Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I come from southern California, Hombre, where I was one of the few white children in the neighborhood. Then I moved all around the country, starting from when I was 20. I also joined the military, where I have regularly worked for black men and women and have had black men and women work for me. I currently live in a very mixed racial neighborhood in the Atlanta suburbs (by choice... diversity is what I'm comfortable with), where I'll spare you the cliche of saying I have a lots of black friends, but it's true. I do. My wife, who grew up in the same kind of neighborhood I did has black aunts (her white uncles married black women), and she teaches at a predominantly black school .. again, by choice. She taught in a predominantly white school once and didn't like it because she couldn't relate do the kids or parents. One of the first things black people remark on when they come into our home is that my daughter has books about black people on her shelves. (She's about to turn 11.) At first, I was kind of tripped out that they thought that was weird... but I have learned that it's unusual. This is not because I'm some a self conscious liberal.. I assure you, I'm not. We just let her pick her own reading material, and she naturally picks books about all kinds of people, as she picks friends from all backgrounds. She does this because this a natural reflection of the world we raised her in. We raised her in this kind of world because it's the world we were raised in.
There... did I prove my bona fides to you?
I don't think you are racist. I can understand where your view comes from now that I know you are married. Believe it or not. The dating game has changed so much in the past few years. Expectations are changing and the way men and women interact has changed.
If you really want to know what things are like. Spend some time with single men that are looking for wives. You will get more insight then you ever imagined. Things are not the same man.
Be safe and enjoy that wife and kids. You are a lucky guy!
I come from southern California, Hombre, where I was one of the few white children in the neighborhood. Then I moved all around the country, starting from when I was 20. I also joined the military, where I have regularly worked for black men and women and have had black men and women work for me. I currently live in a very mixed racial neighborhood in the Atlanta suburbs (by choice... diversity is what I'm comfortable with), where I'll spare you the cliche of saying I have a lots of black friends, but it's true. I do. My wife, who grew up in the same kind of neighborhood I did has black aunts (her white uncles married black women), and she teaches at a predominantly black school .. again, by choice. She taught in a predominantly white school once and didn't like it because she couldn't relate do the kids or parents. One of the first things black people remark on when they come into our home is that my daughter has books about black people on her shelves. (She's about to turn 11.) At first, I was kind of tripped out that they thought that was weird... but I have learned that it's unusual. This is not because I'm some a self conscious liberal.. I assure you, I'm not. We just let her pick her own reading material, and she naturally picks books about all kinds of people, as she picks friends from all backgrounds. She does this because this a natural reflection of the world we raised her in. We raised her in this kind of world because it's the world we were raised in.
There... did I prove my bona fides to you?
No, you did not.
I'm not American and therefore don't see things as "black and white" as you do (pun intended). The problem is that you are confusing poor with black. It's because there are so many poor people in America who just so happen to be black, so it's easy to profile them or say "black people do X" or "white people do Y". Black schools, white schools? These are all alien terms to me. Like it or not, you are profiling people based on skin colour, rather than economic and social circumstance. I know enough about your history to know that in your neck of the woods, a black person would most likely be told to go to the back of the bus not so long ago.
Again, I am not American and I am by no means accusing you of being racist, but I just don't like it when Americans make statements like these. It only serves to enforce the divide that's already there and it reinforces so many negative stereotypes.
What about the nature of the relationship changes who should pay?
Why if it's a romantic relationship should the asker pay?
Why is it different for non-romantic relationships?
Regardless of gender, asking for a date is putting yourself in the position of host, and your date the position of guest. Hosts do not ask guests to pay. Guests may offer, but hosts should not request. It's rude.
Regardless of gender, asking for a date is putting yourself in the position of host, and your date the position of guest. Hosts do not ask guests to pay. Guests may offer, but hosts should not request. It's rude.
And yes, it's really that simple.
Same exact thing I was trying to explain that poster but seems he doesn't get it. It can't be any simpler than that.
Regardless of gender, asking for a date is putting yourself in the position of host, and your date the position of guest. Hosts do not ask guests to pay. Guests may offer, but hosts should not request. It's rude.
And yes, it's really that simple.
Ok. If it is that simple, then why, if I ask my friend if he wants to go to a basketball game does he usually buy his ticket and I buy mine? Not to mention any concessions, giant foam fingers, etc?
What if she is the one who extended the invite? Should he still pay in that case, since she is the host?
Some men prefer to be in charge of paying for everything for the women they like (especially when they earn more), so I think OP's date prefers to be with that kind. Nothing wrong with it.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
