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I think she means no 'helping' in the sense that it's someone's primary job and the other person is just 'helping.' This is pervasive. She takes care of the house and he 'helps.' She takes care of the kids and he 'babysits'. It implies that housework is not the guy's primary responsibility when in fact it is both people's responsibility.
Exactly what I meant. Thank you. Here's the one I always hear that drives me up a wall: "He's such a good dad... he even helps out with the diapers." !??!
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but seriously, if a woman has a good man, she should make him good meals!! This is not a rocket science really.
And if a man has a good woman, he should make her good meals. I agree, not rocket science at all for two adults to treat each other like two capable adults.
I'm by no means lazy when it comes to cooking (or any other household tasks). I cook like crazy. He loves to cook probably even more. So we both do it, sometimes together, sometimes for each other. After millions of pages of this thread, I'm not gathering what exactly is feminine about cooking (or cleaning) for one's partner. It's not "being a woman" to do household tasks.
There is nothing better than a meal prepared together with love. A couple nights ago he made the homemade ravioli dough with the pasta maker I bought him for his birthday. I made the spinach-goat cheese filling. We put our parts together. He boiled them, while I worked on the sauce. And voila, there was dinner, enjoyed with wine. Then afterwards I can't remember who loaded the dishwasher that particular night. It's not always me, and it's not always him, so it's hard to remember. I'm sure that whoever didn't was probably the one who fed the animals that night.
Of course it goes both ways and please point out to me where in my post have I said that it should ONLY be a woman's job to cook and clean?
Go to the corner so I can teach you how to read!
This thread also gives me shivers. Seems to me that women have stopped being women, bunch of lazy asses.
You implied it again right here!
"Being a woman" means cooking and cleaning. What is "being a man" then?
maybe funny, but so true...I choose to be alone, why? I never, ever want to be a mother to someone again....I know there are husbands that do pitch in, but if you get one who doesn't, who just sits around watching TV...boy, oh boy do I loath that in a man....knowing full well, his mother did everything for him and he thinks it's ok to take advantage of his wife like that....
yes, it is a struggle financially, however, I'll take the struggle rather then hook up with someone who is lazy and won't do anything to help around the house...there is no excuse for being lazy and that is one character flaw that drives me up a wall....someone who has no enthusiasum...someone who doesn't want to try new things....or never wants to go anywhere, someone who feels like it's perfectly normal to sit there on the sofa while her wife is running her ars off trying to get things done...
No thank you
and I know there are women like that, but that doesn't have anything to do with the post I'm responding to....
I believe there is no job allocated to one genre...it's a 50/50 deal, and both parties should work together to help each other out...when people say, its a woman's job to do this or that, they are wrong, it's nobody's JOB, no one signed on to get paid for services rendered...what it is about is companionship....helping each other and working together....
it's not about running up the charges and expecting hubby or wife to carry that load, to me, that is an infidelity to your spouce....
When I get married my husband will know from the beginning Im a career women first...before a housewife...whoever gets home first will start dinner...Im the wife, not the maid...we will take care of the house together, that will include everything...I can mow the lawn, shovel the sidewalk when it snows... as well as cook and dust...
Im not looking to be someones mom...but a wife...
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Originally Posted by Mt-7
This is the post I have been looking for. Just how is it all viewed by today's young woman. Many happy tomorrows for you
We can't speak for all women, but I agree with jeepgirl. I think equally shared responsibility is going to be necessary for a lot of us for the sake of health. I can't imagine running the home by myself along with having a career. I'm so tired when I get home (sometimes stressed, too) and I'm grateful that my dh recognizes this and does his part.
"Being a woman" means cooking and cleaning. What is "being a man" then?
From Biblical times women cooked and cleaned, bottom line. I don't understand women who refuse to do it. Whether or not men are equal contributors is a different conversation, I'm only talking about women. If you read the original thread, the woman says: "he wants me to do housewife things". She just simply doesn't want to do what is basic necessities and what would make any man happy. That's what I'm talking about.
My husband and I also like to cook together. I'm better with meats, he is better with vegetables. Our personal examples I don't feel are relevant.
From Biblical times women cooked and cleaned, bottom line. I don't understand women who refuse to do it. Whether or not men are equal contributors is a different conversation, I'm only talking about women. If you read the original thread, the woman says: "he wants me to do housewife things". She just simply doesn't want to do what is basic necessities and what would make any man happy. That's what I'm talking about.
My husband and I also like to cook together. I'm better with meats, he is better with vegetables. Our personal examples I don't feel are relevant.
From biblical times, people were property, women had no rights, etc, etc, etc...using the past to justify bad behavior in the present and future is sad and doesn't make any sense.
The fact that in your mind, what it takes to make a man happy is someone else doing the household chores is another conversation, as well. A scary conversation, I imagine.
Eating out every meal is not only expensive and unneccesary waste of money, it's also unhealthy. There is nothing better than a homemade meal prepared with love, and not by someone who had a crappy day and couldn't care less if you die tomorrow.
I eat very healthy, I generally only eat out at healthy places. Also, I actually hate home cooked meals generally
but seriously, if a woman has a good man, she should make him good meals!! This is not a rocket science really.
My husband prefers to eat out too. Or just grab something at work (hospital)on the way home
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