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Old 02-14-2011, 04:45 PM
 
Location: state of procrastination
3,487 posts, read 6,340,820 times
Reputation: 2889

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Quote:
Originally Posted by MissLucky View Post
Miyu, do you have any kids? I would be careful passing judgements on kids and parents whose situations I know nothing about if I were you. Most parents already know this. My son looks like he could be 12, but he's only 7 and a special needs child. I'll definitely accompany him in the public restrooms until I'm positive that he can handle himself. BTW, why does this bother you?
Nowhere did I pass judgments on other people's situations and I already said that I didn't think it was a big deal, so obviously this does not bother me. I'm just wondering what others think is socially acceptable. I have given you no reason to be defensive.

Quote:
Originally Posted by FinsterRufus View Post
What other option is there? It seems to be OK with everybody to take their boy into the ladies room but a girl out with her daddy has to learn to go in there by themselves - seeing as it freaks people out so much to see a man in the ladies'.

Perhaps all of you who cast aspersions on other people's parenting because they dare to let their children go to the bathroom by themselves could at least relax your stance on men not being allowed to accompany their female children into the ladies' room.
Good point. I wouldn't care if a man walks into the women's bathroom with a little girl as there is good reason. It's not like he's doing it to be a perv. I'd rather have my husband take our future female children into a woman's bathroom than a man's room, esp since the women's room has already been designated the "coed children's room". Why should a man have to rely on a stranger woman to take care of his little girl if she is at the age where she can't even get on the toilet or wipe herself? Plus, family rooms are all coed so in the absence of a family bathroom I don't see much better options. We only have a few coed bathrooms around here in large malls.
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Old 02-14-2011, 07:22 PM
 
Location: Brooklyn, New York
1,194 posts, read 1,560,432 times
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I'd take my son into the ladies room until he's about 5-6(depending on the area/gut instinct), I dont care if the other females like it. My son's safety trumps the feelings of any females who think that he doesnt belong in there. As long as he's in a stall doing his business and behaving why should anyone else care?
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Old 02-15-2011, 05:56 AM
 
Location: somewhere
4,264 posts, read 8,139,589 times
Reputation: 3143
Quote:
Originally Posted by miyu View Post
Nowhere did I pass judgments on other people's situations and I already said that I didn't think it was a big deal, so obviously this does not bother me. I'm just wondering what others think is socially acceptable. I have given you no reason to be defensive.



Good point. I wouldn't care if a man walks into the women's bathroom with a little girl as there is good reason. It's not like he's doing it to be a perv. I'd rather have my husband take our future female children into a woman's bathroom than a man's room, esp since the women's room has already been designated the "coed children's room". Why should a man have to rely on a stranger woman to take care of his little girl if she is at the age where she can't even get on the toilet or wipe herself? Plus, family rooms are all coed so in the absence of a family bathroom I don't see much better options. We only have a few coed bathrooms around here in large malls.
I have seen Dad's ask women if they will keep an eye on the daughters, if I were a Dad I wouldn't want a stranger taking care of my daughter, men are not the only people that are perv's. So until there are family restrooms in every public area there are going to be times that there may be some instances where someone may be uncomfortable because someone of the opposite sex may be in the restroom.

Had to add if I were asked by a Dad to take care of his daughter in the restroom I would be very uncomfortable doing so, not because I don't want to be helpful. but someone could then say I did something to hurt the child.
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Old 02-15-2011, 07:37 AM
 
Location: Chicago's burbs
1,013 posts, read 4,131,929 times
Reputation: 905
My DS is 4 1/2 (turns 5 in May) and I still bring him to the restroom with me. I don't feel he is old enough to go by himself yet. I'm not sure when I will be comfortable sending him to the men's room alone? My DD is only 7 months now so this isn't an issue yet, but I do wonder how we will handle it when she is out with DH without me and she has to use the restroom? There's an extra wierd factor for little girls going in the men's room, since urinals are out in the open.
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Old 02-15-2011, 07:39 AM
 
Location: somewhere
4,264 posts, read 8,139,589 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sbd78 View Post
My DS is 4 1/2 (turns 5 in May) and I still bring him to the restroom with me. I don't feel he is old enough to go by himself yet. I'm not sure when I will be comfortable sending him to the men's room alone? My DD is only 7 months now so this isn't an issue yet, but I do wonder how we will handle it when she is out with DH without me and she has to use the restroom? There's an extra wierd factor for little girls going in the men's room, since urinals are out in the open.
I agree and think I would rather my husband go into a womens bathroom then to take my daughter into the mens. At least in womens the toliets are behind doors.
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Old 02-15-2011, 07:46 AM
 
4,267 posts, read 5,296,642 times
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My DH takes dd into the men's room with him when he is out and about. He doesn't like it because he says that Men's rooms are disgusting but at 4 1/2 she's too young to go in and use the ladies room by herself. I know she's safe in there because she's with DH and I'm not worried about her seeing a penis. I would not want to see Dad's coming in the ladies room with their daughters. I think that could lead to bigger problems.

I have no problem whatsoever with Moms bringing their boys into the ladies room up until whatever age they feel comfortable. I've heard of some pretty inappropriate things going on in Men's rooms but have never heard of or seen anything weird going on in ladies rooms. When my dd is a little older and more independent I would have no problem with my DH standing outside the ladies room door while she goes in herself. I would feel less comfortable sending a son into the Men's room alone at a younger age.
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Old 02-15-2011, 08:14 AM
 
Location: Philadelphia, PA
1,164 posts, read 1,735,336 times
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This reminds me of the time when my sister, two of her daughters, and I went to the zoo. My two nieces (11 and 8 at the time) and I had to use the restroom, so I took both of them with me. There was no way I was going to let them go into the restroom place by themselves! I let them use the bathroom first so I could make sure sure that they got out okay and that everything was fine; when it was my turn to use the restroom, I told them to stay together near the entrance of the restroom and to not move from that one spot. I wanted them to stand in a spot were there were many people around (the restroom was filled with ladies and their children). I didn't want them to be dragged into an empty stall by someone to do God knows what. Alas, everything went well.

You can never be too careful these days!
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Old 02-15-2011, 08:31 AM
 
9,173 posts, read 7,035,153 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stressedCollegeGirl89 View Post
This reminds me of the time when my sister, two of her daughters, and I went to the zoo. My two nieces (11 and 8 at the time) and I had to use the restroom, so I took both of them with me. There was no way I was going to let them go into the restroom place by themselves! I let them use the bathroom first so I could make sure sure that they got out okay and that everything was fine; when it was my turn to use the restroom, I told them to stay together near the entrance of the restroom and to not move from that one spot. I wanted them to stand in a spot were there were many people around (the restroom was filled with ladies and their children). I didn't want them to be dragged into an empty stall by someone to do God knows what. Alas, everything went well.

You can never be too careful these days!
If the restroom was filled with ladies and children, who was the someone that was going to drag your nieces into an "empty stall to do God knows what"? And how were they going to accomplish this surrounded by women and children? This is where this whole paranoia has gotten ridiculous.

For that matter, where in any place like a zoo is there ever an empty stall in the ladies?

By all means accompany your children into the bathroom when you're at a rest stop or otherwise dodgy environment with nobody around. Either sex in either bathroom as far as I'm concerned.

But it's really getting silly to overcrowd already overcrowded bathrooms with 11 year olds and their parents when they should be able to go about their business without being hovered over - and I don't want you standing in front of the sink so I can't get to it when there's ZERO danger of your child being molested in front of 20 other people.
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Old 02-15-2011, 08:52 AM
 
Location: Denver 'burbs
21,851 posts, read 23,076,737 times
Reputation: 37217
Quote:
Originally Posted by FinsterRufus View Post
If the restroom was filled with ladies and children, who was the someone that was going to drag your nieces into an "empty stall to do God knows what"? And how were they going to accomplish this surrounded by women and children? This is where this whole paranoia has gotten ridiculous.

For that matter, where in any place like a zoo is there ever an empty stall in the ladies?

By all means accompany your children into the bathroom when you're at a rest stop or otherwise dodgy environment with nobody around. Either sex in either bathroom as far as I'm concerned.

But it's really getting silly to overcrowd already overcrowded bathrooms with 11 year olds and their parents when they should be able to go about their business without being hovered over - and I don't want you standing in front of the sink so I can't get to it when there's ZERO danger of your child being molested in front of 20 other people.
This. Exactly.
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Old 02-15-2011, 08:57 AM
 
4,267 posts, read 5,296,642 times
Reputation: 3579
Quote:
Originally Posted by FinsterRufus View Post
If the restroom was filled with ladies and children, who was the someone that was going to drag your nieces into an "empty stall to do God knows what"? And how were they going to accomplish this surrounded by women and children? This is where this whole paranoia has gotten ridiculous.

For that matter, where in any place like a zoo is there ever an empty stall in the ladies?

By all means accompany your children into the bathroom when you're at a rest stop or otherwise dodgy environment with nobody around. Either sex in either bathroom as far as I'm concerned.

But it's really getting silly to overcrowd already overcrowded bathrooms with 11 year olds and their parents when they should be able to go about their business without being hovered over - and I don't want you standing in front of the sink so I can't get to it when there's ZERO danger of your child being molested in front of 20 other people.
I agree. Most situations are perfectly safe. I'd be much more cautious about the deserted bathroom at a rest stop then the busy ladies room at the zoo.
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