Married men who don't get enough sex (husbands, family, statistics)

[stick2dascript]

Originally Posted by singleinsc1

I would say its a combination of a lot of things. For women sex is purely mental and mainly for men sex is physical. A woman has to feel secure, cared for, concerned about, romanced, and many things depending on the female for her libido to get going. If a man has become complacent, distant due to life stressors, or distracted from her or the relationship in anyway it will definitely turn the woman off and leave him high and dry.

I would disagree with that. Second for women us a bit mental but for a married woman to make excuses based on she's not in the mood is a problem, she needs to do what needs to be done to make her husband happy, especially if he's paying the bills and she's a housewife, that's just bad behavior. Also women do like good looking men if a man is hot her mind is on sexing him, nothing else a woman who doesn't want to have sex with her husband will give off the intention that's she's using him for other reasons and with men having to work for sec this is something you don't want to do.

Originally Posted by Ascension2012

Its mostly because women love to use the power of vajayjay to their advantage. This is very common in relationships, where sex is being withheld or used as a punishment/reward. Guys that wait 90 days for sex when they start dating or see the need to shower women with gifts and put them on a pedestal, early on in their dating, usualy give up this power early on and are then set for life of sexual frustration. Knowing that you can never get laid when you want to, due to your white knighthood and "respect" for women, must be suicidal, i couldnt even imagine living like that.

Your right, modern women use sex as a tool for stability and once married find out their not attracted to each other. The media promotes this behavior and women take advantage of it.

[udolipixie]

Originally Posted by lpfan921

I'm not married, but i was reading an article about this topic, about married men who don't get enough sex from their wives. This is making me very reluctant to ever get married.

Does this happen for biology reasons? Do men always want sex more than women?

Or does this happen because the man doesn't do a good enough job making the woman feel special? Do married men just get lazy and stop doing the romantic things they did to win over the woman in the first place?

Likely married men don't get enough sex as:
- generally women have a lower sex drive than men

- generally women get less pleasure from sex than men

- possibly women more often let their feelings about a partner affect thier desire to have sex with them
ex: woman won't have sex with a partner she's angry with while the man will.

- possibly women have more factors lowering their desire for sex
ex: birth control

- often men don't care about women's pleasure
ex: 'her orgasm is her responsibility'

- often men pull a switch-and-bait with maintaining emotional intimacy and attraction
ex: romance while dating was high then the romance took a nose dive when married

[fleetiebelle]

Originally Posted by onihC

It is often said that married women are exhausted and therefore don’t want to have sex. I wonder how college girls do it handling part time jobs, sleepless nights studying and preparing projects, homework, keeping their apartment clean, etc. and still have time to shag with guys and actually enjoy it.

I imagine that the college women with a lifestyle you describe aren't having that all that much sex, because they too are tired and exhausted. The ones who are doing the deed often most likely have access to mom and dad's credit cards and don't have a job outside of classes.

[udolipixie]

Originally Posted by stick2dascript

I would disagree with that. Second for women us a bit mental but for a married woman to make excuses based on she's not in the mood is a problem, she needs to do what needs to be done to make her husband happy, especially if he's paying the bills and she's a housewife, that's just bad behavior. Also women do like good looking men if a man is hot her mind is on sexing him, nothing else a woman who doesn't want to have sex with her husband will give off the intention that's she's using him for other reasons and with men having to work for sec this is something you don't want to do.

Your right, modern women use sex as a tool for stability and once married find out their not attracted to each other. The media promotes this behavior and women take advantage of it.

Bit curious as to why she shuts up and puts out rather than finding out why she isn't in the mood or the husband does what needs to be done to get her in the mood.

More curious as to it seems why entitlement to sex regardless of your partner's consent or desire isn't bad behavior.

The media also promote the behavior that in marriage sex is duty woman owe men unless there is a good reason implying her lack of consent/desire isn't a good reason. Many men take advantage of that.

Often seems rather than a mutual consensual activity both desire to give and get pleasure men view sex in relationships as owed to him and all about his happiness with her consent and desire being dismissable.

[Ascension2012]

Originally Posted by udolipixie

Likely married men don't get enough sex as:
- generally women have a lower sex drive than men

- generally women get less pleasure from sex than men

WRONG and WRONG. Women have at the very least equal sex drive to men and many sources claim its actualy higher. Women think about sex all day, just like men do, but because of gender expectations and women not wanting to look like sluts, most cover it up. More than likely, women get MORE pleasure from sex, not less. Think about who is usualy more vocal during sex and how that relates. Its ok to admit that we all love sex. Hate this inhibited society and most population living in the dark. Open up your eyes, people.

[onihC]

Originally Posted by fleetiebelle

I imagine that the college women with a lifestyle you describe aren't having that all that much sex, because they too are tired and exhausted. The ones who are doing the deed often most likely have access to mom and dad's credit cards and don't have a job outside of classes.

I thought the same Fleetiebelle but in the college dorms of one of the universities I went to it was sometimes embarrassing to hear the action throughout the week. I had a friend who worked part time with his girl in a pizza joint that was opened late hours. They still had sex even after work. Work, projects, homework, presentations, tests, etc. and I don’t remember any complains about his girl having headaches, being depressed, being too tired for sex, and all other reasons commonly heard from married women.

As for the whole “He ain’t getting permission to have sex with me unless he does house chores” how would it be if the husband had the same attitude “Alright, no house chores from me unless you let me have sex”. It’s a vicious circle.

[stick2dascript]

Originally Posted by udolipixie

Bit curious as to why she shuts up and puts out rather than finding out why she isn't in the mood or the husband does what needs to be done to get her in the mood.

More curious as to it seems why entitlement to sex regardless of your partner's consent or desire isn't bad behavior.

The media also promote the behavior that in marriage sex is duty woman owe men unless there is a good reason implying her lack of consent/desire isn't a good reason. Many men take advantage of that.

Often seems rather than a mutual consensual activity both desire to give and get pleasure men view sex in relationships as owed to him and all about his happiness with her consent and desire being dismissable.

Whatever problems she feels in interfering with her having second with her husband, she needs to find answers correct the issue but it's a lot of married men who don't sleep with their wives anymore and that's not a good look at all.

I think some women don't even look at the issue, communication between the two isn't great and some marry for the benefits of marriage rather than the love of the act. Men

[udolipixie]

Originally Posted by calicali01

I see your point, but the husband is not going to work for nothing. His work efforts not only contribute to her well being, but (hopefully) he's also being faithful to her, so at the very least even when she's tired the wife should "woman up" and take care of her man because, after all, men go to work tired and put in long hours for their good of their family even though they may not want to.

If a woman can't sacrifice in that way, she should have never gotten married OR she should allow her man have sex with other women on the side.

Likely the women is working and her efforts not only contribute to his well being but she's also being faithful to him. Most households are two-income so many women go to work tired and put in long hours for the good of their family even though they may not want to and going by statistics they also put in more hours when they come home and do most of the childcare/household duties.

Perhaps the man would be suited to 'man up' and ensure his wife desires sex with him rather than think 'I work and I'm faithful so put out'.

Always amusing how often men overlook that the woman is likely working and being faithful as well.

[Checkered24]

Originally Posted by Ascension2012

WRONG and WRONG. Women have at the very least equal sex drive to men and many sources claim its actualy higher. Women think about sex all day, just like men do, but because of gender expectations and women not wanting to look like sluts, most cover it up. More than likely, women get MORE pleasure from sex, not less. Think about who is usualy more vocal during sex and how that relates. Its ok to admit that we all love sex. Hate this inhibited society and most population living in the dark. Open up your eyes, people.

+1 (I would rep you, but already did today elsewhere!).

I cannot speak for everyone's experience, but I find women (particularly my wife) to have a very strong sex drive. She intiates more than I do. That doesn't mean she is always ready, if she is worn down, or stressed, but she certainly is not shy seeking sex either. Also, I know the experience of women during sex varies greatly too, but if it is satisfying sex, women can have pleasure far more often than men can have during sex.

[onihC]

Someone said women do not enjoy sex as much. I disagree. Women have a little organ who’s sole exclusive purpose is SEXUAL PLEASURE: the clitoris. It’s small but it has double/triple of nerve endings compared to a penis. No wonder it is a little volcano of passion. Women have the capacity to enjoy multiple orgasms without the need of taking a rest. That means, pleasure that keeps going and going and going. A woman’s orgasm can last 3 times or more than a male orgasm. And the list goes on and on.

Originally Posted by udolipixie

Most households are two-income so many women go to work tired and put in long hours for the good of their family even though they may not want to and going by statistics they also put in more hours when they come home and do most of the childcare/household duties.

And there are households where BOTH work in and out of the house, still, the woman is never in the mood for sex. That is why I wondered how college girls do it handling classes, projects, homework, tests, part time job, etc. and still be in the mood for sex and actually enjoy it.

Perhaps the man would be suited to 'man up' and ensure his wife desires sex with him rather than think 'I work and I'm faithful so put out'.

Now, there are some cases out there where it is the man who has the so called headaches, too tired, is depressed, and all those reasons heard from married women. Should the woman “woman up” to get sex? If so, how’s that?