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Okay, but only if you guys (the collective "you") promise not to post here expressing surprise and shock that this area turned out not to be what you thought it was. That's really what we're trying to say. If you don't for whatever reason find out what it's really like BEFORE you move here, stop whining about it. Suck it up and try to make the best of it. "Bloom where you are planted."
What is wrong with expressing an opinion about living here? This place is not right for everyone... no place is. This is a relocation forum I think the so called "whining" posts might be more valuable to prospective relocators than the unrealistic Nirvana ones.
Okay, but only if you guys (the collective "you") promise not to post here expressing surprise and shock that this area turned out not to be what you thought it was. That's really what we're trying to say. If you don't for whatever reason find out what it's really like BEFORE you move here, stop whining about it. Suck it up and try to make the best of it. "Bloom where you are planted."
Oh, I am a BIG believer in blooming where you're planted. No doubt about it. When I moved to the Triangle, I had not stepped foot in North Carolina since I was in 7th grade! Yet, if you read my posting history here, you'll see that I am far more likely to praise the area than to complain about it. I made a conscious effort to seek out the things I thought I'd enjoy and learned to embrace this area as my home.
As for the rest of your post and your wish for future residents to "promise" not to whine? Well, I honestly think you're asking too much from humanity. Some people are born complainers. And some of those complainers find their way to this forum where they proceed to vent their discontent. It's the nature of the beast. The good news is that you don't have to respond to the complainers if they annoy you. Just move on to the next thread. Your blood pressure will thank you!
Edit: Just to clarify, I think there's a difference between the complainers and the people who are unhappy yet genuinely seeking advice on improving their situation.
I completely agree. We realized we missed home because it's home and NC isn't not that NC is a horrible awful place to live. We were completely shocked when we got the opportunity to return 8 months after getting here. We had really planned to stay longer and at least enjoy the east coast and take lots of trips. On the other hand, we didn't want to pass up a better job and be able to move right back to our old neighborhood and school!
I guess my biggest complaint about the area is that having come from Texas and not a more expensive state, the cost of everything shocked me. I do wish I'd done more checking before we moved rather then believing the COL calculators. Otherwise, it's lovely and there are lots of things for a family to do. Oh, I also hate the medians everwhere that block you from entering/exiting a store from the road you are on thus causing you to execute fun U-turns. I'm not really sure why there hasn't been more of an outcry about those
The reason for the medians is that in NC we don;t have "feeder" or "frontage" roads like you have along most city freeways in Texas. Remember? In Texas, all of the businesses are lined up along frontage roads along freeways. Not here.
My husband was laid off twice in 2010 - each time by companies here in the Triangle. His career is in a fairly specialized field. He cannot get a job in any ol' city. Availability is limited, so he has to go wherever a job can be found. The jobs available for him on the market now are ALL in cities we've never visited before: Boston, Chicago, Baltimore, Austin, Los Angeles, etc. etc. etc. Heck, one of the companies that has voiced interest in him is in Finland! How do you deal with that?!
I think there is always a difference when someone moves somewhere with a job waiting for them, particulalry after a long (desperate?) period of unemployment. Nobody would say "spend a week there checking it out before you take that job that's going to save you from bankrupcy!"
It's the folks who say "My sister's neighbor's cousin's co-worker told us NC was a great place to live, so here I come, WHEE!! Now somebody tell me where the best neighborhoods are!" and then read two posts here that gush and spew rainbows, spend a weekend here, then move down, bringing their extended family with them. All because of what they heard/read it was like. Either they had a portable job that wasn't an issue, or they presumed they would find a job once here. Then they arrived and learned that "Hey, it's not the Land of Milk and Honey I thought someone on C-D told me it was!" or "Hey, things are really done a LOT differently than they are where I come from, and people aren't interested in my 'advice' on how to do it the way we do!" or "Wow, they said it didn't snow much but nobody told me about the oppressively hot, humid, and buggy summers! Get me out of here!"
The difference is coming here because you HAD to vs coming here because you essentially threw a dart at the map, read a couple of articles or posts, and then showed up expecting pearly gates and streets of gold to greet you, with the inevitable disappointment when it wasn't like that. MrsSteel, in your situation, I think most people would say "congratulations for finding a job when you need one--I hope your new city is somewhere you can fit into" and not blame you for not being able to put the job on hold to do research. It's the folks who don't have the time pressure of a job and yet still don't do research, and then complain later that they were somehow "misled", that make you want to go ""
Good luck to you and your husband in whatever city you land in!
The reason for the medians is that in NC we don;t have "feeder" or "frontage" roads like you have along most city freeways in Texas. Remember? In Texas, all of the businesses are lined up along frontage roads along freeways. Not here.
Many other areas prohibit left turns altogether, even at traffic lights. Sometimes u-turns are part of the process known as "Michigan Lefts", and in New Jersey they keep the traffic flowing by forcing you to do a "cloverleaf" to the right to make a left.
I'll take those any day over Wake Forest Rd's suicide center turn lane....
Many other areas prohibit left turns altogether, even at traffic lights. Sometimes u-turns are part of the process known as "Michigan Lefts", and in New Jersey they keep the traffic flowing by forcing you to do a "cloverleaf" to the right to make a left.
I'll take those any day over Wake Forest Rd's suicide center turn lane....
ah the jug handle. I've wished there was an access road (frontage) on either side of Capital since we got here.
I agree re: choosing to come here because you read it was great and taking the job that'll keep you and the family afloat.
Big difference. I give those folks who pretty much HAD to recolate to here a pass if they wind up feeling unhappy and are trying to make the best of it.
The ones that chose to come here based on some article, without researching the area?
If you don't like it, try to improve your situation or hit the road. I-95 runs pretty far North and South, and you can find your way west from there if you need to.
I find it amusing that anyone who has moved here, but later concludes they would rather live somewhere else, is slammed for not having done proper research. Perhaps their tastes, values or perspectives changed during that time. Maybe the place changed during that time.
You can’t conclude that anyone who moved here and doesn’t like it didn’t do their research, any more than you can conclude that those who like itdid.
^^ And yet, there are people who come on here, admit they didn't really do more than read some posts and come visit for 2 days, then wail to high heaven about how awful it is here. It does wear one out after a while.
I find it amusing that anyone who has moved here, but later concludes they would rather live somewhere else, is slammed for not having done proper research. Perhaps their tastes, values or perspectives changed during that time. Maybe the place changed during that time.
You can’t conclude that anyone who moved here and doesn’t like it didn’t do their research, any more than you can conclude that those who like itdid.
Nah. I'd never do that. If someone came here and said they researched long and hard, had a plan, checked the area out (as much as was feasible), moved here, and then didn't like it, I'd figure they had just as much right to complain as any of the locals who liked it growing up here but hate it now and wish they could move.
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