We're leaving: goodbye Raleigh (advice to prospective relocators) (Chapel Hill, Wake Forest: condo, chapel)

[OpAck]

Originally Posted by SaucyAussie

Good post. The reason we landed in Raleigh instead of places that may have been a better fit for us, like Austin, Tampa, West Coast, is that all our family, and my job, is in NY. Being a half days drive away has made a huge difference for us. Best move we ever made.

Agreed. In an emergency, it's at most, a two hour flight to Newark. But moving to Raleigh, I felt really comfortable knowing that I can make it to my NJ family in 7 or 8 hours and spend a weekend and maybe a weekday. The best thing I learned is to leave after work...like 4 or 5 in the afternoon on a Friday. It's just after 9 by the time I'm driving thru DC/Balt...and I can make it to the Jersey shore by 1am. Then we've got at least two full days to spend with family, and drive back Monday. Thru the years, we've gone from like, 6 trips the first year...to 4 trips up there...and now with two little boys, we're lucky if we make it up twice a year.

I thought I'd really miss the water though, that seemed to be the hardest part about the move. I mean, I grew up in Toms River and my family had a place in Ortley Beach, NJ. I was always at the beach. But, being just a little over 2 hours to Wrightsville, and a little more to points further south...it's well worth it. And the ocean is just beautiful...I'm not terribly frigid jumping in the water in the months of June, July, September, and October like I was up there.

Bottom line...Raleigh is not going to be for everyone. NY/NJ is not going to be for everyone...Florida is not going to be for everyone...California is not going to be for everyone...people's lifestyles and desires are all different. And you can move to paradise and still run the risk of being miserable after some time.

Originally Posted by knagy389us

Alright, just what I wanna hear! My wife and I are planning a trip down in the next month or so to do a "look around". We sold our "too big" house in Jackson, NJ, and are renting short term in Toms River (Been in this area all our lives)

I just started a job search, and securing a position in the Raleigh area will determine when we can plan to move down. We RV alot and always seemed to travel down that way to places we wanted to visit. It will be nice to be closer to some of them. Opens up a whole new vacation area for us. Also look forward to riding my 2 wheeler out towards the mountains.

Keeping my fingers crossed for a decent job at a decent company!

Yeah, I would definitely find work before moving here. My wife and I did not do that, but this was 2004 when the unemployment rate was all of 5%. I had a relatively good job within two months and my wife found an EXCELLENT job within a few weeks. That probably wouldn't happen in this economic climate, and that goes for the Triangle especially. Jobs are still pretty hard to come by down here.

I've actually seen alot of similarities between Ocean County and Wake County, believe it or not. The biggest differences of course, are how much more spread out things are down here, and of course, less property taxes/real estate. I came right out of college and almost bought a house with my girlfriend in Lacey for $260K. It was a relatively nice two story 1,500 sq ft house with $3,900/yr taxes. It had a great view of the Oyster Creek Nuclear Plant when you stepped out front . That's when we visited my sister down here and absolutely fell in love with the area. We backed out of the deal on that house, moved into a two bedroom apt for 6 months, and bought a brand new 2,000 sq ft house with a huge unfinished space for $170K. Property taxes around $1,300/yr. Looking back, I don't exactly know how we would've survived had we decided to stay up there. Crazy.

[knagy389us]

I lived in Brick/TR for 10+ years, and never was really into the ocean. Had a boat but only did the bay. Not a boater anymore, I'm into the land based hobbies now

We've RV'd to Asheville, Gatlinburg, and OBX recently. I'd be content visiting those places on a regular basis. I have a small family, and everyone does their own thing, so moving away wouldnt be so bad. And like you say, it's not a bad ride. A dozen Krispy Kremes and my ipod - the trip would fly.

Originally Posted by OpAck

I thought I'd really miss the water though, that seemed to be the hardest part about the move. I mean, I grew up in Toms River and my family had a place in Ortley Beach, NJ. I was always at the beach. But, being just a little over 2 hours to Wrightsville, and a little more to points further south...it's well worth it. And the ocean is just beautiful...I'm not terribly frigid jumping in the water in the months of June, July, September, and October like I was up there.

Bottom line...Raleigh is not going to be for everyone. NY/NJ is not going to be for everyone...Florida is not going to be for everyone...California is not going to be for everyone...people's lifestyles and desires are all different. And you can move to paradise and still run the risk of being miserable after some time.
.

[dobguy1]

I agree totally, this place is hard if you are not from here...not a strong work ethic, like a slow methodical machine no doubt....your either in or out...wish Id of known.....Im thinking about packin it up and going back to san diego.....this place is depressing if you are from here......longest 5 years of my life......

[RedZin]

Originally Posted by dobguy1

I agree totally, this place is hard if you are not from here...not a strong work ethic, like a slow methodical machine no doubt....your either in or out...wish Id of known.....Im thinking about packin it up and going back to san diego.....this place is depressing if you are from here......longest 5 years of my life......

I think anyplace you live is pretty much what you make it. It's not like the Triangle area is a banana republic.

[dobguy1]

Ive notice people from here help eac other out , immediate family, friends etc....if your not from here its difficult to navigate, hard place to figure out and u can easily become depressed and isolated.....Its a weird place if your not from here, the bible belt works its own way....easy to find yourself confused if your from say the west coast,,,,,it also has a way of trapping you.......like a well oiled machine that can chew u up if you dont fit in have a good job and friends and med benfitis....Its unfortunate but it can sap your energy rather quickly and leave you pretty much depressed tired and fed up.....Im heading back to SD Calif where at least I know the area.......I came here with 50000 and a camaro and high hopes to beleft with a Chevy tracker and 500.00. Its been a rough ride for me and I hope I can make it out in one piece/..

[RedZin]

Originally Posted by dobguy1

Ive notice people from here help eac other out , immediate family, friends etc....if your not from here its difficult to navigate, hard place to figure out and u can easily become depressed and isolated.....Its a weird place if your not from here, the bible belt works its own way....easy to find yourself confused if your from say the west coast,,,,,it also has a way of trapping you.......like a well oiled machine that can chew u up if you dont fit in have a good job and friends and med benfitis....Its unfortunate but it can sap your energy rather quickly and leave you pretty much depressed tired and fed up.....Im heading back to SD Calif where at least I know the area.......I came here with 50000 and a camaro and high hopes to beleft with a Chevy tracker and 500.00. Its been a rough ride for me and I hope I can make it out in one piece/..

My husband moved here from Michigan 10 years ago with less than 50k and NO Camaro, and he loves the place. He spent 5 of those ten years not knowing me, either, and he wasn't in a serious relationship. He got a job, moved here, and set about enjoying the place. I think that pretty much any place is going to be only as good as you make it.

Did you move here before finding a job? That might be part of what set you off on the wrong foot.

Either way, I hope you are happy back in San Diego. It's a lovely place.

[NCInMyMind]

Originally Posted by dobguy1

Ive notice people from here help eac other out , immediate family, friends etc....if your not from here its difficult to navigate, hard place to figure out and u can easily become depressed and isolated.....Its a weird place if your not from here, the bible belt works its own way....easy to find yourself confused if your from say the west coast,,,,,it also has a way of trapping you.......like a well oiled machine that can chew u up if you dont fit in have a good job and friends and med benfitis....Its unfortunate but it can sap your energy rather quickly and leave you pretty much depressed tired and fed up.....Im heading back to SD Calif where at least I know the area.......I came here with 50000 and a camaro and high hopes to beleft with a Chevy tracker and 500.00. Its been a rough ride for me and I hope I can make it out in one piece/..

I think any place can leave you feeling depressed and isolated if you don't have a job that you enjoy and don't have a support system.

Love San Diego. Would love to be there on a chilly day like tday!

[macjr82]

Originally Posted by dobguy1

Ive notice people from here help eac other out , immediate family, friends etc....if your not from here its difficult to navigate, hard place to figure out and u can easily become depressed and isolated.....Its a weird place if your not from here, the bible belt works its own way....easy to find yourself confused if your from say the west coast,,,,,it also has a way of trapping you.......like a well oiled machine that can chew u up if you dont fit in have a good job and friends and med benfitis....Its unfortunate but it can sap your energy rather quickly and leave you pretty much depressed tired and fed up.....Im heading back to SD Calif where at least I know the area.......I came here with 50000 and a camaro and high hopes to beleft with a Chevy tracker and 500.00. Its been a rough ride for me and I hope I can make it out in one piece/..

I've said this before specifically what I observed about peopel from Cali as it relates to NC. SOCAL peopel tend to hate it. NoCal peopel tend to love it. Though Nocal peopel that come here are those who tend to hate NorCal and think the Berekely brand of liberalisms or the hipster scene to far left. SoCal peopel tend to like where they are from and end up NC through circumstance, not as a destination in of itself. Also, SoCAl people, I notice, don't tned to be happy anywhere but Socal, they might be able to swing a Miami.

On a side note, my first time in Cali at the age of 18, which was San Diego (with trips to LA) I hated it. I didn't get it. I thought everyone was fake. it felt like no one was happy with who they were, and everybody was trying to be something they weren't. Everyone looked nice and was nice on the service, but if you dug a little deeper they seemed real superficial. It struck me as a nice play to visit, but I wouldn't want to live there.


Side-side note, my opinion of the area has since changed, at least about living there, but that's mainly b/c I'm now married with kids so I'd be bringing some "real" peoeple with me, plus I have friends over there.

[bobbis]

Best of luck to you. I can relate.

[Merboy]

Personally I think if you don't have something nice to say about a city that's home to hundreds of thousands of people and rising then you probably should not say anything at all.