Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I had my 30th birthday recently and my husband didn't do anything for it. For months leading up to it, I had been telling him that I want to do something special, since I only turn 30 once. We moved away from our family and friends a few years ago and every birthday since has just been the two of us and I miss the big fuss. I gave him hints, like asking our friends to meet us for dinner, or a quick trip somewhere, a night out on the town, something more than what he has done for me on my birthday. (FTR, I have done things for him for his birthday and he hasn't had his 30th yet.)
So my birthday came, we had cake at home and he gave me a gift (that I had picked out and saved a photo on the computer and he went and bought it that day). And that was it. Once the candles were blown out, it was over.
Now, I just found out that a friend of his (a woman that I've met once before) wants him to help her plan a 30th birthday party for a friend of theirs (another woman I met once before) in our city. He said he'd definitely help and be glad to.
I don't get it. He can plan a party for her but can't do anything for me? How am I supposed to suppress my anger when I'm invited to this party, knowing that my husband did this for someone else and not for me?
She shouldn't have to plan her birthday party and you are joining this party a little late as I posted before she gave him a few options to work with because going out of town requires him to take off work or be too much money, so there were a few options and he could have come up with something.
There's more to this story and IMO when a woman feels that something isn't right, usually it's not. Sounds to me like hubby has something else going on and is disguising it as a "friendship" while it may be a little more than that. I also think that the OP is using the 30th birthday, purchase of a new home, etc. as an excuse for what could be the "actual truth".
Many times women will make up excuses for their husbands' infidelities and/or shortcomings because confronting the reality is just to painful. I could be wrong but that's how I read this situation.
Here's what you do. Call this woman up, ask her to tell your husband to give you a big party next month. Problem solved. He will do it. Cus she was involved.
I had my 30th birthday recently and my husband didn't do anything for it. For months leading up to it, I had been telling him that I want to do something special, since I only turn 30 once. We moved away from our family and friends a few years ago and every birthday since has just been the two of us and I miss the big fuss. I gave him hints, like asking our friends to meet us for dinner, or a quick trip somewhere, a night out on the town, something more than what he has done for me on my birthday. (FTR, I have done things for him for his birthday and he hasn't had his 30th yet.)
So my birthday came, we had cake at home and he gave me a gift (that I had picked out and saved a photo on the computer and he went and bought it that day). And that was it. Once the candles were blown out, it was over.
Now, I just found out that a friend of his (a woman that I've met once before) wants him to help her plan a 30th birthday party for a friend of theirs (another woman I met once before) in our city. He said he'd definitely help and be glad to.
I don't get it. He can plan a party for her but can't do anything for me? How am I supposed to suppress my anger when I'm invited to this party, knowing that my husband did this for someone else and not for me?
How innocent can you be? Your husband is bedding this other woman!
I suspect this is not the start of your husband ignoring your needs. Chances are your 30th birthday was not when this started disregarding your needs.
Keep quiet for now and attend the event he helped plan. To me you should be concerned about the effort he makes for his female friend. "Now, I just found out that a friend of his (a woman that I've met once before) wants him to help her plan a 30th birthday party for a friend of theirs (another woman I met once before) in our city. He said he'd definitely help and be glad to."
Enjoy the festivities and take note of his efforts and attention he has for his "friend" I would keep an eye on that situation. Make adjustments and stop giving him everything when you keep getting nothing. If the event is great, have fun and casually mention it to him what a great job he did planning her birthday party. Then say nothing else.
You shouldn't have to ask to be treated special. Your marriage has probably reached a plateau and so a little effort on both your parts is going to be needed for the spark to keep burning. If you are feeling jealous you may be picking up on some things that you don't realize consciously. Most of affairs do begin in the workplace and If you are feeling jealous and maybe hurt then you do need to work something out with your husband.
I had my 30th birthday recently and my husband didn't do anything for it. For months leading up to it, I had been telling him that I want to do something special, since I only turn 30 once. We moved away from our family and friends a few years ago and every birthday since has just been the two of us and I miss the big fuss. I gave him hints, like asking our friends to meet us for dinner, or a quick trip somewhere, a night out on the town, something more than what he has done for me on my birthday. (FTR, I have done things for him for his birthday and he hasn't had his 30th yet.)
So my birthday came, we had cake at home and he gave me a gift (that I had picked out and saved a photo on the computer and he went and bought it that day). And that was it. Once the candles were blown out, it was over.
Now, I just found out that a friend of his (a woman that I've met once before) wants him to help her plan a 30th birthday party for a friend of theirs (another woman I met once before) in our city. He said he'd definitely help and be glad to.
I don't get it. He can plan a party for her but can't do anything for me? How am I supposed to suppress my anger when I'm invited to this party, knowing that my husband did this for someone else and not for me?
Do you hear that?!?
Yeah! There it is again!!! Like high pitched whiny noise.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I could be wrong but that's how I read this situation.
You innocent...husband has a lover!
How do you even revive a 5 year old thread and why?
