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Men who are using Tinder to meet women for sex want to dictate that women should only be there for sex as well. Tinder is not specifically a hook-up app, but many men view it as such when there are both women and men on there who are actually looking for relationships.
I matched with a man on Tinder who tried to deride women who are on there looking for relationships, claiming Tinder isn't for that. I told him it's not his places to dictate how or where people find love because he's the one looking for sex. It absolutely is for people looking to date and men who are looking for sex need to read women's profiles before assuming they are only looking for hook-ups as well.
One of my best guy friends met his fiance on Tinder and her proposed to her after only dating her for six months.
Agreed. There were a few guys on Tinder who wrote something along the lines of "This is Tinder, not eHarmony/Match." As if writing that is going to make women who aren't looking for hookups change their minds.
If it's just an add on, I suppose it's even more puzzling why people would use it if they don't like the results. Oh well, to each his own I suppose. I'm not even sure why I'm I this thread other than curiosity. I'm not looking and I hope the man in my life is with me for a very long time. I can't imagine loving or wanting to be with anyone else.
( my friends ) only use it recreationally and don't put great effort into it so don't exactly get down in the dumps about it should nothing arise..... If many have this opinion on tinder ( in London ) then it would explain a lot about your article
I don't use OLD at all myself so I'm not an expert but only report what I've seen and heard from mates
And I'm always nosey.. Ahem sorry curious like yourself LMAO
You don't know what they are looking for, and they may not themselves. What people are looking for often vary from the person they're connecting with.
Two of the people I ended up hooking up with on tinder were vehemently not looking for hookups and in their 40s. I wasn't looking for one either. But that's what happened when we just went with the flow.
It is the straight version of Grindr, and was I believe created by the same people. Grindr is a hook up app.
Of course people can end up dating people from there, I have a few. But it is, what it is. That's fine, lots of relationships start with hookups.
Tinder is a dating app. I thought Grindr was a gay dating site/app. Since I'm not gay, I'm not familiar with how it works. It said nothing about being a Tinder sex app when I first looked at it. Even when it shows how the app works, it is presented as a dating site (showing two people talking about meeting for coffee). If it gave me the impression that it was a sex app, I wouldn't have joined, as I'm not looking for that. And now there's Tinder Social where people can meet to hang and out do activities. Tinder also shows what common friends and interests you have on Facebook. If it was all about sex, why would it be set up this way?
When you look at the description of Tinder in the screen captures I shared, it says nothing about it being a sex app. Of course adults who choose to do that, it is their choice. But at the end of the day, Tinder is a dating and social app and lots of people are on there looking for someone to date.
Agreed. There were a few guys on Tinder who wrote something along the lines of "This is Tinder, not eHarmony/Match." As if writing that is going to make women who aren't looking for hookups change their minds.
And for men who say things like that to me, I say to them, "This is not a porn or web cam modeling site and I am not a porn actress. If you are looking for sex chat and nude photos, there are women who do that, but they charge by the minute. If you want sex, go hire a prostitute. Have a nice day!"
Then I block them and report them for sexual content.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,981,862 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Atlanta_BD
Tinder is a dating app. I thought Grindr was gay dating site/app. Since I'm not gay, I'm not familiar with how it works. It said nothing about being a Tinder sex app when I first looked at it. Even when it shows how the app works, it is presented as a dating site(showing two people talking about meeting for coffee. If it gave me the impression that it was a sex app, I wouldn't have joined, as I'm not looking for that. And there there's Tinder Social where people can meet to hang and out do activities.
When you look at the description of Tinder in the screen captures I shared, it says nothing about it being a sex app. Of course adults who choose to do that, it is their choice. But at the end of the day, Tinder is a dating and social app and lots of people are on there looking for someone to date.
Of course not, it has evolved. When it came out, it was a hook up app and marketed itself as such, since it was the gay version of grindr which was really an early foray into gay apps (a move away from things like ManHunt which was web based).
But lets realize what it came from. It started as a hook up app. People can use it for whatever they want, of course. I mean, people can use OKC for social and business networking too. I think its horrible for dating. While I have dated people I met there, it was really bad for it since deal breakers and general compatibility that could have been determined on a real dating site isn't available on Tinder. I mean, people do get lucky though, sure.
Tinder Social is brand new, things change, but again, not its original intent.
As a side note, if one looks at the revisions of its (Tinder's) Wiki over the years, its really amusing how it went from "hook up" app to "swipe" app, and how the wording has changed about its history.
Of course not, it has evolved. When it came out, it was a hook up app and marketed itself as such, since it was the gay version of grindr which was really an early foray into gay apps (a move away from things like ManHunt).
But lets realize what it came from. It started as a hook up app. People can use it for whatever they want, of course. I mean, people can use OKC for social and business networking too.
Tinder Social is brand new, things do change.
As a side note, if one looks at the revisions of its (Tinder's) Wiki over the years, its really amusing how it went from "hook up" app to "swipe" app, and how the wording has changed about its history.
I don't know what it started out as, as I just joined Tinder a few months ago. And again, being that I'm not gay, I don't know or care about what Grindr is or how it works. I know Tinder Social is new. It just came out since I've been on it.
If Tinder has evolved as you claim, obviously the men on there haven't since they assume all women on there are looking for sex. And it's not just Tinder. Every dating site I have ever been on, men message me about sex when my ads clearly state I am looking for a relationship. Horny men simply see dating sites and apps as an opportunity to get an easy lay because they are too cheap to hire prostitutes, I guess. They'd rather try to manipulate women looking for relationships into giving them free sex instead.
Whatever the case, I'm glad Tinder has evolved because I have met way more quality men from all over that I was never able to meet on traditional dating sites. I also get far more matches on Tinder than on traditional sites so...
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,981,862 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Atlanta_BD
I don't know what it started out as, as I just joined Tinder a few months ago. And again, being that I'm not gay, I don't know or care about what Grindr is or how it works. I know Tinder Social is new. It just came out since I've been on it.
If Tinder has evolved as you claim, obviously the men on there haven't since they assume all women on there are looking for sex. And it's not just Tinder. Every dating site I have ever been on, men message me about sex when my ads clearly state I am looking for a relationship. Horny men simply see dating sites and apps as an opportunity to get an easy lay because they are too cheap to hire prostitutes, I guess. They'd rather try to manipulate women looking for relationships into giving them free sex instead.
Whatever the case, I'm glad Tinder has evolved because I have met way more quality men from all over that I was never able to meet on traditional dating sites. I also get far more matches on Tinder than on traditional sites so...
"Free sex"? Most men and women don't pay, people meet, they have chemistry, they have sex.
Men look for sex online. Women do to. It's fairly simple. It's about matching up with what one is looking for. I run across plenty of OKC profiles of women looking primarily for sex too, especially people already in relationships. Not my thing, but each to their own.
It's just easier to match what you're looking for on a dating site compared to an app.
And yeah, I get more matches on Tinder too, but its superficial, I can screen out on matching percentages... which means those matches are less likely to be connections. More people that are less likely to be good matches... I think that's why people use it as a time killer / entertainment mostly.
And evolved in their marketing. Their system is the same as when it was a hook up app, and that's why the results are likely to be the same. Similar system, similar results.
In the end, you can't blame people that are looking to hook up from using a superficial based app. And when so many people, even those saying they are relationship focused or don't do hookups, actually do hookup when its the right person and the right situation, well, that's the way it goes. I don't need any more casual things in my life, but they happen when they happen.
You can blame guys or girls for being crude. Even if one wants to be casual in their relationships, there is no reason for crudeness and classlessness.
"Free sex"? Most men and women don't pay, people meet, they have chemistry, they have sex.
Men look for sex online. Women do to. It's fairly simple. It's about matching up with what one is looking for. I run across plenty of OKC profiles of women looking primarily for sex too, especially people already in relationships. Not my thing, but each to their own.
It's just easier to match what you're looking for on a dating site compared to an app.
And yeah, I get more matches on Tinder too, but its superficial, I can screen out on matching percentages... which means those matches are less likely to be connections. More people that are less likely to be good matches... I think that's why people use it as a time killer / entertainment mostly.
And evolved in their marketing. Their system is the same as when it was a hook up app, and that's why the results are likely to be the same. Similar system, similar results.
All I can say is that I like Tinder and I'm not looking for sex. I don't care what other women do, really. I know what I am looking for and I state it both online and on Tinder--and it's not just sex--and men who write me for sex anyway because they don't read are annoying. While men look for sex online, they don't take the time and read profiles to see if the women they are writing to are looking for that too. They just see a hot woman and sexually harass her. I literally get hundreds of vile, sexual message from men every single day on another dating app I am on and my ad says nothing about sex and my pictures are not even remotely sexually suggestive. But because I'm attractive and turn these men on, they think it's ok to bombard me with disgusting messages and d*ck pics.
It is these men who arbitrarily message woman about sex without reading their profiles first who are trolls that need to hire prostitutes. I had a guy message me the other day who says, "So, I see you are looking for friend with benefits." My ad says no such thing at all and clearly states I am looking for a relationship. He only saw what he wanted to see because my pics turned him on.
My OKC ad clearly states I am looking for a serious relationship yet men message me for sex. I'm not trying to suggest what other people should do. I'm just tired of men asking me for sex when I am clear that that's not what I'm looking for. Just because other women are looking for sex, that doesn't mean all women are.
A woman's mere presence on a dating site/app is not consent for sex.
Last edited by Atlanta_BD; 09-13-2016 at 11:14 AM..
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,981,862 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by Atlanta_BD
All I can say is that I like Tinder and I'm not looking for sex. I don't care what other women do, really. I know what I am looking for and I state it both online and on Tinder--and it's not just sex--and men who write me for sex anyway because they don't read are annoying.
Even if you were looking for sex, it would be annoying. That's classless and not how it generally seems to work.
Because you like to read the point of view and experience of others, you're in a successful relationship and may have some tips. Romantic relationships are more interesting for some than say: Gardening, or Politics
Quote:
Originally Posted by Londoncowboy30
( my friends ) only use it recreationally and don't put great effort into it so don't exactly get down in the dumps about it should nothing arise..... If many have this opinion on tinder ( in London ) then it would explain a lot about your article
I don't use OLD at all myself so I'm not an expert but only report what I've seen and heard from mates
And I'm always nosey.. Ahem sorry curious like yourself LMAO
Ratherbcrazy, that is a very nice, diplomatic answer. But I have only contributed an article about the differences between men's use and women's use of the app. I think LC is right, I'm just nosey. Lol
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I'm not even sure why I'm I this thread other than curiosity. I'm not looking and I hope the man in my life is with me for a very long time. I can't imagine loving or wanting to be with anyone else.
LMAO
