Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
It is strange, but reading these posts, I find that it appears women need men more when we are younger, and men need women more as they age.
I guess it is just another one of those ying/yang kind of differences.
I am happily married to my very best friend ever, and have been for years and years (almost 43) BUT if something were to happen to him, I could never remarry. Would not even be interested in dating honestly, but would still enjoy the company of our many friends, both male and female. Out to dinner/movies/travel without any expectations or commitment would be fine....but nothing beyond being good friends.
It would never be fair to whoever would come behind him to even put him (and me) thru it. Once you have had the best.....
My husband isn't irrelevant. He's the love of my life. But, if he were to pass away before me, I would have zero interest in another man. For one thing, I'm still married to my husband. We wouldn't have divorced...he died. If he were still alive we would still be married. I believe that he's still my husband and I'm his wife/widow. In any case, no man could ever compare to him. We're in our sixties and have been married over 40 years. I hope I get another 40 with him. If not, I'll live with my happy memories of him until we meet again.
My husband isn't irrelevant. He's the love of my life. But, if he were to pass away before me, I would have zero interest in another man. For one thing, I'm still married to my husband. We wouldn't have divorced...he died. If he were still alive we would still be married. I believe that he's still my husband and I'm his wife/widow. In any case, no man could ever compare to him. We're in our sixties and have been married over 40 years. I hope I get another 40 with him. If not, I'll live with my happy memories of him until we meet again.
EXACTLY the way I feel and so well put!!! Tried to rep ya, but gotta spread some love first!!!!!
I think this is IMPORTANT for those single, older men looking. It is NOT that you are irrelevant (to all of the single ladies out there) , but there are so MANY of us still so in love with our current spouses that we just could NEVER feel anyone could replace them! THAT means we got SUPER HUSBANDS!
Praying all of us that feel this way get at LEAST another 40 yrs of bliss together!!!!!!
It is strange, but reading these posts, I find that it appears women need men more when we are younger, and men need women more as they age.
I guess it is just another one of those ying/yang kind of differences.
I am happily married to my very best friend ever, and have been for years and years (almost 43) BUT if something were to happen to him, I could never remarry. Would not even be interested in dating honestly, but would still enjoy the company of our many friends, both male and female. Out to dinner/movies/travel without any expectations or commitment would be fine....but nothing beyond being good friends.
It would never be fair to whoever would come behind him to even put him (and me) thru it. Once you have had the best.....
Not exactly. Maybe in the old days but not today. In the old days (50's woman back), society dictated that woman didn't work, they couldn't have a checking account or get a mortgage.
I am old enough to remember those days but was still a little girl. Society dictated that woman depend on men for money and anytime you depend on another they have power over you. Being observant I realized that some men abused that power, knowing she didn't have the money, education and would be socially ostracized, sadly because of the way it was many of those women are now in poverty.
Today both men and women allow others to have power over them instead of making a goal at a young age to become independent. They make it worse by getting in more and more debt, a debt slave. "I owe, I owe, so off to work I go". Your boss controls a lot about you. Try telling your boss that you just don't feel like going to work for the next 3 months or don't feel like doing anything today.
Not exactly. Maybe in the old days but not today. In the old days (50's woman back), society dictated that woman didn't work, they couldn't have a checking account or get a mortgage.
I am old enough to remember those days but was still a little girl. Society dictated that woman depend on men for money and anytime you depend on another they have power over you. Being observant I realized that some men abused that power, knowing she didn't have the money, education and would be socially ostracized, sadly because of the way it was many of those women are now in poverty.
Today both men and women allow others to have power over them instead of making a goal at a young age to become independent. They make it worse by getting in more and more debt, a debt slave. "I owe, I owe, so off to work I go". Your boss controls a lot about you. Try telling your boss that you just don't feel like going to work for the next 3 months or don't feel like doing anything today.
Dependency is not good, man or woman.
I am in my 60's and understand what you are saying, but I THINK that it still holds true. Even if we were working and could "hold our own", society still dictated the "family values" that is missing today. Women that wanted families HAD to get married back then, so wanting a family meant marriage and finding the "right man" even if you could support yourself. I AM GRATEFUL of that really, because I think the family UNIT is very important!!! The issues is, more and more divorces, more and more single parents, more and more "me" and less "us" and less "family" and boom....we are where where we are today....OBVIOUSLY not a great place.
As we have matured and are now at the "no kids/responsibilities/got our assets and if we loose our spouse probably financially secure stage of our life" as women, it is just different.
Again, after having the PERFECT HUSBAND I have no desire/need/wants for someone to replace him should he leave me first.
This man is SO wonderful I pray daily that if I have to die TODAY, PLEASE let me go first! I can not imagine my life without him he makes me so complete!
Curmudgeon, it sounds like you do a lot. Then again, I remember back times, clearing the table, loading the dishes, DH would flick the switch, I'd unload and then claim he did the dishes. Well he did take the garbage out of the can when asked. I forgot to ask him to replace the bag, I thought it was common sense. Back when I was having a heck of a time getting him to help I was told you have to give full instructions... take the garbage out, put a new bag in, what you view as common sense isn't.
I don't mean to say he did nothing or does nothing, it's much, much, much better, there are many things he did do that I didn't. The yard looks great, the flowers are beautiful in the spring and summer. And other things are more important to me than to him.
Parents, do your kids a favor... teach both boys and girls how to take care of themselves with out a wife or husband. Stop pampering the boys, prepare them for a well rounded list of responsibilities.
Great message to parents. My mother was a fabulous cook but wanted no one in the kitchen wile she was preparing meals so I sat at the bar and watched her intensely. I made sure to tech my children to cook. Unless it was doing the grunt work - fetching things, peeling vegetables, cleaning up, etc. - their mother had no patience with them so they didn't learn from her other than meal planning. It's interesting that each of my sons married women who couldn't cook so they taught them. One of my daughters is now a chef and loves it.
To his surprise, many of them are not interested in dating anybody (not necessarily rejecting him personally), because they (in his words) "find men irrelevant." This is clearly in opposition to the commonly held view that single women in their 60's are anxious to find male partners.
I've found these "commonly held views" to be inaccurate at many ages.
The idea that women in their twenties are busy trying to "trap a man" is so off the mark for our daughters and their friends. The men are pursuing them. As our oldest daughter's new husband put it, "I can have a good life on my own, money in the bank, nice home, the works. But without her, I don't have a home."
Here are three words that can totally change your love life around as they did mine when i was dating.
LOWER YOUR STANDARDS
I hope your wife doesn't see this.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
