniel Radcliffe
Bob Hoskins
Elijah Wood
Woody Allen
I've done a lot of thinking about this, there's a lot of reasons I've been unsuccessful. It's not solely down to my height & looks. After thinking about this & reading up on other area's I think the main problem is lack of confidence or historical reference.
I can't do anything about my height, it's never actually bothered me except when I'm standing next to really tall people. Maybe my looks are't that bad; I can't remember the last time someone told me I was ugly. The things I can change are my personality and my outlook. Confidence breeds success I suppose and vice versa - the boost I got from just talking to those 2 girls on the train a couple of pages back was huge. I think I'll just start off small - concentrate initially on brief conversations with no outcome dependency and take it from there.
I've done a lot of thinking about this, there's a lot of reasons I've been unsuccessful. It's not solely down to my height & looks. After thinking about this & reading up on other area's I think the main problem is lack of confidence or historical reference.
I can't do anything about my height, it's never actually bothered me except when I'm standing next to really tall people. Maybe my looks are't that bad; I can't remember the last time someone told me I was ugly. The things I can change are my personality and my outlook. Confidence breeds success I suppose and vice versa - the boost I got from just talking to those 2 girls on the train a couple of pages back was huge. I think I'll just start off small - concentrate initially on brief conversations with no outcome dependency and take it from there.
I am.....he's told me the best way to overcome this is to actively approach and engage women. He said we can talk about negative thoughts & limiting beliefs all we like but nothing beats the power of action. From this he said I should then look at how things go in a positive way and that any rejection is not a bad thing and that it should be looked upon as a learning experience.
First thing I would suggest is a change in your wardrobe. Secondly, you need to work on the physical.
Exercise does wanders and will not only make you feel better but look better. Find a couple of hobbies and get out here and learn to talk to different people. You don't have to be a master conversationalist. Just get out there and get to talking. Ask questions. Show interest. Get moving dude.
Online dating is a waste if you don't have it all in the looks department. You are going to have to compensate the lack of physical attractiveness with a better personality. Start exercising, talk to your GUY FRIENDS about improving your game, and just get out and starting enjoying life.
Tall men can be quite unsuccessful with women as well. What do you say there?? I think it all depends on the female. If all she does is cling onto a stereotype. Why the hell do you want to be with such a closed minded individual??
btw who cares about the 15 that kisses you. If the other two women did that the same night then you were obviously being played.
Confidence man and in case anyone is wondering I'm over six feet tall.
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