Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I don't know, I've only had one, that's the issue here.
Having sex with a lot of women doesn't mean jack....... trust me on this, I don't have a huge number under my belt, but as I got older and the amount I did have, I realized it just doesn't make much difference, as long as you are attentive to the woman you are with and understand her needs, that is all that matters because some woman are different and want different things, so even if you were with a lot of other women, you'd still be back to where you are having to learn what she wants.... you get what I 'm trying to say to you.
In other words, it's just the male ego at work thinking you have to bag a lot of women "to be a man"...... which is just stupid macho energy bull**** anyways.....
Don't be that dumb macho guy..... it gets really old really quick, specially as you get older, you see some guy in his 40's trying to be "stud" and frankly, sad to watch......
Playing the field will not bring clarity or happiness, it will not solve any problems, prevent relationship disasters or scratch an itch. It will create distance between you, insecurity, and ruin your trust and intimacy, IMO. Lucky you for having found each other. If it is only the two of you for the rest of your lives, you have something wonderful and unique. You don't have to "settle" or move in together, just enjoy what you have. It is hard to find.
Exactly, that's why I'm trying to avoid those conflicting feelings in the future. And honestly, how would someone know they made the right decision years down the line?
You cannot avoid these feelings in the future. This is but one example of why I said your approach was childlike.
You cannot avoid those feelings. You CHOOSE every day to stay with your partner, regardless of how many handsome men you come across or how many times you think, "What if?" That is the definition of commitment.
You say you know 2 couples like me and my girlfriend, but then say that if we're curious then we are nowhere near those two. Can you elaborate a little more, what similarities are you pointing at?
What I meant was they were each other's firsts (HS sweethearts) and there were NO "curious" thoughts between either of them. There were no thoughts of testing the waters and so forth, they both knew they wanted to stay together and eventually get married, which they did.
There's nothing wrong with your situation, I think the couples I mentioned are NOT in the norm, it's just they NEVER had thoughts of being with another person.
Hope that helps and sorry for the typos of the my original post, I was on my phone.
you know, it almost seems that not having had other partners is actually seen as something dreaded, almost like something 'abnormal". it's like you have to prove you are "mature" by dating others, which kind of undermines the original level of commitment and trust demonstrated by this one and only relationship. its kind of sad and a little twisted. i would feel awful if i was in that position and a woman told me the "news" that we "should see other people".
this is where our parents had it easier i think back in the day. yea there were exceptions but in general i don't think they had these twisted "rules" that we have today
What I meant was they were each other's firsts (HS sweethearts) and there were NO "curious" thoughts between either of them. There were no thoughts of testing the waters and so forth, they both knew they wanted to stay together and eventually get married, which they did.
There's nothing wrong with your situation, I think the couples I mentioned are NOT in the norm, it's just they NEVER had thoughts of being with another person.
Hope that helps and sorry for the typos of the my original post, I was on my phone.
Oh ok that makes much more sense now.
I think it all depends on how you grew up and you're environment. My parents stayed together through a horrible marriage, I suffered alot of issues because of it. Ever lasting love is something I think is completely nonexistent. I've seen too much jealousy, too many divorces, too much domestic violence. My best friends mother got killed by his stepfather because of jealousy issues. So I guess observing all these horrible relationships makes me feel like I should get it all out of my system now since it isn't going to last.
But the closest thing ive ever felt to love is my girlfriend. Her overwhelming support and love made me a better man. I'm actually starting to reconsider the whole "getting it out of my system" thing. Just a bit...
you know, it almost seems that not having had other partners is actually seen as something dreaded, almost like something 'abnormal". it's like you have to prove you are "mature" by dating others, which kind of undermines the original level of commitment and trust demonstrated by this one and only relationship. its kind of sad and a little twisted. i would feel awful if i was in that position and a woman told me the "news" that we "should see other people".
this is where our parents had it easier i think back in the day. yea there were exceptions but in general i don't think they had these twisted "rules" that we have today
I know right, I really sucks. Society makes you feel like you're missing out on everything. And if you're not participating, they ostracize you and make you feel like an outsider. This this day my close friends still believe I lost my virginity at 14 not 21 lol
You cannot avoid these feelings in the future. This is but one example of why I said your approach was childlike.
You cannot avoid those feelings. You CHOOSE every day to stay with your partner, regardless of how many handsome men you come across or how many times you think, "What if?" That is the definition of commitment.
Society is changing these rules. Marriage rate is getting lower while infidelity is rising.
I know right, I really sucks. Society makes you feel like you're missing out on everything. And if you're not participating, they ostracize you and make you feel like an outsider. This this day my close friends still believe I lost my virginity at 14 not 21 lol
You're tuning in to the wrong channel. Get new friends whose values are closer to your. Blow off all that stuff about how living an empty life of cheap thrills is supposed to fulfill you. All you get out of it is STD's and aggravation. Listen to your own heart. To thine own self be true. Be your own person. That's what men do. Promiscuity and giving in to peer pressure is what perpetual adolescents do.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
